


Always And Forever.

by Saltandburnboys



Series: Always and Forever Series. [1]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: AU, Alpha/Beta, Beta!Jensen, Hurt/Comfort, Knotting, M/M, Unrequited, Werewolves, alpha!Jared, bottom!Jensen, protective!Jared
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-14
Updated: 2012-08-14
Packaged: 2017-11-12 03:47:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 28
Words: 58,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/486343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saltandburnboys/pseuds/Saltandburnboys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Werewolves had lived in peace with each other for centuries and remained unheeded by the humans oblivious to their very existence.   Until the time when a new Alpha came to power and began to covet lands and assets that were not his own, waging war against his neighbouring packs.  It was time for another Alpha to step up to the challenge and stop the rogue, even if the situation turned out to be far more complex that anyone had ever anticipated</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One.

**Author's Note:**

> I own nothing. Jensen and Jared belong to themselves, as does every other actor in this story. Jensen and Jared are not in a relationship and neither are Jensen and Jeff. None of them are werewolves. This is pure and utter fiction, none of this is true or ever happened. This is a COMPLETED story. No money was made from this story.
> 
>  
> 
> I apologise to Jeffrey Dean Morgan and Jake Abel for making them such bastards, but I needed villains and they make such good baddies. I don’t believe in Genevieve bashing and this is not what this story is about; I’m sure she is awesome but I needed a love rival for Jared and she was such a good Ruby and made a great baddie in the programme that I just couldn’t resist using her here. I apologise for abusing Jensen sooo badly in this story but I am a bit of a hurt!Jensen and protective!Jared junkie so this is what came out. I KNOW none of the people in my story are how I have written this, it is a work of complete and utter self-indulgent fiction. I am sure they are all amazingly awesome people. 
> 
>  
> 
> All the words in italics describe events that happened in the past. This story is written from multiple points of view.
> 
> Soundtrack to Chapter One: Sarah Mc Lachlan- 'Angel' for the second half of the chapter as Jensen considers himself and the dream that Jared would save him from his Hell.
> 
> This was the first story I ever posted so...please be kind! Lol!

** Chapter One. **

_Jared._  
  
The two packs had been at odds for centuries; one Alpha after another had inherited the feud.  It was in their blood.  Jared hated it; when he had first become Alpha, he had gone to Morgan and asked him to put aside their differences and leave one another’s territory alone.  Jared was sure they would never be allies but, in his eyes, it was madness to keep losing good wolves to pointless border skirmishes whenever Morgan decided he wanted to expand his territory.  But it was not to be.

** Five Years Later. **

Jared came back to the territory, from another fight, with his second in command, Chad, to find three dead wolves lying right outside his house.  Jared ran through the village to find the guards but no one had seen anything, no one had even smelt another wolf in the territory.  It was a warning; Morgan was telling him he could enter Jared’s lands unnoticed and do as he wanted.  Chad paced behind him, never one to hide his anger, and David, the head of his guard, gathered others to bury the bodies.

'This has got to end, Jay, _you_ have to finish it, once and for all.'  Chad began the argument they'd had so many times before. 

'You know that's not possible, Chad, we go to war now and we'll come back with less than half of what we went out with.'  Jared sighed.  'The remaining pack will be left vulnerable to any other pack that has their eyes set on our lands.  I can't do that, not until I’ve found a way to get to Morgan.  With him gone, I'll claim Alpha status over his pack and the ones who don't want to follow me will be banished to find their own packs.'  

Chad huffed at his Alpha but didn't argue, knowing that Jared spoke the truth and that his best friend always had the pack's best interests at heart.  'But I will not let this go unanswered; I'll meet with Morgan and demand an explanation as to why he sent his wolves into my lands and those wolves responsible will be held accountable.'  He growled and walked into his house slamming the door behind him.  

Two days later found Jared, Chad and Chris, his trusted friend, on the edge of Morgan's borders again, this time in human form.  Jared did not plan to fight Morgan, not today anyway, but he had to show his pack he wasn't going to just accept what Morgan had done.   He needed their respect and wouldn't keep it if he let the deaths go without retribution.  

Jared knew the werewolves stationed at Morgan’s borders would smell their presence and alert their Alpha so he waited patiently for Morgan to come and meet him.  It had been several years since Jared had laid eyes on the other man and, then, Jared had been a freshly appointed and slightly naive Alpha.  Now, though, he was battle hardened and experienced in the ways of an Alpha wolf and stood proud at the border.  

'Jared, to what do I owe this pleasure?'  Jared subtly looked over the shorter man, cataloguing any obvious weak spots, sure the other wolf was doing the same.  Morgan looked older, his black hair flecked with grey, and his body wearing a few more scars than it had had when they last met.  

But that wasn't the greatest difference Jared saw; at Morgan's side was a smaller man, on his knees, with a silver collar around his neck and a leash attached to it which Morgan held tightly in his grasp.  This was unheard of in werewolf law, no man could keep another chained up like this, no matter his crime; he should be in prison not shackled to the Head Alpha.  It was strange and not a little disconcerting to see.  Jared heard Chris growl behind him and Chad gasp when they took in the sight. 

'Morgan, what's the meaning of this?'  He waved a hand in the direction of the kneeling man whom had not even raised his head to acknowledge their presence. 

'Oh, do you like him, Jay?’  Morgan asked Jared as though the man next to him were nothing more than a shiny new toy instead of another human being.  ‘This is my Beta, Jensen.’  Jared took a step back and brought a hand to his mouth.  It wasn't possible; no-one treated their mate like that and if this Jensen was the Head Beta of the entire Morgan Pack he should not be seen  grovelling like this.  He was meant to be a strength at his Alpha's side; he was meant to be loyal, loving and supportive of his Alpha.  

'I found him in the Welling Pack when I killed Tom.  They all bowed to their true Alpha after that.'  He placed a hand firmly on the back of Jensen's neck. 'Well, except Jensen, of course, but he's learned his place now, even if it did take a while.'  Morgan patted the man, like a dog, heedless of the flinches triggered by each touch. 

Jared wanted to laugh or maybe cry at the ridiculousness of what the other man was saying.  'Morgan, you can't be serious?  You can't _force_ someone to be your mate.  If he doesn't submit willingly, he'll never be your mate.'

'Oh, get off your high horse, Jay, he's mate enough that he bends over when I want him to, that's fine with me.'  He winked at Jared who felt a chill run down his spine.  'Plus, this way he never gets to say no.'  

Jared had never felt so angry, he was practically vibrating with it, his wolf clawing to be set free to rip this bastard to shreds.  He knew he couldn't do anything, not now, not with his pack so far away and them standing, weaponless, on the edges of enemy territory.  But this couldn't continue.  

Jared was sure Jensen's pack would abhor seeing the man this way so they could have no real love for Morgan as their Head Alpha and that might work in Jared’s  favour .  Jared had never before considered that he might have allies within Morgan’s own pack and that changed the odds in a battle considerably, perhaps he had finally found Morgan’s weakness after all. 

Morgan continued on, seemingly unaware of Jared's internal fumings.  'Look at his lips, Jay, have you ever seen such perfect cock-sucking lips in your life?'  Morgan fisted his hand in the kneeling man's hair and raised his head so that Jared and his friends could see the Beta’s face.  

Jared noticed the flush of shame that spread across the man's cheeks but was momentarily stunned by how  incredibly beautiful the man was; it was no surprise that he had caught Morgan's eye.  He was several years younger than Jared himself and looked half terrified and half humiliated by their presence.  

Jared aimed a small smile at the man, hoping to be reassuring, but the Beta just dropped his eyes instantly and Jared could see him shaking under Morgan's hand.  Morgan's eyes narrowed at Jared and he tightened his grip on Jensen's hair hard enough that Jared heard a soft whimper before it was bitten back. 

'Morgan, you...you _can't_ do this.  It's not right; even you must know that.'  Jared tried again, even an evil man like Morgan had to have some basic understanding of right and wrong.  He _had_ to.

'Jay, I can do whatever the hell I like, I'm the Head Alpha and not one of my wolves would dare question me, and the ones that have,' he smiled cruelly, 'well, let's just say they aren't around to voice their treacherous opinions anymore.  Anyway, enough about my bitch.'  Jared flinched at the word, 'What can I do for you, Jay?'  

Jared really hated that the older Alpha called him by his nickname, like they were friends, but he let it slide.  Jared knew when to pick his battles and that blatant show of disrespect just wasn’t worth it.  

'I want to know the meaning of the three dead wolves left on my doorstep.'  Jared said, as neutrally as possible, despite the anger threatening to bubble up into his voice at the thought of his dead friends.

'I have no idea what you're talking about, Jay; none of my wolves have been out hunting in the last week since we've been planning the celebration.'  The older Alpha was clearly trying to look sympathetic, in an attempt to hide the fact that they both _knew_ he was responsible for the deaths, but he failed miserably.  It was obviously a look his face didn’t wear very often.

It was an obvious lure to draw Jared in but he couldn’t help but take the bait; Jared wanted to know as much as possible about Morgan’s pack and their movements so if Morgan was arrogant enough to give him that information, Jared wasn’t inclined to stop him.  'Celebration?'  Jared really didn't like the sound of that; he really didn't want to think about what a sadistic bastard like Morgan felt warranted a celebration. 

'My marriage, of course.  Jensen and I are gonna be married so that in the eyes of my pack, and every other pack for that matter, he is completely mine.'  He laughed.  'Not that anyone would dare touch him, not that they'd want to now anyway, eh, Jensen?'  Jared looked puzzled when he saw Jensen slowly nod his head; that wasn't right, Jared was pretty sure that there were many Alphas in this pack, and probably his own  as well , who would be more than willing to lay claim to the stunning Beta.  

'What, you think he'll submit to you just because you force a ring on his finger?  It doesn't work that way, Morgan, and you know it.'  In an instant, Morgan was standing right in front of Jared's face with a finger on his chest and Jared knew he'd hit a nerve.  

'You listen to me, boy, this Beta _will_ submit to me as every other wolf in my pack has done.  Now get the fuck off my land before I call my wolves to kick you off it.'  Jared hesitated, not wanting to leave the Beta there with Morgan but not seeing any other alternative.  

'Come on Chris, Chad, we've got to go.'  Jared tried to ignore the pained whimper he heard as Jensen was dragged away by Morgan.

*****

_Jensen._  
  
Jensen had never seen anyone like the Alpha he'd seen today.  He was tall and handsome, with kind hazel eyes that had looked at Jensen like he cared, like Jensen wasn’t something disgusting that he had just scraped off the sole of his shoe.  Jensen had just wanted to leap at him and beg for his protection, for the Alpha to take him back to his pack even if it meant being locked in their prison for the rest of his life for what he'd done, for what he'd allowed himself to become.  At least he would be away from Jeff.  

Jensen knelt next to the bed waiting, _dreading_ , Jeff's arrival, forcing himself not to try and pick at the locks with his hands.  His neck and wrists had enough burns without his hands suffering too.  

In the beginning he had fought tooth and nail, ignoring the sharp pain that disobeying an Alpha’s direct orders had brought.  Jensen wouldn't let Jeff anywhere near him, let alone let him take him to bed.  But then Jeff had brought in four of the children from Jensen's old pack, ones who had been entrusted to Jensen's care before the attack, and told Jensen that their fates were up to him.  He had rolled over like a good little bitch after that.  

That didn't mean he could accept Jeff as his Alpha, though, that decision wasn't under his control, only when his wolf trusted and loved Jeff's could he ever really submit as Jeff's Beta, no matter how many beatings he received.  Jeff didn't threaten any more members of Jensen's pack mates to make him submit though; even Jeff knew it wasn't really under Jensen's control.  That didn't stop the Alpha using his silver chains and his numerous ‘toys’ on the younger wolf to vent his anger at the man for denying him.  

God, Jensen wished he'd fled after Tom had been killed but he had been entrusted with such an important job, assigned to defend the most vulnerable members of his pack, and he couldn't just leave the weak unprotected from the invading werewolves.

_ Jensen knew this pack, he had heard stories of the ruthless Morgan Pack over the years but, fortunately, he had never met any of them in battle.  But now, today, they had come to claim Tom's lands.  It must have been planned as half the guard was away replenishing vital supplies at the nearest city and hunting in the woods; they wouldn't be back for days.   _

_ Once Tom had  _ _ realised _ _ an invasion was imminent he had given Jensen, and two of his most loyal wolves, orders to guard the weakest of their pack whilst he ordered the rest to guard the borders and help Tom if necessary.  That was Jensen’s strength as a Beta; he had unprecedented skills for protection and  _ _ defence _ _ and would prefer only to fight to protect those who couldn’t protect themselves.  _

_ Jensen, and the two other wolves, rounded up their charges and took them to the hidden caves nearby and kept them quiet and calm whilst the raid raged on in the Welling Pack’s territory.  Jensen itched to help those left behind, his family, but he wouldn't leave his post or his responsibilities.  _

_ Then he heard his Head Alpha fall, the howl tearing through the air and his heart, and knew Tom was gone.  Jensen could feel the fear radiating off his fellow wolves, heavy and almost palpable; they all knew that Morgan could claim them as his pack now and those that did not submit could be killed.  Jensen continued circling the entrance of the cave, watching for intruders and just praying they'd managed to stay under the radar of the invaders.   _

_ Then Jensen caught his first glimpse of the Head Alpha, in human form now, his face and chest covered in blood, Tom's blood.  Jensen growled at the wolf, he would rather die than submit to a murderer.  He and Tom had been friends since they were pups and Jamie, his Beta, was one of Jensen’s best friends.  He would take this Alpha down or, at least, get his pound of flesh before he died.  _

_ 'Well, well, well, what do we have here?'  The smooth, amused voice of the Alpha filtered through the air, 'Shift back, boy, you wouldn't want me to think you’re a coward now, would you?'  Anger surged through Jensen’s veins and he shifted at the implication.  He could take this bastard out as a man.  _

_ 'Hmm, aren't you a vision.'  Jensen stepped back at the heat in the man's eyes, that wasn't right, they were meant to fight, not do... whatever the hell this was.  'Don't be like that, boy, I’ll let you be my Beta, you can help me lead my new pack.' _

_ 'You've got to be kidding!  I'll never join your pack, let alone be your Beta.'  Jensen choked out, incredulous that the Alpha thought he would submit to him after everything he’d just done to Jensen’s pack.  _

_ 'Oh, I think you will, Green Eyes,’ Jensen turned at the sound of a scream from behind him to see Karen, a pregnant werewolf under his care, being dragged off by one of Morgan's men.  The two other guards assigned with him lay dead on the ground.   _

_ Jensen gasped when he felt Morgan whisper in his ear behind him, not  _ _ realising _ _ the other wolf had gotten so close.  'I'll spare their lives and their....virtue,' he smirked, 'if you join my pack and come with me.'  _

_ Jensen shuddered and looked back into the cave, only to see more of Jeff's men advance on the rest of the people there.  'Limited time offer here, Green Eyes, my men aren't very good at controlling themselves.'  He laid his hand on Jensen's ass, making the implications of his offer very clear to him, and Jensen flinched at the contact, 'What do you say, boy?'  And what could he say?  He'd failed to protect his people, he'd failed Tom and Jamie, he deserved to accept his punishment.  Jensen raised his blazing green eyes to the Alpha, _

_ 'Yes.' _

Jensen pushed the memory down, the wolf in that memory was so different from the wolf he was today.  He had been young and headstrong, all of sixteen, when it had happened.  Now he was twenty and he felt like a shadow of his former self.  Jensen was just grateful that his mother and father hadn't lived to see him like this; it was bad enough that his pack mates had to see him kept at heel like a damn dog.  

The only comfort Jensen had was that Jeff had kept his promise that day and his pack had been assimilated into Jeff's without the usual brutality Jeff's men and women usually used upon the claimed.  A few of Jensen’s friends had spoken out after they had seen what Jeff had done to him and had, consequently, been beaten down for it, but those not killed on the day of the battle had survived the takeover and for that Jensen was thankful.  

The door burst open causing Jensen to jump violently and Jeff strode into house.  Jensen could hear him slowly climbing the stairs in his heavy boots and it sounded like a death toll to him, each step bringing Jeff closer to the bedroom.  

'Hey, sweetheart, you miss me today?'  Jeff asked the same question every damn day and all Jensen did was stare at the floor.  The backhand across his face was no surprise nor was the painful grip on his jaw as he was forced to look up at his  jailor .  'I said did you miss me?'

'Yes.'  Jensen mumbled.  Knowing he would say the lie eventually, he might as well avoid a beating if he could. 

‘That’s better darlin’.  Now get on the bed, I've had a really hard day.'  That was never good; Jeff in a bad mood was even rougher than normal and Jensen knew he'd be in agony by the morning.  Even so, he lifted his shaking limbs onto the bed and rolled onto his stomach.  Jeff climbed over him, letting his hands trail down Jensen's sides.  Jensen shuddered at the contact, even after all these years, he still hated the feel of those rough, unwanted fingers against his skin.  

'I saw you looking at him, did you want him, Jensen?  Did you want him to claim you like this?'  He shoved his cock deep into Jensen, unprepared, and Jensen howled at the intrusion, his body making no allowances; his wolf didn't see Jeff as his Alpha and wouldn’t let him in easily.  'I _saw_ you, Jensen.  Don’t you know yet that you're mine, that'll you'll never be his?  Please tell me you're not stupid enough to think he would ever want you.'  

Jeff kept pounding into Jensen regardless of the pained breaths the other man was choking out into the pillow clutched in his hands.  'Have you seen yourself?  Have you even looked in the mirror lately, Jensen?  You're not that pretty kid anymore, you're my whore and your beauty faded a long time ago.'  Jensen buried his head further into the pillow; he didn't _ever_ look in the mirror anymore, afraid of what he'd see, he knew Jeff was right, he had been stupid to even look at someone like Jared. 

'Used up and stupid and weak; that's all you are now, Jensen, even your own pack can't look at you.'  Jensen was crying now, tears of pain and humiliation, for what he had lost and what he had become, rolling down his face to be lost in the bedding with his  agonised cries.  It was true, no-one _would_ look at him anymore, and he had long since given up trying to catch their eyes, the shame he felt when they avoided his gaze was just too much to bear. 

'But I still want you, babe, I'll take you even when no-one else will have you, and you _still_ won't let me claim you?  Don’t you think that's selfish, Jensen, after everything I've given you?'  Jeff grunted at a particularly hard thrust and came, biting down hard on the back of Jensen's neck.  It was a mockery of a true mating as Jeff couldn't knot him, not until Jensen's wolf accepted him as his Alpha, and so Jeff just pulled out regardless of the wince exhibited from the man below him.  Jensen didn't answer his question, he never did.  

Inside, Jensen was scared his wolf was beginning to consider the possibility of submitting to the other wolf; it knew it would never find another mate to claim it and it craved a true mating after all the years alone with no affection other than harsh words and cruel touches.  Werewolves yearned for their other half and Jensen could feel his wolf starting to cave under the loneliness and the fear of the years of solitude that Jeff promised were in his future if Jeff tired of waiting for him.  

His wolf wanted the pain to end, the beatings to cease, it just wanted it all over.  Jensen’s human side could fight it all he wanted but the acceptance was down to his wolf and once his wolf submitted to Jeff, Jensen feared his human side would follow soon enough.  

'Get yourself cleaned up, we're eating with the pack tonight and I expect you to be at my side.'  Jeff got up and redressed, leaving Jensen alone on the bed still quietly crying into the pillow wondering what he'd done to deserve this fate.  
  
  



	2. Chapter Two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Two: David Cook – ‘I Did It For You.’ Since Jared is doing all of this for Jensen.

** Chapter Two. **

_Jared._  
  
'Jay, we can't just leave that guy there, didn’t you see the look in his eyes?  Jesus Christ, that's gonna give me nightmares for years.'  Chad commented as they walked back across their own border lines.  They had been silent on the trip back, running in their wolf forms, each lost in their own thoughts but assuredly all thinking about the same thing.

'I know, Chad, I know.'  Jared answered his Second, knowing that his friend spoke the truth; the image of Morgan’s hand on the back of Jensen’s neck kept flashing before his eyes no matter how hard Jared tried to push it away.  

Jared called a meeting of his guard to discuss the situation with Morgan's Pack.  Jared had also accepted wolves from the defeated Welling Pack four years ago.  They were the werewolves who had been unwilling to serve under the new Alpha and had been able to get away with their lives.  They would perhaps be able to give Jared a new insight into Morgan's plans.  

'I went to Morgan's Pack, today, to demand justice for our lost brethren.  Unfortunately, I had no evidence to accuse him with since his wolves left no scent and no one saw them cross our borders.  I regret that, now, I see no other option but war since Morgan seems more than willing to harm my pack without any provocation or cause.  I am planning an attack to take over his pack and bring the Alpha down.'  Jared heard the gasp ripple through his loyal men and women. 

'But, Alpha, you always said you never wanted a battle, that it would leave us vulnerable.'  A young blonde woman spoke up.

'I know, Katie, and I still don't _want_ a battle but I don't see that we have any other choice left to us.  I _know_ Morgan killed my wolves, even if I can't prove it; this has to end and I think that we have a clear advantage over him that I didn’t know about before.  From what I saw today, I'm willing to guess that there will be many within that pack willing to help us defeat Morgan.  They may follow his orders but I highly doubt the wolves from Welling's Pack have feel any real love for their new Alpha or his ways of running things.'  

It was unusual for one Head Alpha to attack another but Morgan had killed more Pack Alphas in the past twenty years than had been killed in the last four centuries and it was unsettling the balance of power in the werewolf world.  Packs rarely formed alliances but hostility between them was just as rare; they usually left each other alone and hunted in their own territories or in the neutral lands between them.  Morgan was disregarding all the unspoken rules and someone needed to stop him.  Jared, now, wanted that someone to be him.  

'You're right, Alpha,' Mike spoke up; he was one of the newer wolves to join the pack and swear his allegiance to Jared.  'I was a member of Tom's Pack and I saw the way Morgan took out our Alpha and the way he treated my friends.  I tried to fight, to stop him from taking over, but there were just too many of them.  When I saw what Morgan did to Jensen, I challenged the Alpha myself but he's strong and he plays dirty.  In the end, he had me cornered so I ran.  I know I'm a coward for leaving Jen behind the way I did but Morgan was going to rip me to shreds and I thought, at least, if I got away, then I could come back some day and help him.  I knew I couldn't do that if I was dead.'  He looked dropped his eyes to the floor and began wringing his hands nervously. 

Jared walked over to the distressed man and laid a comforting hand on his shoulder.  'You’re not a coward, Mike, you did the right thing and I’m sure Jensen wouldn't have thanked you for getting yourself killed over him.'  The man nodded and sat back down.  Jared made a note to ask the man more about what had happened to Jensen, later, when the pack had been dismissed.  First of all, they needed a plan and he had to make sure they were all agreed upon it.  'What can you tell me about Morgan's Pack?'

'I'm sure you're right about the remnants of Tom's Pack, Alpha, none of us wanted to become members of Morgan's Pack so you're going to have supporters there if we attack.'  Mike replied.

'I don't want a full blown battle, the death toll could be astronomical if it comes to that.  I just want Morgan, so if I can guarantee a load of wolves not joining to help him that'll mean far less blood shed on both sides.'  Everyone nodded, not one of them liked killing their fellow wolves even if it was war.  

'I will offer any wolf that wants it asylum in our pack, but I doubt many of Morgan's true followers will take it, they're blood thirsty and I doubt they’d be able to settle within our pack.  I'm sure they, at least, will challenge us when I confront Morgan so I'm not sure how many of them will live through the siege, but I will offer them the choice nonetheless when Morgan is dead.'  It was tradition for the triumphant Pack Alpha to offer the beaten pack members a place in their pack and Jared would never dismiss that, no matter how he didn't much like the tradition at that moment.  

'Right, we'll leave in two days.  Jacob, I want you to take our vulnerable wolves to the safe caves and make sure none of Morgan's wolves double back and attack them while we're not here.  You'll have Colin and Sarah with you which should be enough since no-one but the pack knows about the caves.  If you leave tonight, you should be there, easily, within the two days.  Don't return to the territory until one of our werewolves comes to get you and if they don't, you need to move on and try to find another pack; the Pileggi Pack would take you in, I think, so make for there.'  The three guards nodded and were dismissed to gather the supplies that would be needed for their journey and stay in the caves.

'Chris and Mike you'll come with me to find Morgan.  Chad you'll lead one team around the Eastern border, and David you'll lead another team around to the West.  Split up and move around in twos and threes, no more, and stay downwind as much as possible.'  None of this was news to the guard, they were all highly proficient in combat but Jared restated his expectations before every raid, it established his chain of command and ensured that all followed it.  

'We'll stay human until the last moment since our scents will be less obvious then. Take out Morgan's scouts as soon as the opportunity presents itself, try to leave as many alive as you can, but be discreet; I don't want a full on fight until we've been discovered.  If you're found, let out the signal and the rest of us will move in, otherwise stay under the radar as much as possible.'  He looked at his fighters, 'I reiterate, only kill those you feel you have to and only fight those who attack you or try to protect Morgan.  I want this as clean as we can make it.  Does everyone accept and agree with this plan?'

'What about Jensen, how are we going to get him out of there without him getting hurt?'  Chris asked, clearly worried about the youngster. 

'I'll find Jensen, I'm pretty sure that he won't be far from Morgan's side.'  Jared answered grimly.  From what he’d seen, he guessed that Morgan kept close tabs on Jensen at all times, not wanting anyone else touching what he felt was his.

'Who's Jensen?'  Katie asked.

'He's Morgan's Beta.'

'Then why on earth are we trying to help the bastard?'  Many of the wolves nodded as the very idea of swearing allegiance to a Head Alpha like Morgan, as well as sharing his bed, was abhorrent to most of them.  They'd all heard the  rumours about Morgan and none of them had been flattering to the Alpha.

'Because he's not his Beta by choice, Katie.'  The room fell silent at that.

'Alpha, you're not saying what I think you're saying, right?'

'Unfortunately, that's exactly what I'm saying,' Jared let out a sigh and continued, the tension intense amongst his fellow pack members.  'I'm going to get him out and bring him back to our pack.  Jensen will then have the choice to stay or leave after that but, at least, he won't be at the mercy of Morgan's Pack once Morgan is dead.'  He said it with a confidence that only the Head Alpha could exude, and the respect in the room was overwhelming.  'So are we all agreed?'

'Yes Alpha,' echoed around the meeting room and Jared nodded their dismissal and left for his own house.

Jared jogged up to Mike as the other wolf left to return to his own dwelling.  'Mike, could you join me at mine, please?'  Mike eyed him curiously but nodded and followed his Pack Alpha. 

Jared waved Mike to a seat in his office, when they reached his house, and sat down behind his own wooden desk. 

'What do you know about Jensen, Mike, you talked about him like he was a friend?'  Jared asked.

'Yes we were friends, Jared; we had been since we were kids.  We were close to Tom before he became Head Alpha and still close afterwards.  Us, and Alona, were pretty much inseparable when we were pups.  Jensen was a couple of years younger than all of us but it didn't really matter, we had some of the best times of my life together.'  He smiled to himself at the memory but it dimmed quickly once he resumed talking.  

'But when Morgan came he told Jensen he would let everyone live, unharmed and unmolested, if Jensen became his Beta.  Jen was only sixteen, and Tom's death had hit him hard, and he’d always had an overgrown sense of responsibility for the pack.  He was orphaned when he was seven when his parents died and our pack found him wondering in the woods.  The werewolves brought him home and gave him a family; he always felt like he owed us after that when, really, he had made up his debt to all us a long time ago.  Well, I suppose it was his Beta side showing through, as well, but he felt he needed to protect everyone so he just said yes.  

'Morgan took him back to his house and, my God, Jared, I'll never forget the screams those first few nights.'  Both men shivered at the thought.  'Anyway, a couple of days later, when Morgan came to talk to us about switching our allegiance to him, he had Jensen on his knees at his side with a silver collar around his neck and silver cuffs around his wrists.  The skin was raw and bloody and he looked so broken, Jay, he wasn't the wolf I knew anymore.  There were cuts all down his arms and bruises where he'd been h….held down,' Mike looked like he was going to be sick and, honestly, Jared was feeling a little green himself, 'He only wore a pair of pants and his chest was littered with bites and handprints, it was fucking awful, the ‘claiming’ had been brutal and we all knew it.  

‘Jen didn't raise his eyes off the ground, not once, not even when Morgan told us of his ‘claim’ on our friend.  We all knew it wasn't a true mating, no-one could smell the wolves' scents on each other.  I jumped at Morgan; I wanted to rip his throat out but two of his men grabbed me and pinned me down while Morgan laid into me.  The only thing that stopped him beating me to death right there was Jensen taking Morgan's hand and standing up to kiss him.  Morgan stopped and the two men holding me looked up with smug smiles at the display and I knew a distraction when I saw one and took off running.  I heard Jensen though, 'Please, Alpha, leave him, you promised.'  And surprisingly the bastard did.

'Jesus, I felt sick with guilt, but Jay, I promise, I _promise,_ there was nothing I could do for him then, not without getting myself killed and Jen punished for it.  But now you're giving me the chance to make it right and to be the friend to Jensen I wanted to be four years ago, not that I expect him to even be able to look at me after I abandoned him to that monster.  So thank you, Alpha.'  Mike ducked his head in deference to his Pack Alpha and Jared smiled.  Jared understood the feelings Mike felt for Jensen and he couldn't imagine how difficult it must have been for the man to leave his friend behind. 

'You're a good friend, Mike, don't doubt ever that and I'm sure Jensen doesn't blame you for anything.  I swear to you, I'll save him but I'm sure he'll need you when we bring him home.'  
  
  



	3. Chapter Three.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Three: Donnie Darko ‘Mad World. I think that sums up Jensen’s view of his life in this chapter.

**** ** Chapter Three.  
  
**

_ Jared. _

Jared had always known this fight was coming, in the back of his mind it was always there waiting for something to upend the balance.  It had been brewing for years and he just hoped his pack would withstand the inevitable fallout. 

Jared tried to convince himself that the turning point, the thing that finally swung his opinion in favour of war, was his new insights into Morgan’s Pack dynamics and the death of his wolves, but he knew deep down that that wasn't wholly true.  He wanted, he _needed_ , to save Jensen, he didn't know why but he would never sleep soundly again until he had.  Jared dreamt of bright green eyes filled with laughter instead of fear, full lips pulled into a smile and not a grimace and a long, lean body running through the forest rather than knelt, _cowed_ , at heel on the ground. 

Jared swore to himself that he would give Jensen everything he needed to see him strong again, even if his heart ached a little at the thought that Jensen may choose to leave in the end.  Jared hoped that the wolf would stay with his pack and he hoped even more that maybe he would stay with him. 

****

_ Jensen. _

Jensen awoke and felt a warm body pressed against his back and a hard line against his ass.  He tried to keep his breathing even, praying that Jeff would think he was still asleep.

'Little ironic for _you_ to be playing possum, babe.  You’re most definitely _not_ a blushing virgin anymore, are you?'  It wasn't really a question, and Jensen knew the answer anyway; he was dirty, dirty with grime that no amount of washing would ever get rid of.

'No.'  It hurt more than he could possibly say to admit that.  Jeff had taken something he had always planned on giving his mate.  Who would want him now, now that he had been tainted by another wolf?  He was weak and pathetic but he still couldn't get the other Alpha out of his mind.  Jensen had slept soundly, with no nightmares, for the first time in years, his head filled with kind hazel eyes and strong arms that would keep him safe. He didn't know what kind of wolf that Alpha was but he had to be better than Morgan.  Right?

'Well, you up for an early morning round before I go finish off the preparations for our big day?'  Again, not a question so Jensen just rolled over and took everything Jeff gave him, dreaming of a salvation that would never come and one that he wasn't even sure he deserved.

*****

The day of the wedding dawned cold and wet and Jensen would have laughed at how the weather seemed to mirror his mood if he hadn't been so terrified of what the day might bring.  He didn't know if the ceremony would kick start his wolf's instinct to accept Jeff as his mate, knowing that no other wolf would want him as their Beta once he was married to another. 

Jeff clearly thought it would, there was no other reason for the other man to go to all this trouble otherwise.  God, Jensen hoped it wouldn’t, he _really_ wasn't ready for that.  Even though he knew the beatings would lessen once he gave in, Jensen just didn't want to be at Jeff's side willingly.  Not after what he had done to Tom and the other werewolves that had died that day. 

Jensen saw his tuxedo laid out on the bed and the key to the cuffs and collar next to it.  He sighed in relief that, at least, he wouldn't be tethered today.  He hadn't had the silver off in years.  Jensen rushed to unlock the clasps and threw the cuffs and collar to the floor, eager to get the offending metal away from his skin.  He fell to his knees and almost cried; the constant burning around his neck and wrists was gone, he almost couldn't remember a time without the stinging sensation against his skin. 

'Oh, Sweetheart, that was disrespectful, you know I only have you wear them to keep you safe.'  Jensen jumped in surprise at hearing that hated voice behind him but managed to stay on his knees, not really knowing the right answer for that absurd comment.  'No one can smell my claim on you since you won't accept me, being the selfish whore that you are, so I need to make sure that no other wolves think you're fair game.  Although, I'm pretty damn sure they wouldn't look twice at you now, Jenny; an ugly, used up slut like you.' 

Jensen flinched more than he would have if Morgan had slapped him.  Christ, what would his parents think if they knew what a disgrace he was or how many times he'd rolled over for this man?  The whys didn't matter, there was just no excuse for what he had become nor for the things he had done.  He hated himself and God only knew what everyone else thought of him. 

Jensen just nodded and got dressed in the tuxedo.  Jeff shaved him, like he always did.  Jensen knew it was to show his control over Jensen, to have the younger man allow the razor so close to his bared neck.  Jeff tilting Jensen’s head back, in a fake gesture of submission, never failed to draw an aroused groan out of Jeff.  'Right, you're all ready, lovely, we're leaving in ten minutes so get your ass downstairs and wait for me by the door.'  He slapped Jensen on said ass as the younger man passed him on his way out of the bedroom.

*****

The ceremony went as planned; Jake, Jeff's Second in Command, lead Jensen up the aisle.  He stood a little too close and his grip was way too tight on Jensen's arm and it made him feel queasy.  The man was _always_ too close, pawing at him whenever Jeff wasn't looking, smelling him whenever they sat next to one another and he had even licked Jensen's neck once when Jeff had left them alone together. 

Jensen never said anything; he _so_ did not want to give the Pack Alpha any ideas of sharing him around his men.  And if Jeff was going to share Jensen with anyone, it would be Jake.  Jensen shuddered when he felt Jake come close to his ear and whisper, 'You know he'll get bored of you, sooner or later, and when he does your ass is mine, Pretty.'  Jensen paled and, for the first time ever, he almost hoped Jeff wouldn't get bored of him. 

Jeff beamed at him when Jensen reached the end of the aisle and took Jensen's hand in his own.  Jeff finished reciting his vows and Jensen knew he was only expected to say 'I do' since Jeff knew that he wouldn't be able to get through his own vows without crying.  Secretly, Jensen knew that he wouldn't either.  Jeff squeezed his hand so hard that Jensen felt the bones grind painfully together, he winced and opened his mouth, 'I...' 

A howl rent through the air and Jeff whirled round, dropping Jensen's hand.  He pushed Jensen at Jake who caught him around the waist.

'Watch him.'  Jeff barked and was off, shifting to his werewolf form as he ran.

‘With pleasure.'  Jake purred into Jensen's ear.  Jensen gulped and went with the other man.  
  
  



	4. Chapter Four.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Four: Bryan Adams – ‘Everything I Do (I Do It For You.) Everything Jared does in this chapter is for a certain green-eyed wolf, enough said.

** Chapter Four. **

_ Jared. _

Jared had heard Chad's signal and leapt across the boundaries, flanked by Chris and Mike.  'Mike, you go find anyone from Welling's Pack willing to stand with us, we could use them if we have to fight.'  Mike nodded and sped off.  Jared prowled up to Morgan's house as Chris followed behind him. 

'MORGAN.'  He yelled at the building. 

'Jay, you've interrupted my wedding and that really wasn't polite.  Jensen will be so upset.'  Jared could hear the smirk in Morgan's voice even before he laid eyes on the other Alpha. 

'Somehow I doubt that, Morgan.  Your Beta, and I use the term _very_ loosely, will be safe once you're dead.'

Jared didn't expect the laugh from his opponent.  'You want him, Jay, you want him to be your Beta?'  Jared bristled at the mocking tone since Jensen would make him proud as his Beta.  'He _is_ beautiful, the most beautiful wolf I've ever seen actually, I think, and definitely the sweetest ass I've ever had.  But he'll never believe you want him, Jay, he'll _never_ believe he's good enough to be your Beta.  I've trained him, you see, Jensen knows that his only place is with me and his only position is on his knees….or on his back, I suppose, I've had him _every_ way imaginable.  _Seriously,_ I have.'  Jeff winked at Jared as though they were sharing a private joke, as though Jared would find anything about the way the man had treated Jensen amusing.  

That was it; Jared tore forward and landed a solid punch to Morgan's jaw, wiping the smile off the other man's face.

Morgan brought his hand up to his mouth, wiping away some of the blood, before spitting on the ground.  Jared wondered, briefly, if Morgan was going to shift, the fight would no doubt be rougher in their lupine forms but he was really hoping the guy stayed human so he see Morgan’s smug face as Jared beat him to the ground.  

Morgan feigned a move to the right before charging into Jared’s left side, and despite being shorter and less muscular than Jared, Morgan still carried a strength not seen by many Alphas and managed to land a solid blow to Jared’s ribs.  They both went down in a mess of limbs before Jared managed to roll away and back up to his feet.  

They slowly circled each other for a while, throwing the occasional punch and kick, but Morgan was impatient, and that, in Jared’s opinion, would mean Morgan would always lose in a fight against him; impatience made a fighter cocky and careless.  Jared could wait out any opponent, relying on his stamina and adrenaline to keep him in the fight for as long as it took for his opponent to slip up.  

Jared could have laughed when Morgan charged him again, throwing two sloppy punches that Jared easily avoided before bringing his own knee up into Morgan’s stomach.  He heard the satisfying crunch of at least one broken rib and then used both hands to flip Morgan up over his shoulder and onto the floor.  The thud he elicited was nearly as satisfying as the bone cracking crunch, but not quite.  

Jared’s concentration was broken for just a moment by a pained cry from his left as he saw one of Morgan’s men bite into Chris’ neck before his comrade was able to head butt the assailant and land his own punches.  Jared breathed a sigh of relief that Chris clearly had the upper hand in that duel even if he was going to come away with a few  souvenirs from it.  

The click of a gun chamber was a bit of surprise though.

*****

_ Jensen. _

Jensen really didn't want to be alone with Jake and he felt stronger than he had in years.  The effects of the silver had almost worn off and the burns were already beginning to heal so he simply turned and punched the other man in the mouth and grabbed his head to knock it against the nearest tree.  Jake went down, out cold.

Jensen ran back to the pack to see what was going on and how he could help his friends if they needed him.  He didn't remember how to shift anymore, it had been too long, but he could fight as a human, he remembered how to do that at least.  Jensen heard the fight before he saw it and felt his wolf try to come to the surface but the pain that that caused shot through his body like a hot poker and he lurched forwards and threw up.  

The thought that he _couldn't_ shift, even without the silver hampering him, terrified him but he buried that fear down to deal with later and ran back to the camp. He saw Jared and Jeff fighting in front of Jeff's house (it would never be his and he never wanted it to be either) and drew in a breath when he saw Jeff pull out a gun.  That was against the law in lupine packs as they weren't allowed to use human weaponry against one another.  

Jensen didn't think Jeff could do anything to surprise him after all these years but it appeared he was wrong.  

Jensen set off at a sprint and slammed into Jeff, taking him down and rolling him away from the other wolves.  They grappled on the floor for a few moments before Jeff overpowered him.  The wolf was bigger and stronger than Jensen and Jensen knew it; in the beginning, he'd held Jensen down too many times for him not to have learnt that lesson.  He felt claws rip down his side and teeth at his neck.  Jensen let go with a cry of pain and Jeff shifted and sprinted away, obviously not liking his odds against the younger Pack Alpha so much anymore. 

'Jensen?  Jensen?'  Jensen distantly heard someone calling him but his head felt light and his side hurt that he couldn't be sure.  'Shit, Chris can you help him?'  He felt something sharp against his neck and a moment later the pain was receding and the world was falling away.

'You did great, Jen, just sleep, and I'll take you home with us to get you all patched up.'  Jensen thought he felt lips press against his forehead before he passed out but he was pretty sure he had imagined it.   
  
  



	5. Chapter Five.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Five: R.E.M. – ‘Everybody Hurts.’ Well, I chose this pretty much because Jensen hurts a lot in this fic (understatement, I know!) and I just needed him to hold on through all the pain and guilt, that he describes in this chapter, until Jared could come and save him.

** Chapter Five. **

_ Jensen. _

Jensen opened his eyes and shot up in the bed so fast that he fell out of it and onto the floor.  This wasn't Jeff's room, was it Jake's?  Was it one of the other wolves?  Pain flashed through his side as he tried to remember where he was and how he had gotten there. 

'Jensen, calm down, buddy, it's okay, you're alright.'  Jensen knew that voice, it was the gorgeous Alpha, was Jensen dreaming then?  'Come out, Jensen, come over here and we can get you back into bed.'  Jensen hadn't  realised , until then, that he had scurried under the bed in his confusion and peaked out, shyly, to look at the other man.  The Alpha was smiling kindly at him and he was even more handsome than Jensen remembered.  

This must be _his_ house, then, and Jensen must be a prize (not a particularly good one, Jensen thought, but there was no accounting for taste) for this Pack Alpha.  He climbed back onto the bed and rolled onto his stomach, ass in the air, and waited; it was the way Jeff had shown him to prepare himself in the early days.  Jensen wanted to cry but he was sure his new Alpha wouldn't like a whore that cried, Jeff certainly hadn't, and he had shown Jensen his displeasure more than once when it had happened.  

'Oh, no Jensen, that's not what you're here for.'  Jensen let out a sound of surprise and lurched backwards, curling up against the headboard, when he felt a gentle hand on his shoulder turning him over.  'Come on, buddy, you're just here to sleep, okay, you need to get better then you can decide if you want to join my pack or find one of your own.'  The man smiled again, a little more warily this time like Jensen was some crazy animal, well he guessed he was. 

'I'm sorry.'  Jensen croaked out, flushing bright red with embarrassment.  Of course this amazing Alpha wouldn't want him like that, he was so _stupid_ , hadn't Jeff told him enough times that he was worthless and that no-one would want him.  Jensen sniffed and turned his head into the bedding.

'Nothing to be sorry for Jen,' the man said, eyes sparkling.  No-one had called Jensen ‘Jen’ in years, not since he was young, not since he was still innocent.  It hurt to hear it now, he wasn't ‘Jen’ anymore, that boy died four years ago, but he wanted to be him so badly.  Jensen wanted to make the last four years a dream, some terrible nightmare, that would disappear when the sun came up, and Tom would be alive and laughing when Jensen walked out the door.  But he knew that wasn't to be, dreams were for fools anyway. 

'I'm Jared, by the way, the Alpha of the Padalecki Pack.'  He put out his hand to shake Jensen's but Jensen knew he wasn't allowed to touch other people so he just shook his head and drew his hands closer to his chest.  'You can shake my hand if you want to Jensen, Morgan's gone, he'll never bother you again, I promise.'  

Jeff couldn't be gone, he wouldn't leave without Jensen.  He had always said that Jensen would be his forever.  Jensen looked up at Jared in confusion, geez, the man was tall, he had inches on Jensen and Jensen was not a short man himself.  'He's been banished; he fled whilst we were taking care of you so our match wasn't finished.  But don't worry, he'll never get past our patrols, and hopefully one of the other Head Alphas will take him out for his crimes if they meet him in the wilderness.'  Jensen relaxed slightly.  

Jeff was gone.  

_ Jeff was gone.   _

What did that mean for him?

Was he free now?  Did he belong to Jared now?

'But what do I do now?'  He spoke, almost to himself, but the Alpha still answered.

'Anything you want, Jen, there are members of your old pack here and I'm sure they'll help you settle in if that's what you want.'  Jensen shook his head vehemently at that. 

'Nonono, they can't see me, I don't want them to see me, not like this.'  He'd avoided his former pack mates, as much as possible, back in Jeff's territory and he was thankful that they never really looked at him anyway now, not when Jeff was around.  But… but if he went to speak to them, they'd _have_ to look at him, then they'd see.  They'd see everything. 

'Like what Jen?'

'Like this!'  Jensen swept an arm down his body to make his point clear but the Alpha's eyebrows just drew together in a confused frown.  How could the Alpha not see it?  What he was?  Was he trying to humiliate Jensen by making him say it?  'I'm...I'm...'  And because he couldn't use his own words, he used the ones Jeff had thrown at him so often.  'I'm used up, I'm dirty, I can't...I can't look at them, knowing what I am.'  

Jared's mouth dropped open and he looked at a loss as to what to say to that.  Maybe he hadn't known Jensen was a whore before he got him away from Jeff, maybe he'd turn Jensen out now that he knew.  Jensen got up from the bed on shaky legs and drew the sheet with him to cover his almost naked body; he knew no-one wanted to see that, especially not the Greek God standing in front of him. 

'Jen, where are you going?'  The taller man asked, the same confused expression on his features.

'I'm leaving, you obviously didn't know what I was, I'm really sorry, I'll leave right away.'  Jensen whispered earnestly and he could feel the flush rising to his cheeks again; he really hadn’t intended on deceiving the Alpha the way he had.  

'No!'  Jared yelled and Jensen flinched back and hit his leg on the iron frame of the bed, hissing at the contact.  'Shit, sorry, you just surprised me.  You don't have to leave, Jensen.  I'm sorry I didn't say anything, I was just shocked.  You're not a whore.  Just because you shared Morgan's bed, that doesn't make you a whore.  It makes you abused, Jensen.'  He added quietly. 

Jensen chuckled darkly, years of bitterness flowing through him.  'You say that, Alpha, but you don't know how many times I rolled over to get what I wanted.  Whenever someone mouthed off or was out of line I just offered up my ass, _that_ distracted Jeff just fine, I'm pretty sure that's the definition of a whore, Alpha.'

'And what did you get out of it all, Jensen?'  Jensen looked at the Alpha liked he'd grown a second head.

'What are you talking about, I _already_ told you?'

'No, Jensen, I asked you what _you_ got out of it, did you get money, gifts, anything from Morgan for it?'  Jared asked him calmly.  

'What? No!  Of course not, what the hell are you talking about?  I'd never accept anything like that from Jeff.  I didn't want _any_ of that.'  Jensen had no idea where the Alpha was going with this, maybe he wasn't the only crazy wolf in the room. 

'So you allowed yourself to be raped to protect your friends?'  Jared carried on in the same infuriatingly calm tone he had used before.

'No, I…that's not....what are you…?'  Jensen shook his head, Jared was confusing him.  That wasn't what had happened.

'Jensen, you were raped so your friends would survive.  Mike told me about the deal you made when you were sixteen.'  Jared pushed further as Jensen held onto the frame of the bed to steady himself as he tried to make Jared understand. 

'No, no, you don't understand.  I had to, I wasn't... _that._ It wasn't _that_ because I agreed, I went with him.  Jeff…Jeff, he told me he was doing me a  favour …that no one else would want me after I'd failed, it was my fault...all my fault.'  Jensen hadn't admitted any of that out loud to anyone although Jeff had made sure to remind him of all his mistakes and flaws at every opportunity.

'What was your fault, Jensen?'  Jared questioned as if he didn’t know.  Like hell he didn’t, if he knew about the deal Jensen had made, he must have known about Jensen’s failures during the raid.  But Jensen would play along with whatever game this Alpha was playing, he was used to games after all these years.

'They…they got to the people I was supposed to be protecting.  Tom trusted me and I failed, I had to protect them, I _had_ to.'  Jensen added quietly.

****

_ Jared. _

Jensen looked so desperate that Jared just didn't know what to do or what to say to make the other wolf see the truth.  The wolf's perceptions of the facts were so warped, Jared wasn't even sure he would be _able_ to help him, no matter how much he wanted to. 

'No, Jensen, that's not right.'  He took the smaller werewolf's shaking hands in his own and, despite the slight flinch he felt, he held on, pulling the wolf down to sit beside him on the bed.  'You did your best, you didn't fail.'

'But…'

'No, Jensen, you didn't fail.'  Jared repeated with a little more force this time.

'I did, I promised to keep them safe.'  Jensen whispered and Jared could see his eyes were wet even as Jensen turned his face away from him.

'And you did Jensen, you did.'  Jensen wouldn't look Jared in the eye.  Jared wasn't sure whether he should do this or not, but werewolves were very tactile and he yearned to pull the younger wolf into his arms, so he did.  He felt the smaller body tense against his own.  Jared  realised , a little too late, that Jensen was only in his boxers and probably felt very uncomfortable at the contact.  He still held on, though, until he felt the younger wolf relax against his body.  

'It's alright, Jensen, your pack loves you.  I've talked to them, they love you so much and they've missed you.'  Jared felt Jensen shaking his head against his shoulder.  Jared just held him tighter.  They sat like that for a long time until Jared felt Jensen’s breathing even out  signalling that he'd fallen asleep again.  The wound on his side hadn't been too bad but the burns and abrasions, all over the rest of his body, had had some healing to do.  

Jared was loathe to leave the sleeping man alone but he needed to speak to Mike and Alona as soon as possible.  Jared asked Chris to watch Jensen in case he woke up before he returned.  
  
  



	6. Chapter Six.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Six: The Pretenders- ‘I’ll Stand By You.’ I thought this was perfect for the vulnerable Jensen in this chapter and expressed how much Jared wants to protect him and won’t ever give up until he makes Jensen whole again.

** Chapter Six. **

  
_ Jared. _

'He's going to really need your help; I've never heard anything like it.'  Jared began, shaking his head at the memory of his and Jensen’s earlier conversation.

'What did he say, is he okay?'  Mike asked tentatively, probably already expecting the answer Jared was going to give to that question.  Mike had left the pack four years ago which was long before Jensen had endured the worst of the abuse he was to suffer at Morgan's hands but he had heard the rumours about what Jensen had gone through in that time. 

'He's not okay, Mike, and he hasn't been okay for years. You wouldn't believe it if you saw him.'  Alona whispered to her friend. 

'He thinks it's all his fault.  He thinks he failed in protecting your pack that day and all this…this is some sort of penance for that failure.  Like he deserved it for letting you all down.'  Jared told the two wolves in front of him. 

'Well, that's bullshit, we were all there that day, we were overwhelmed and Tom's death hit us all hard.'  Mike protested hotly as if Jared was blaming Jensen as well for what had happened which just couldn’t be further from the truth.

'I’m just telling you what Jensen seems to think.  He thinks he's a whore and, I think, Jeff convinced him that no one would ever have wanted him, even before all this happened, and now he thinks that no one ever will.'  Jared shook his head, staring at his hands and remembering both what Jensen and Morgan had said to him. 

'That's a load of crap, half the men and women from our pack wanted to mate with Jensen but the guy just never noticed.  They were all waiting till he turned eighteen.'  Jared wasn't at all surprised at that as Jensen was certainly breathtaking to look at and, from his actions, Jared could tell he was one of the most loyal werewolves he'd ever met.  'He was all easy smiles that made the girls melt and tight muscles that made the guys' mouths water.  Everybody loved him; he was kind of the golden boy of the pack ever since the day he was found.'  Mike smiled wistfully at his memories. 

'He doesn't see it, Mike, he just doesn't see it.  He's had four years of being told he's worthless and that no one wants him, he thinks he's only good for one thing.'  Jared looked at Mike and Alona wondering whether or not he should tell him the next part but, in the end, he felt full disclosure would probably help Jensen more than keeping secrets about his suffering.  Plus, the two people in front of him had been Jensen’s best friends, Jared knew they wouldn’t judge him.  'When he first woke up he just rolled over on the bed and made it clear what he thought I wanted.'  The two looked at each other and grimaced.  'So you guys need to show him he's still the same wolf that he was when he was sixteen.'

'But, Alpha, he's _not_.  He’s different, I've seen him change so much over the years.'  Alona told the older wolf.

'Well we'll just have to see about finding that Jensen again then won't we.'  Jared countered.

****

_ Jensen. _

Four days later and Jensen was finally well enough to get out of bed. 

The burns on his neck and wrists were almost gone for the first time in four years and his side had healed enough for him to move about without much pain.  Jensen didn't know what to do; was he allowed to go outside without the Alpha?  Was he allowed to get dressed?  What was he supposed to wear?  

He was sitting on the bed in his boxers when the Pack Alpha walked in.  Jensen grabbed a blanket and threw it round himself.  

****

_ Jared. _

Jared shook his head sadly; it was odd for wolves to be ashamed of their form since half the time they were naked anyway.  Morgan had _really_ done a number on Jensen, the sadistic bastard. 

'Good Morning, Jen, are you ready for a tour of the territory today?  Misha says you're all healed up and as long as we're not out too long you should be fine.'  He smiled brightly at the younger wolf but Jensen didn't answer and his leg was jiggling up and down nervously.  'Jen?'

'I…what do I wear?  Do you have a leash?'  Jared stopped Jensen's leg moving with a gentle hand on his knee.  

'Jensen.  You remember where you are, right?  Here, with my pack, you're a free man, you can go wherever you like, wear what you like, and you most certainly do _not_ need a leash.  You don't even have to stay with me if you don't want to, but I usually escort new wolves around the territory the first time, it's just something I like to do.  But I can get Mike or Alona to take you if you want.’ 

'NO, NO!  Please Alpha, please take me with you.'  Jensen grabbed at the Jared's hand tightly and dropped again quickly when he realised what he’d just done.

'Okay, Jensen, it's alright, you won't have to do anything you don't want to.  There are clothes in the wardrobe; they're all your size and I'll see you outside the house in about ten minutes?'  Jared said calmly, turning to walk from the room.

****

_ Jensen. _

Jensen nodded mutely at the Alpha and watched him leave.  He walked over to the wardrobe and looked at the clothes inside.  He grabbed a green shirt since Jeff had always told him to wear green, and a pair of dark blue jeans.  Jensen walked down the stairs but halted at the door.  He hadn't been outside on his own in years but Jared had said it was alright and the other man had been nothing but nice since the moment they’d met.  He pulled open the door and was met with Jared's smiling face, 'You ready?'  Jensen nodded, not sure if it was the truth or not.  

Jared took Jensen by the hand and as Jensen saw the other wolves look up at him and the Alpha he tucked himself closer into Jared's side.  He made sure not to touch Jared's large body but was still able to hide himself from most of the curious eyes around the town.  

****

_ Jared. _

'JENSEN!'  Jensen looked up at the call of his name and shied away when he saw Mike running towards him.  Mike pulled up short at his friend's reaction.  'Hi Jen, I'm, uh, glad you're here.'  He stayed back and waited for Jensen to raise his head and meet his eyes.  He didn't.  'Jensen, you know we're all so proud of you for what you did and we love you.  We're still family, just like we always were.'  Jensen shook his head and squeezed Jared's hand harder.  

Mike moved in slowly and gently took Jensen's chin in his hand and raised his head to make him look in his eyes.  He swallowed a gasp at the haunted look he found there, so out of place in his young twenty year old friend's eyes.  Jared wondered if Mike could see the guilt, the self-loathing, in their depths that Jared could see when Jensen looked at him.  He wondered if Mike felt as angry as he did knowing how much those emotions didn't belong there.  

Jared watched Mike paste a bright smile on his face and hold his friend's gaze until the green eyes flitted away again.  Mike looked up at Jared, worriedly, but Jared merely shrugged.  It was a step; Mike had said what needed to be said and Jared only hoped some of it translated through to the wolf at his side.  

'Thanks, Mike, I'm just gonna show Jensen the rest of the territory, maybe you could join us for dinner at mine tonight?  Would that be alright with you, Jensen?' The blonde nodded and Jared threw Mike a wide smile.  'Right we'll see you around eight?'

'Sure, Alpha, looking forward to it.'  Mike bounded off and Jared watched the other wolf go.  He continued to show Jensen the rest of his land, pointing out all the amenities and leisure facilities that they had built.  'You can go wherever you want to, Jensen, and I'm sure the other wolves would be more than happy to show you anything you might wanna see.  

‘You can go hunting whenever you like and shift at any time but I'd like you to steer clear of the other pack territories for the time being.  We try to keep clear of other territories in general, anyway, but Morgan’s caused more than a little unrest and the other packs are more territorial than they used to be right now.'  He felt Jensen tense at his old Alpha's name and knew that it would be a long time before the other man would be able to talk about his tormentor without discomfort, if ever.

'Right, I think that's enough for today, you're not quite done healing just yet.  We'll go back and get supper ready for Mike okay?'  Jensen nodded again. 

****

'Um, where do you keep everything, Alpha, and what do you want me to make?  I can make pretty much anything.  It might not be any good but...'  Jared stopped Jensen with a hand on his shoulder. 

'Jen, you're not here to cook for me.'  Jensen shifted from one foot to the other nervously.  Jared noticed Jensen's restlessness and, though he would rather have cooked for the healing man, he decided that probably wouldn't be the best idea for Jensen this soon out of his confinement.  'How about we make something together?  I fancy lasagna, that good with you?'  Jensen looked so puzzled, and Jared didn't know whether it was because Jared was going to help or whether it was because he had actually asked Jensen for his opinion on what they were going to have.  Either way, it broke his heart to see.  

Finally, Jensen nodded and waited for Jared to get all the ingredients set up.  Then Jared stepped back and watched Jensen move round the kitchen; he looked more confident here than Jared had seen him since they rescued him and Jared could hear him humming Metallica quietly to himself.  

Jared soon realised that he had been doing more watching than helping and moved up behind Jensen to ask what he could do.  As soon as Jensen felt Jared behind him, he dropped the plate of cheese he was holding and it smashed on the floor sending cheese flying everywhere.  Jared was about to laugh at the mess they'd made; Jared wasn’t a tidy cook, he always used every single pan he owned and ended up with more food on the surfaces than in the bowls.  

But he stopped himself when Jensen dove to the floor grabbing jagged pieces of china roughly from the floor in an effort to clean up the shards, cutting his hands up in the process. 

'Oh my God, I'm so sorry, Alpha, I'm such a klutz, I'm so sorry, I'll go out and get more.  Please, I'm so sorry...'  He kept going until Jared had the presence of mind to crouch down next to him and grab his hands to stop him from cutting them open any more on the sharp ceramic edges. 

'Jen, it's okay, it's alright.'  Jared said softly and when he stood up he brought Jensen up with him.  'Right, you need to sit down at the table, so I can have a look at your hands okay.'  Jensen looked down at his hands as if he didn't understand what Jared meant.  When he saw the cuts he just whispered, biting his lip, 'I'm sorry.'  To Jared, he looked moments away from tears.

'Jensen, you never have to  apologise for an accident and you certainly never have to apologise for hurting yourself, I would just rather you didn’t do it because I don't like to see you hurt.  Just stay there and I'll get the first aid kit and we'll have you right as rain in no time?'  Jared squeezed Jensen's arm reassuringly, Jensen just nodded.  

Jared left the room and walked to his en-suite on the second floor. 'Shit!'  He whispered as he opened his bathroom cabinet, if he ever saw Morgan again he was going to rip him to shreds.  Jared didn't know where it came from but he felt so protective of the younger wolf and it had pulled at his heart to see him apologise over and over again like that, slitting his hands open in a desperate attempt to clean up.  He ran a hand through his long hair and grabbed the first aid kit. 

Jared walked back to the kitchen to see Jensen sitting in the exact same position he had left him in, his palms still turned upwards where Jared had examined them.  Blood was leaking all over the table; the cuts looked deep and had to hurt like hell but Jensen seemed more upset about the cheese than the cuts, still staring at the broken china on the floor.  That really didn't bode well for the state of the man's self-esteem in Jared's opinion if he cared more about a cheap plate than his own well being. 

'Okay, I'm back, this is going to sting a little, sorry.'  Jensen didn't even react when Jared put on the antiseptic.  Jared wanted to stitch up the wounds but he really didn't want to cause Jensen any more pain.  Besides, the wounds should heal themselves in a couple of days, Jensen being a werewolf and all, so he just bandaged them up to help ward off any infection.  

'You're good to go, Jen.  How about I clear this up and you grab some more cheese from the fridge and we finish this baby off.'  Jensen nodded dumbly and walked to the fridge to fetch the cheese and began grating it at the table while Jared carefully picked up the shards of china off the floor and threw them away.  He cleaned up the cheese and took the new plate of grated cheddar from the other man. 

'Thanks.'  He sprinkled a good few handfuls of cheese over the top of the pasta sheets and put the dish into the pre-heated oven and set the timer.  

'Right, we're all set here.  Jensen can you come into the other room with me please.'  It wasn't a request and he was glad that Jensen didn't take it as one.  Jensen followed him as Jared walked into the living room and sat down on the couch gesturing for Jensen to sit down as well.  Jensen sat as far as physically possible from Jared, looking down guiltily at his hands.  

‘Okay, Jen, we need to talk about what just happened in the kitchen.'  He let a little of his Alpha tone slip into his voice, making sure Jensen knew that not talking about this was not an option. 

'I'm sorry, Alpha, I’m just so clumsy and you startled me.'  His eyes widened, 'Not that it was your fault, I just get lost in my own head sometimes, it won't happen again, I'm sor..'

'Jensen, stop!'  Jensen's rambling stopped instantly.  'I'm not mad about the cheese, God, I drop stuff all the time.  It was an accident, Jen, you know that right?'  Jensen didn't answer just kept looking at his now shaking hands.  'We all have accidents, and you're not clumsy.  It was my fault, I shouldn't have walked up behind you like that and I'm sorry.'  Jensen's head whipped up at that.

'No Alpha it was my fault, _please_...'  Jensen started, his green eyes wide and pleading.

'No, Jensen, it was _not_ your fault.  It was _my_ fault.'  The Alpha's tone became authoritative and Jensen dropped his head and nodded, no-one argued with their Pack Alpha when they spoke like that.  'I need you to know that it's alright to make mistakes, Jensen, that's how we learn, and you need to stop  apologising for every little thing that happens, it's not expected and it's definitely not necessary for me.  But I also need to know why you apologised for cutting yourself?'  

Jensen looked away and didn't answer.  'Jensen?'  There was a slight warning in his tone that no werewolf could miss, let alone a Beta.

'I…I...Jeff didn't like it when I got myself hurt, it wasn't allowed.'  He whispered.  Well that didn't compute with what Jared had seen of Jensen, there were marks all over him; the burns from the silver alone had taken days to heal, far longer than most wolf wounds would have.  Jensen answered Jared's question when he spoke again.  'I was Jeff's to mark, no other marks were permitted.'  Jared shivered in disgust and Morgan was just lucky he was far away from him right now.  

'Well, Jensen, while I don't want you hurt, you don't have to apologise for any scraps you might get, okay, we all have our tumbles living the way we do, just make sure you take care of them when you do hurt yourself.'  Jensen nodded again.  

Jared heard the knock at the door and Jensen shot up to answer it then looked at Jared uncertainly.  It was Jared's house after all but it looked like Jensen was so used to doing everything that he really didn't know what he could do and what he couldn't anymore.  'You can answer my door, Jen, it's fine.'  Jared sighed as Jensen left the room.  He really didn't know what he was going to do with the young werewolf, he just knew he couldn’t give up, he wouldn’t. 

Mike walked in, holding a twelve pack under his arm, and grinned when he saw Jared on the couch.  'Hey Jay, is that lasagna I smell?'  Jared had all of his pack call him Jared in his house; ‘Alpha’ was kept for pack business or out in the territory.   In private, he had always preferred to just be called Jared.  

'It most certainly is, Mike, Jensen pretty much made it all by himself.  I was _really_ good at supervising.  It smells awesome.'  Jensen blushed at the compliment and Jared didn't think he'd ever seen anything more adorable.  With an effort, he tore his eyes away from the charming Beta and back to Mike to find the man smirking at him.  'I'll take the beer and put it in the fridge, I've got a few cold ones to tide us over till this stuff cools down.'  

Jensen jumped up at the sound of the oven alarm and ran into the kitchen to take out his creation.  By the time he and Mike had caught up, Jensen had plated up three lots of lasagna, although his portion was a third of the size of the other two.  There were, also, only two open beers by the plates.  

'Oh, I was going to bring it in for you.'  Jensen told them, looking down at the plates anxiously.

'No need, Jen, how about you grab yourself another spoonful of pasta there?  There's plenty to go around.'  

'Oh no, I can't.'  Jared narrowed his eyes at the Beta wondering what _this_ was about.

'Jen, really, you look like you could use a little fattening up.'  Jared winked at the Beta, trying to keep his advice light hearted.  It was true, the Beta much thinner than he should be, Jared had seen Jensen’s ribs in starker definition than he had liked the other day in the bedroom. 

Jensen paled, ran his hand across the back of his neck and put his plate down on the counter and went to leave the kitchen.  Jared nodded for Mike to go into the other room and start his dinner as he grabbed Jensen's arm to stop him leaving.

'Hey, Jen, why are not taking your dinner in with us?'  Jensen looked confused at that.  Jared didn't understand how his comment could lead to the exact opposite of what he had wanted to happen. 

'I thought you were making a point.'  Jensen replied, not meeting Jared’s eyes, his gaze once again focused on the kitchen floor.

'About what?'  Jared _had_ been making a point, he wanted Jensen to put on a few pounds, but that's what he'd said, right?  Clearly that wasn't what Jensen had heard though.

'That...that I'm carrying too many extra pounds for a werewolf.  You're right, I shouldn't eat lasagna anyway, looking the way I do.'  Whenever Jared thought he couldn’t hate Morgan any more than he already did, Jensen said or did something that proved him wrong.  Had Jensen not _looked_ in a mirror lately, or you know _ever_?  He was easily the best looking man Jared had ever seen, all this was just crazy. 

He sighed, 'Jen, pick up the lasagna.  I wasn't making fun of you; I honestly think you need to eat a little more than you do.'  Jensen made a disbelieving sound.  'Alright Jen, we're going to go upstairs for a minute so I can show you something.'  Jared put the remaining lasagna and their dishes in the still warm oven.  

Jared took Jensen's hand and pulled him along after him towards the stairs.  'Mike, can you put the DVD in and get it started, Jen and I will be there in a few minutes.'  Mike nodded and picked up the movie Jared had picked out.  

On reaching the top of the stairs, Jared led Jensen into his bedroom.  'I know this is going to make you uncomfortable, Jensen, but I want you to take your shirt off for me.'  Jensen hesitated then followed the Alpha's wishes but held the thin fabric close to his chest, covering as much of his body as possible.  Jared reached out to take the shirt away but Jensen's fingers just tangled tighter in the fabric.  'Come on, Jen.'  He said softly.  

Jensen let go and crossed his arms around his body.  That was fine, Jared could work with that.  He led Jensen over to his full length mirror in the corner of his room and told Jensen to look at himself in it.  It took a few long moments for Jensen to open his tightly scrunched up eyes but eventually, Jensen looked. 

‘Okay,' he moved Jensen's arms down to his sides and traced the outline of Jensen's ribs with his finger, 'you see this, Jen, this isn't right.'  He took Jensen's hand and traced his obvious ribs with it.  Jared stripped off his own shirt and took Jensen's hand and rubbed it down his own side where there were no rib indentations.  'This is what it should look like.'  Jensen made a self-deprecating noise that Jared really didn't like, but he let it go for now.

Jensen turned around and looked at Jared.  He continued to trace Jared’s side lightly with his fingertips.  'You are so beautiful.'  He whispered, almost to himself.  

Jared lifted Jensen's chin to look him in the eye, 'So are you, Jen, so beautiful.'  The harsh shake of Jensen's head broke his heart.  Jensen stepped away letting his hand fall.  Jared hoped he'd made his point but he doubted it would make much of an impression just yet so he would just have to keep on making it until Jensen believed him.  Jared picked up his own shirt and shrugged it back on and handed Jensen his own back.  'Alright, let's go join Mike and watch that DVD.'  

He took Jensen by the hand, gradually getting the man used to non-sexual casual touches again, and sat him down on the couch once they were back downstairs.  Jared went back into the kitchen and put another spoonful of lasagna onto Jensen's plate and brought them both out with two beers.  'Here you go.'  He held the plate and the beer out to Jensen,

'Oh no, I'm not allowed to drink.'  Jensen bit his lip looking at the beer Jared was holding out to him.

'You can if you want, Jen and if you don't, then there's OJ in the fridge.'  Jensen nodded, took a deep breath and took the beer.  Jared watched Jensen tilt his head back and take a drink from the bottle.  When Jensen put the beer back on the table, he turned to Jared.

'What?'  Only then did Jared realise he'd been staring at the younger wolf.  

'Nothing.'  Jared said quickly, the man really didn't need Jared hitting on him right now, no matter how much Jared wanted to.  They both turned back to the screen; Jared had chosen a comedy, so no violence and no romance, he thought that it was probably the best choice for Jensen. 

Jared and Mike laughed loudly and made comments throughout the film and Jared was pleased to see Jensen's lips turn up every now and again as well even if he remained silent.  Jared subtly moved closer to Jensen during the film and, by the end of it, Jensen was asleep on his shoulder, snuggled into Jared's side, unconsciously seeking the warmth of another body in a way that he would never have allowed himself to if he had been awake.  

'So, Jay, how's it going?'  Mike asked before taking another swig of his beer.

'I don't know, Mike.'  He looked at the man at his side and stroked a hand through Jensen’s short, dark blonde hair.  'We had a little incident in the kitchen earlier.  Jen broke a plate and he started apologising like he had just ended the world or something and he was cutting up his hands trying to pick up all the shards.  God, it was awful, Mike.  And, earlier, when I told him to get more lasagna, he thought I was fucking kidding.  Jesus, who does that to someone, really?'

'I know, Jay, but Morgan was an evil son of a bitch and he worked real hard to wear Jen down.  But if there's anyone who can bring him back from this, it's you.'

'I hope so Mike.'  He brushed a stray hair off Jensen's forehead, 'I just want to make him happy again, ya know.'  Mike just smiled and nodded. 

'Well I better be going, Jared, Sandy's not gonna be too happy if I'm back after midnight and, believe me, for someone so tiny she packs one hell of a punch.'  Jared chuckled, he and Sandy had been friends since they were pups and, yeah, he knew she hit a lot harder than she looked like she could. 

'See you later, Mike, and thanks for coming over tonight.'

'It's cool Jay, and, just remember these things take time but we'll get him back, I know it.'  With that, Mike walked out into the night.  

Jared turned and watched the sleeping man on the couch for a moment; he looked so peaceful now, no frown marring his stunning face, no worried look in his eyes, he looked truly at ease for once.  Jared picked up the smaller wolf, unable to stop himself from breathing in the other man’s scent, and put him to bed in the guest room.  He leaned down and kissed the man's brow before leaving for his own bed.  
  
  



	7. Chapter Seven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Seven: Matt Nathanson- ‘Illusions.’ I thought this was kind of perfect for how Jared might think of Jensen and how he wants to be there for him.

** Chapter Seven. **

_ Jared. _

Jensen was in the kitchen singing quietly to himself.  The young man's voice was deep and smooth and Jared really didn't want to stop it but he felt wrong just watching when Jensen was unaware of his presence.  He made sure to scuff his shoes on the floor as he entered the room; Jensen clearly didn't like to be surprised, he liked to hear what was coming.  Jensen froze as soon as he heard the sound and sniffed the air before relaxing and turning around with a hesitant smile on his face.  

'Alpha, I didn't know where you were so I made breakfast.  I, um, didn't know what you wanted so I made everything.'  Jared raised an eyebrow as Jensen pointed to the oven.  He opened the door to find a stack of pancakes, eggs and bacon and warm rolls sitting inside.  Add that to the waffles Jensen was currently making and they had a feast.

'This is great, Jen, but you really didn't need to do all this.'  He smiled down at the younger wolf.  Jensen’s own smile faltered and Jared mentally kicked himself for causing it. 

'I, uh, I wanted to do it for you.  If it's not right, I could...I just...next time, maybe you could tell me the night before so I can get it right. I'm sorr..'

‘No, Jen, you have nothing to be sorry for, that came out all wrong.  You've done nothing wrong, as I said, this is fantastic but we only really need one thing for breakfast.  Next time, you make whatever you want to have and I'll just have whatever you had okay?'  Jared suggested.  That seemed to be a pretty logical way of working things, since it meant Jensen could still cook like he wanted to, or felt he needed to, but also meant Jensen had to make a choice about what _he_ wanted as well.

'But what if...'

'Whatever you want is fine, Jen.'  He wanted to tell Jensen that he didn't ever have to make breakfast for him, that he should just make his own, but Jensen really did appear to like cooking so Jared was happy to let him do it whenever possible.  Jensen was so relaxed in the kitchen that Jared felt he would be doing more harm than good taking that away from him. 

'Okay.  What do you want first?'  Jensen grinned at him again and everything was right in Jared's world.  

****

They had a few good days after that.  Jensen didn't leave the house but he and Jared made and ate all their meals together and Jensen had even started talking more.  If they were watching a movie, Jensen would comment on what was going on and he even shouted at a bad referee call once when they’d been watching a football game together.  

Still, Jared thought it was time to get Jensen outside again, after all Jensen was a werewolf and he, himself, was starting to get a little cabin fever from staying inside so long.  From what Jared understood, Jensen had spent most of his time indoors when he was with the Morgan Pack but his natural wolf instincts must have been making him restless, especially with his new found freedom in Jared's Pack. 

'How about we go out for a picnic today, Jen?'  At Jensen's apprehensive look he added, 'It's a really secluded spot, we won't have to see anyone but we could get some fresh air and get out into the woods for a bit.'

Jensen brightened at that and smiled at Jared, causing Jared’s heart to skip a beat.  Jared sighed internally, that smile was going to be the death of him.  ‘Sure Alpha, that sounds great.'  Jensen went into the kitchen and started to pack up some lunch supplies while Jared went to grab a couple of blankets from his room. 

'All good to go?'  Jared asked when he came back down.

'Yep, Alpha, good to go.'  Jared hadn't managed to get Jensen to call him Jared yet but he was sure he would in time.  He could already see the younger man coming out of his shell more and more at the small acts of kindness he saw in Jared's house.  

Jared took them to one of the lakes about ten miles from the pack boundary.  It was free territory and it was one of his favourite places to go when he needed time to think.  He left Chad in charge of the pack whilst he was gone and they weren't far, especially in wolf form, if something happened.  

There was a waterfall cascading into the lake and the sunlight shone off the vast, open water like mirrored glass. 

'Alpha, this is beautiful.  I've never seen anything like it.'  Jensen said in awe.

'I've been coming here since I was a kid; it's a great place to think.'  They sat down on the bank on the blankets and opened the basket.  

Having eaten their sandwiches they laid back and stared at the vast blue sky streaked with  wispy, white clouds. 

'There was this waterhole when we were young, and Mike, Tom, Alona and I spent so much freaking time there.  It was like our own little world, no-one else ever came out there, I'm not sure if anyone else even knew it was there.  One day, a wolf from another pack came along and was circling Alona; she was seventeen, I think, and the guy was thinking about trying to mate with her.  As soon as he came close enough, he kind of leapt at her and she just brought up her hand and punched him in the nose.  He was so stunned that he stumbled back and fell into the lake.  

‘We were laughing so hard, the guy turned bright red and ran back off into the woods.  She always was a firecracker and just because she was a Beta didn't mean she wasn't kickass.  I think the guy learned a lesson about Betas that day.'  Jared chuckled, he had gotten to know Alona over the last couple of weeks and a push over she certainly was not.  Jensen rarely talked about his past, but when he did, Jared could hear the happiness in voice, remembering the better times of his childhood. 

'God, you guys sound like me.  Sandy and I used to come up here all the time and hang out just to get away from everything.  _Everyone_ , including our parents, expected us to mate but it was never like that with us.' 

Jensen turned on his side to look at Jared, 'Why not?'

Jared shrugged, 'She was my best friend, more like a sister really, and we just didn't feel it.'

'Feel what?'

'That bond that mates feel.'  Jensen looked confused so Jared continued, a smile forming on his face as he spoke.  'It's like electricity.  It's like when you see your mate, your _one_ , a spark passes up your spine and your whole body is on fire just to touch them, to be close to them.'

'Wow, that sounds amazing.  You sound like you know from experience, who is it, have I met them?'  Jensen asked, still looking at Jared.

Jared’s smile grew, 'Yeah, you know them Jensen.'  He didn't mention that it was Jensen that made him feel like that, clearly Jensen hadn't felt the bond yet and Jared wasn't going to push him.  

'God, they must be really special if they're your mate.'  Jensen settled back with his arms behind his head acting as a pillow. 'Wait, why haven't you mated yet then, if you know who it is?'

'Because they're not ready so I'm giving them time to get used to the idea first.' 

Jensen laughed, incredulous.  'Any wolf would be lucky to have you as their Alpha, I'm pretty sure they won't need time to think about it.'

'Perhaps, but I don't want to ruin this and I don't mind waiting.  I'll wait forever if I have to.'  Jared said earnestly. 

Jensen just smiled and closed his eyes, letting the sun fall on his face.  Jared knew that Jensen didn't know he was the wolf Jared was talking about but he hoped he conveyed the view of matings in his pack; that they were mutual acts of love and friendship and never forced.  He felt he had.  

****

Jared woke Jensen up with a splash of water onto his face.  'Hey!'  Jensen spluttered.

'Come on in Jen, the water's great.'  He called.

'I…I didn't bring any shorts.'  Jensen stuttered back, clearly reluctant to come into the lake with Jared and Jared knew why.

'Under the blankets, I brought you a pair of mine.'  He had been prepared for all manner of excuses that Jensen would drum up for not being able to go swimming.

'Um.'  Jensen fidgeted from one foot to the other holding the shorts in his hand.  'Okay?'

'You can change behind those bushes over there.'  Jared called out before diving under the water again.  Jensen walked off and ten minutes later came back in the shorts, still wearing his T-shirt and holding his jeans in front of him.  He carefully put the jeans down and made his way over to the water. 

'Jen, you need to lose the shirt, dude.'  Jared knew Jensen was self-conscious but Jared needed to get him at ease with his own body again, as slowly as was necessary, and since they were the only ones here Jared thought it was a good time to start. 

'But I…'  Jensen shook his head and rubbed a hand across the back of his neck, a nervous habit earned from wearing a silver collar for so many years, Jared assumed.  

'Well, I suppose you could wear it but then it’ll be wet when we go back to the territory and you’ll have to walk shirtless to the house.  Your choice though.'  Jared knew it was a little mean but he needed Jensen to be with him on this one if they were going to move forward.  Hesitantly, Jensen grabbed the hem of his T-shirt, looked around quickly, and pulled it over his head, dropping it to the floor next to his jeans. 

Jared's breath caught in his throat, three square meals a day and time in Jared's home gym had done wonders for Jensen's physique.  He had been in great shape when he had come to stay with Jared but now his ribs were less pronounced and arms had begun to fill out with some much needed pounds.  Jensen walked quickly into the water finding a place where he could stand but which only left his head above the surface. 

Jared wasn't sure how to go about this, had it been Sandy or Chad he would've just tackled them under the water but he didn't think Jensen would react well to that.  He was, therefore, shocked when Jensen went under the water and came up again to splash him in the face.  Jared went from stunned to elated when he saw the mischievous look in Jensen's eyes and the water fight that ensued left them both breathless and laughing.  

They got out of the water and sat on the bank; Jensen rapidly dried himself off, facing away from Jared and slipped his shirt back on.  Jared didn't bother and just waited for the sun's rays to dry him off as he usually did on hot days.  They went back to lying next to each other in comfortable silence, just enjoying the moment and each other’s presence.  Jared noted how strange that was for him since he was never normally happy when he wasn't talking or doing something but, with Jensen, he felt a new calm come over himself and he was able to just savour the moment of being here with the other man.  He felt content.  Jensen's quiet voice drew him out of his reverie. 

'Thank you, Alpha. I don't know how to...I just...thank you.'  Jared knew Jensen meant for more than just that day, they both knew what Jensen's life had been like before and what would have happened if Jared had left Jensen with Morgan.

Jared grabbed Jensen's hand, feeling the now familiar tingle spread up his arm at the contact, and squeezed it, 'Nothing to thank me for.  And you can call me Jared when it's just the two of us or if we're at home.'  _Home_ , he probably shouldn't refer to the house like that in front of Jensen, it wasn't Jensen's home until he chose it to be, and the young man probably had no idea how much Jared wanted him to stay.  He smiled, though, when Jensen didn't correct him or let go of his hand.

'Alright, Jared.'  As much as Jared's wolf loved it when Jensen called him Alpha, Jared, the man, needed to establish that level of familiarity between himself and Jensen before he tried to move their relationship forward.   
  



	8. Chapter Eight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Eight: The Goo Goo Dolls- ‘Iris.’ This was chosen more for the end of the chapter when the shift occurs but it does apply pretty much the whole way through the story for describing the way Jared feels about Jensen.

** Chapter Eight. **

_ Jared. _

Jared wasn't sure of the best way to get Jensen out into the pack, he knew it wasn't going to be something that Jensen wanted to do; Jared was pretty sure the Beta would have been happy to spend the rest of his days closeted up in Jared's house.  But that wouldn't do.  Jensen had too much to offer the world to be locked away from it, he’d spent years out of it and now the world wanted him back, even if Jared, himself, could see some advantages of having the Beta all to himself.  

Jared thought the best way to go about this was to get Jensen to think that he was doing Jared a favour by getting out of the house.  So, the first day he suggested Jensen leave the house, he set him up with a job in the local shop stacking the shelves.  Everyone in the pack had a job and, whilst he was sure that this wasn't going to be the one that Jensen would end up with, he thought it would be a good way for Jensen to get used to being around other members of the pack without having Jared at his side.  

Jared would be close by, of course; he planned to stay in the manager's office with Mike the entire time that Jensen was there so that if Jensen became overwhelmed or distressed, at any point, he could come and find Jared and he'd take the younger wolf home. It was another bonus that Mike ran the shop so Jensen would have another familiar face in the unfamiliar surroundings.  Determined, Jared went into Jensen's room, knocking before he was admitted,

'Hey Jen, I've got a favour to ask.'

'Anything, Alpha.'  The ‘Alphas’ still sometimes slipped in without Jensen noticing, but the times were becoming fewer as Jensen became more settled in Jared's presence. 

'Someone's called in sick at Mike's shop and I really need someone to cover the shift, do you think you could do that for me?'  Jared felt the little white lie was  forgivable  since the whole exercise was to help Jensen in the end.  Jensen bit his lip, and looked down at his hands, folded tightly together in his lap.  Jared could almost hear the argument going on in the younger wolf's head; he didn't really like to push Jensen but he felt that it was necessary, in this case, so he let Jensen sort through this one himself. 

'What do I...will there by lots of people there?'  Jensen asked quietly, and Jared hated the quiver he heard in Jensen's voice. 

'Well it's the local shop, Jen, so there will be people trickling in throughout the day but it’s small so there won’t be too many at once.  I only need you to stay for a couple of hours at most and I'll be there the whole time; I need to talk to Mike about some of the shipments for this week.'  He placed what he hoped was a reassuring hand on Jensen jiggling knee to stop the movement.  It did. 

'You will?'  The hopeful, almost pleading, tone in Jensen's voice broke Jared's heart and he wanted to add that he would _always_ be there for the wolf if Jensen wanted him to be.  

'I will.'  Jared nodded, sensing victory.

'Ok, Alpha.'  Jensen's jaw set, determined.  'What do I have to do?'

*****

Two hours in and Jensen was doing a great job; his meticulous and efficient nature meant that he worked at a rate about three times that of the other shop assistants Mike usually had in store.  Jensen did get nervous every time someone spoke to him, though, his eyes dropping to the ground instantly, but he still helped them out, just as Jared had asked him to do.  It was pretty remarkable actually, in Jared's opinion, and Mike was clearly impressed to.  Despite his discomfort, Jensen seemed to be determined to do the best job he could for Jared and for the pack.  It made Jared proud to see it. 

*****

Five hours since Jensen had started and Jared felt that Jensen was flagging a little.  He was still not 100% yet,  health wise , and Jared didn't want the other wolf to overdo it on his first day.  Jensen had started to relax a little by the end of the shift and had even started talking to some of the other workers in the store.  True, none of them had been a part of Welling's Pack but it was still interaction initiated by Jensen so Jared was pretty damn happy about it.  

Jared walked out of the office over to Jensen's side and stopped him in the middle of unpacking a pallet of baked beans.  Jared looked at the shelf space that Jensen had been packing and it was immaculate.  Worryingly so.  Every can or tube was in exactly the same orientation, each label facing directly towards the front and the products placed precisely the same distance apart, unlike the rest of the aisles that were stacked and filled rather more haphazardly.  He'd have to tell Jensen at some point that perfection wasn't really necessary and it concerned him to think how that particular lesson could have been drilled into the other wolf but he wasn't going to ask, not now anyway.

'You good to go, Jen, Claire's just turned up so we can shoot off if you're ready?'  Jensen placed the last can on the shelf and turned to Jared and grinned, a look of pure satisfaction on his face.  Jared had had the feeling that Jensen would feel better about accepting his and the pack's kindness if he felt like he was doing something useful, and it looked like he was right.  

'Yep, I'm all done, I hope it's alright, it's probably not up to the usual standard but..'

'Believe me, Jen, your aisle is _totally_ the best aisle in the shop.'  Jared could say that with absolute confidence, sure that no shelf in Mike’s had ever looked better.  

Jensen blushed and gave Jared a small smile, clearly proud of his work.  'Mike told me that Joanna's going to be out sick for the rest week, she's got the flu apparently, how would you feel about filling in her shift for the next couple of days?'

Jensen, nervously, looked up at the shelf he'd been stacking and then down the aisle obviously not sure what to do.  

'I'll be here again tomorrow are since Mike's been having problems with one of our suppliers that's going to take me an age to sort out.'  Jared added, hoping that would lessen some of Jensen’s anxiety.

Jensen nervous movements stopped almost instantly once he realised Jared would be at the shop with him, 'Oh, okay then, yeah, I can do that.'  

Jared knew Jensen would have to get used to him not being around, but not just yet, maybe later in the week.  Jared knew progress when he saw it and this, _this_ was definitely progress.  

*****

After a week working at Mike's and two days where Jensen had been able to go to the store for his shift without Jared coming along to, Jared started to put some real thought into what Jensen might like to do permanently in the pack.   Mike had said that Jensen had always wanted to be a teacher, and since he had moved in with Jared he had made his way through a fair number of the books in Jared's house.  Jensen was certainly smart enough and more than willing to help anyone out so Jared thought working at the school, maybe as an English Teacher’s Assistant, would be a good next step for him. 

They sat down on the couch, a bowl of pasta each, as Jared flipped on another movie; they watched a new one pretty much every night, Jared was determined to get Jensen caught up with all the movies he should have spent his teen years watching.   Tonight's choice was ‘The Hangover’.; Jared tried to steer clear of any movies with knives or kidnap or heavy themes that might make Jensen uncomfortable.  That did limit their choices, somewhat, since the movie industry had become more and more lax with its portrayal of sex and violence over the last twenty years but Jared made do.  To be honest, some of the scarier ones had had Jensen curling into his side more readily and that was never a bad thing as far as Jared was concerned.  

'Hey Jen, Jo's back at work tomorrow.'  He watched the almost disappointed expression cross Jensen's face before the younger wolf wiped it away.  That was a good sign since Jensen had clearly enjoyed being out in the territory much more than he had expected to, which might make him more open to Jared’s next suggestion.  

'Yeah, I know, Mike said so today.'

'Well, I was thinking that since you seemed to enjoy being out of the house so much, you'd like to help out the English class at the local elementary.  You'll be working with Sandy and I know she can always use help with the little rascals.  What do you think?'  Jared held his breath; he hoped the substitution of Sandy for himself would be enough of a safety net for Jensen since Jensen knew that Sandy was one of Jared’s best friends and that she wasn’t a werewolf from Jensen’s old pack.

'I...yeah, that sounds great...but I don't...I didn't even finish high school Jared, I'm really not good...qualified to do that?'  Jensen shuffled his feet, things like this were always tricky subjects to broach with Jensen; all the things he'd missed out on while he had been Morgan's Beta were understandably a sore subject.

'That doesn't matter here, Jen.  First of all, you're just going to be an extra pair of hands for Sandy, right now, and if you find you really like it there then we can get you trained up.'  Jared reassured him.

Jensen nodded but the worried frown still creased his forehead and Jared could just tell he was second guessing his ability to really help Sandy tomorrow.

****

_ Jensen. _

Jensen had sat in the corner of the classroom, watching intently, as Sandy wrote out the spellings for the class to learn on the black board.  He didn’t really know what he was meant to be doing so he just tried to stay out of the way and be ready in case Sandy needed help with anything.  Jensen could just about remember his own school days and none of his teachers had been as nice as Sandy; the kids clearly loved her and he could see why.  She had a kind smile and a charming sense of humour; he could see why she was one of Jared’s best friends. 

The bell rang and all the kids literally tumbled outside into the playground behind the school. 

‘Hey, Jensen, why don’t you go outside and keep an eye on the kids, for a moment, whilst I just get everything for the classes after lunch ready in here?’  Jensen nodded and followed his charges outside. 

He watched the kids playing around, all of them staying in their human form, obviously having been told by their parents not to rip up their clothes.  He smiled as he watched them play together, thinking of his own school days all those years ago.  A cry caught his sharp ears and he turned his head towards the sound.  A little girl sat on the ground holding her knee, crying.  

Jensen quickly ran over to the little girl and knelt down next to her.  ‘Hey sweetie, what have you done?’  He smiled down at her, trying to see what she had done. 

‘I…I…fell over.’  She sniffed, holding her knee closer to her chest.

‘Okay, okay, it’s alright, can I see?’  She looked at him for a moment, red and puffy eyes studying his appearance before she nodded and took her hand away. 

Jensen saw a small graze across her knee, ‘Alright honey, I’m just gonna put a plaster on that for you,’ Jensen ran over to the outside first aid kit kept at the edge of the playground, werewolf pups tended to get themselves hurt an awful lot in their rough-housing.  ‘Well look at that, I’ve got a Barbie one just for you.’  He opened up the plaster and gently placed it over the graze.  ‘There all better.’  She smiled up at him, albeit a little shakily, and he reached out to wipe away the last of her tears.  

The little girl leaned up and gave him a kiss on the cheek before running away leaving a bemused Jensen holding his hand to his cheek.

****

_ Jared. _

Jared smiled to himself; he had been watching from the classroom as Jensen had run over to the little girl’s side.  He knew Jensen was good with kids but the care he had taken with the hurt child had filled his heart and told him exactly where Jensen belonged in his pack.  

‘Wow. you really do have it bad Jay, I thought Chad was just taking the piss out of you, but I can see he wasn’t exaggerating.’  He turned to look at Sandy, wanting to feel indignant about that but he couldn’t really find it in him. 

‘Yeah I have,’ he said simply; it was true, the younger wolf had affected him so much more than he had thought he would and he had barely known him a couple of weeks.  

Sandy’s teasing eyes turned soft and she placed a hand on his arm, ‘I’m really pleased for you, Jay, you deserve to be happy and, from what I’ve heard, I think that wolf out there could do with some happiness in his life too.’  Jared nodded, he was more than willing to be the one who brought that happiness into Jensen’s life. 

‘I think he’ll be good at the clinic, Sands.  Misha’s always begging me for someone who’s good with kids to take care of them when their parents are being treated or maybe just talk to them through their own tests.  The last two guys I put in there to help were an absolute disaster but I think Jensen could do it.’  Jared mused.  Jensen had an undeniable connection with kids and Jared knew that Chris and Misha would look after the Beta whilst Jared wasn’t there. 

‘Yeah, I think that’s a great idea, he’s a real natural with the kids, he was much more relaxed around them than he was with me.’  She smiled and it was both fond and sad.  ‘I think he thought I was judging him, you know’ Jared looked sharply at her and she shot him an offended look back, ‘I _wasn’t_ , you know me better than that, I just think that’s what he expects all of us to do because of his position in Morgan’s Pack.  I know you’ll help him through that, Jay, if there’s anyone who can help him it’s you.’  She said with confidence and Jared felt better at the difficult task of helping Jensen than he had when he had left the house that morning.  

Jared turned back to the window just in time to see Jensen tackled by three kids at once, laughing and falling backwards onto the grass.  Jared saw a flash of the future he could have with the Beta, in that instant, and he really hoped that he would get to live it.

*****

Over the next few weeks, Jensen flourished; he began talking to other wolves in the pack, even without Jared at his side eventually, and generally made himself useful.  He spent a lot of time with Alona and Mike which Jared was glad to see, he had been worried that with everything that had happened, it might have damaged that bond forever.  But Mike and Alona had been patient and Jared knew that they were good wolves who would give Jensen the time he needed.  

He and Jensen had become closer and Jared was pleased to see that while Jensen still deferred to him for most of the decisions about their house, he was starting to make his own in regards to _his_ life and had started giving his opinions more freely than before. 

The full moon was approaching and Jared was excited about the prospect of seeing Jensen's wolf.  Werewolves loved the moon and the freedom granted by the shift; they felt at one with nature and more powerful when she was full.  This was why he was surprised when he entered Jensen's room one morning to find the younger wolf pacing, clearly agitated. 

'Jen?  What's wrong?'  Jensen kept pacing and rubbing his neck.  Jared moved over to him and placed a hand on his arm to stop him pacing, but the flinch the touch elicited was so great that Jared quickly removed his hand again and took a step backwards.  'Jensen, what is it?'

'I don't know, I…I feel strange, my skin feels too tight and really sensitive, I don't know what's wrong, Jared.'  Jared would have smiled if he hadn't been so puzzled and Jensen hadn't been so upset.  It was exactly what everyone else would be feeling this close to the full moon; the wolf ready to burst out as soon as the white orb rose into the sky.  What Jared didn't understand was why Jensen didn't know that was what he was feeling.  

'Nothing's wrong, Jensen, it's just your wolf, he's getting ready to run.'  Jared explained, gently, hoping to  dispel Jensen's fears.  Instead Jensen's eyes widened and he bit his lips so hard that Jared smelt blood. 

'But...I…I can't...I haven't.'  Jared choked slightly as it all fell into place in his mind; the silver collar, the cuffs, if Jensen had had to wear them _all_ of the time, he wouldn't have been _able_ to change.  

That must have meant that Jensen hadn't shifted in at least four years.  It was unthinkable.  Jared had never come across it before, he had just assumed Morgan let Jensen out of the silver at least once a month for the moon; it was a surprise Jensen hadn't gone mad.  Jared walked over to Jensen and pulled him into a hug to stop his restless movements.  Jensen stiffened for a moment before melting into Jared's embrace.

'It's okay, Jensen, we'll shift together, I'll get you through this, you trust me right?'  Jensen nodded immediately and it warmed Jared to see that, even after all those years of abuse, Jensen was still willing to trust an Alpha.  

That still left Jared with a problem, though, since after all those years, he was sure the shift wasn't going to be easy for Jensen.  Jared would have to talk to Misha and ask his advice.  The werewolf knew pretty much everything about human and werewolf medicine and he'd never let him down yet.  Jared just hoped Misha wouldn't let him down when it came to helping the person who had quickly become the most important thing in his world.  

****

Jensen sat in their lounge curled up on the sofa, his fingers flexing in the pillows.  Jared couldn't imagine how scary all this must be for Jensen.  As a werewolf, Jensen should have been able to change at will and be able to put off the shift at the full moon if he had to.  He should have been able to control his lupine side in a way that he clearly couldn't anymore.  

If Jared had to make a guess as to the cause of it, his best would be that too many years restrained by silver chains, too many years spent suppressing his lupine half completely, meant the wolf wouldn't be tamed and kept inside on the full moon anymore.  Misha had said that there was very little medical advice he could give on the subject, apparently this kind of thing just didn't happen, werewolves didn't deny their wolf side so no-one really knew what would happen when a wolf did, voluntarily or not.  

Jared sat down next to Jensen and took the man’s smaller hand in his.  Jensen felt hot, really hot, hotter than werewolves usually got even before the shift.  That worried Jared and he saw the sweat beading on Jensen's brow.  

'You alright, Jensen?'

Jensen shook his head fervently, then looked at Jared and Jared was shocked to see that Jensen's green eyes were far brighter than he'd ever seen them, almost luminous.  The change was starting and the moon was barely even up yet.  

'It's alright, Jen, it’s just the shift starting, that's what you're feeling.'  The rubbed his hand up and down Jensen's trembling arm.

Suddenly, Jensen doubled over and fell from the couch onto his knees and Jared heard a series of loud cracking noises as Jensen's bones broke and realigned themselves.  Jensen's wolf was ripping its way out of the scared, and essentially unwilling, human Jensen's body. 

Jared fell to his knees next to Jensen, 'Jensen, you need to stop fighting it, it won't hurt if you don't fight it.'  Jensen was whimpering on all fours, his arms and legs shaking with pain and fear, and Jared could already see the wolf starting to take shape.  But Jensen wasn't relaxing, he was as taut as a bowstring, and if Jensen didn't loosen up soon, the wolf was going to tear him apart and the pain would be unbearable.  

Jared made a quick decision and grabbed Jensen round the waist and pulled him into his lap.  Jared closed his mouth round the back of Jensen's neck for a moment, bit down hard, and then pulled away, 'Relax, Beta.'  He commanded.  Jared felt the muscles in Jensen's body start to  unwind .  'Relax _now_ , Jensen.'  He ordered again.  Jensen finally relaxed back into Jared's chest and his breathing evened out a little more.  

Jared allowed Jensen to transform the rest of the way on his lap, whispering reassurances and mild orders into the younger wolf's ear to help him along the way.  He stroked down Jensen's back and across the nape of his neck whenever he felt Jensen start to tense up again.  

Soon, Jared had a large dark blonde wolf on his lap.  It was always a struggle to keep his own Alpha wolf under his skin this close to the full moon but with Jensen in his lap giving it all sorts of dirty ideas, it was damn near impossible.  He hastily removed Jensen from his lap before his own wolf could even _think_ about carrying out any of those plans.  The mental pictures he had from tonight would be starring in his dreams for the next few weeks, that was for damn sure. 

And, wow, Jensen was stunning.  Not a huge surprise really, but seeing him in all his lupine glory still brought Jared up short for a moment.  Jensen looked up shyly at him, ducking his head and knocking it against Jared's leg.  Jared realised he’d been staring but who could blame him?  The dark blonde wolf in front of him had all the grace of his human, and all the power of the wolf.  The green eyes that had captivated Jared since that first day, when he had seen Jensen at Morgan's side, stared back at him so intensely that Jared felt his heart stutter.

'Jensen, you're beautiful.'  He whispered more to himself than to the wolf in front of him.  Jared frowned as the wolf shook his large head and averted his eyes.  'Come on, man, let's go for a run.'  Jensen sprang up at that and wagged his tail, his tongue lolling out of his mouth in a wolfish grin.  Jared shifted himself and huffed out a laugh, leading the younger wolf out the back door and into the woods. 

They ran through the night and it seemed that Jensen's earlier pains from the transformation were all but forgotten in the light of the moon.  Jared was pretty sure it would be easier for Jensen next time, and after a few full moon cycles he'd set about helping Jensen control the shift rather than letting it control him.  But for tonight, he was just going to have some fun with the Beta.  

Jared chased Jensen through the trees; Jensen was fast, he'd give the younger wolf that, but Jared had been trained as a hunter since his fifth birthday and always managed to ambush the smaller wolf in the end through an unbeatable combination of stealth and tactics.  A few hours before sunrise Jared had Jensen pinned on his back once again, Jensen's throat bared in submission below him and all was right in Jared's world.  God, he could live the rest of his life with just this and be happy, just running through the wilds with this Beta by his side.  

The lick to his muzzle caught him by surprise and he looked down and saw the mischievous gleam flicker in the eyes of the wolf below him.  He nipped Jensen back in response.  Yes, he could be very happy living forever _just_ like this. 

****

The next morning, Jared awoke with Jensen spooned in front of him, now back in human form.  Jared assumed the wolf had been asleep when he had shifted back, which brought Jared some comfort since the pain of the change had clearly been brought on by Jensen rallying against it rather than any impairment of Jensen's body.  That would mean that once Jensen managed to control his nerves, the change should be as painless for him as it was for everyone else.  

Jensen stirred in his arms, and Jared was suddenly aware that they were both very naked and he was pressed up tightly against Jensen's _very_ naked back.  He didn't want Jensen to freak out about their closeness but he also didn't want to push Jensen away either and leave him feel rejected.  Werewolves craved contact; him pushing Jensen away could have been heart-breaking for the younger wolf.  Jared stayed very still, not knowing what to do for the best, as the wolf in his arms turned around to look at him, fixing him with those stunning green eyes, now a little less bright and luminous but still just as bewitching. 

'Um...morning, Alpha.'  Jensen said with a deep blush painting his features and a nervous smile which was really more of a grimace; he'd clearly taken in their naked states and had probably felt Jared's not so soft cock against his ass.  'Should we…uh...head back?'

'Yes, definitely, we should, definitely head back, absolutely.' Jared stammered out and stood up quickly in an effort to put some distance between himself and the other wolf as subtly as possible.  He didn't really think he achieved the subtle part but he got the distance so one out of two wasn't all that bad.  Jared really wanted to shift so Jensen wouldn't see his aroused state but he didn't want Jensen to feel awkward by being naked alone in the middle of the woods.  

Jensen stood keeping his back to Jared.  Jared wasn't all that opposed to the view, if he was honest, because, Jesus Christ, what a back; the sinuous curve of the man's spine was like poetry and it was all Jared could do not to run his hand down it in reverence.  Jensen looked over his shoulder, biting his bottom lip as he turned slowly to face Jared, and Jared was surprised to see that he wasn't the only one affected by waking up next to another naked man. 

'I...I'm sorry Alpha, I didn't mean to...'  Jensen looked up, pleadingly, at Jared.

'Jen, it's fine, happens to the best of us.'  Jared shrugged, letting Jensen see he was in a similar state.  He gave Jensen a smile to reassure him but was confused when Jensen looked even more agitated,

'I'm sorry, it's me… I’m doing that, I never really learned to control my pheromones, I'm sorry, Alpha, I'll…I’ll do better next time.'  Jensen said quietly, his hands balled tightly into fists.  

Jared was shocked to say the least and wondered who'd told Jensen that he needed to control his pheromones, ever.  It wasn’t a huge leap to assume that it had been Morgan, probably in an attempt to limit Jensen’s sexual interaction with any other wolf in case Jensen actually found his real mate.  Jared didn't really believe in suppressing their pheromones, it was all part of being a werewolf, a primal part of them that they couldn't and shouldn't deny.  If they were attracted to another wolf, their pheromones would let them and the other wolf know, and so helped lead wolves to their mates.  Plus, Jared was damn sure it wasn't Jensen's pheromones that had made him wake up hard that morning, it was Jensen's...well Jensen's everything else!

'No, Jensen, you don't have to control things like that, you're a werewolf, just let that side out.  Really it's not a problem, I bet my scent's all over these woods by now, it's natural for wolves to scent.  Jen, embrace it and, please, don't apologise for it.'  Jensen was bright red now and Jared decided to get him home and into some clothes before any of the other wolves came looking for him and Jensen was even more embarrassed than he had already been that morning.  

Jared wanted to kick himself, he really should have thought ahead and brought them out some clothes but nakedness was such a normal part of his life that he hadn't even considered that there would be any awkwardness caused by it in the morning.  It had been short sighted of him and he wouldn't make the same mistake again.

As they walked back, the thought suddenly struck him that _he'd_ made Jensen release his pheromones all over the woods last night.  He found himself smiling at the fact that Jensen's wolf obviously found his wolf appealing even if Jensen didn't quite know what that meant yet.  Jared was happy for the rest of the day.  
  



	9. Chapter Nine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Nine: Jon McLaughlin - ‘So Close.’ I thought this conveyed how Jared felt about his relationship with Jensen here; he’s so close to having him but so close to maybe losing him at the same time.

** Chapter Nine. **

_ Jensen. _

A few days later, Jensen was walking back from the clinic, where he'd been working with Misha and Chris, thinking about how much his life had changed in the past month.  He really liked working there.  As much as he had enjoyed working at Mike’s and then at the school with Sandy, this was the job that really called out to him.  Jensen got to help the pack and Misha had claimed that he displayed an astounding level of compassion and empathy that allowed him to connect to the patients despite his reserved manner.  

He preferred working with the kids; it was when he felt he could really let his guard down.  Jensen used to look after the pups back in Tom's pack when their parents were off on pack business.  At the clinic, he would distract them while Misha worked with their parents or did tests that they might have found painful had Jensen not been there to drag their young minds away.  

Jensen just couldn’t believe that he finally had a job that he loved and people he really cared about when a month ago he’d already resigned himself to a life of pain and humiliation with Jeff.  It was like being given a second chance.  And it was all thanks to Jared and Jensen just didn’t know how to deal with that.

****

_ Chris. _

Chris and Misha were the only qualified doctors in the pack so they had more than enough work between them and Jensen's enthusiasm to help was a God’s send and pretty endearing to say the least.  Chris had felt protective of the wolf from the moment he, Jared and Chad had seen him at Morgan's feet but, over the last few days of them working closely together, Chris had seen so many aspects of Jensen's personality that he couldn't help but feel more for the wolf than he knew he should.  

Chris had seen Jensen's stunning face back at his old pack but he had no idea that the soul beneath would match and it shook him in more ways than he liked to admit.  Chris was more of a lone wolf, always had been; yes, he was loyal to Jared’s Pack and would give his life for any of them but he had never relied on anyone but himself and he had never even considered the possibility of finding a mate one day.  He'd never had the urge to mate and just figured that he was wired that way.  But as he watched Jensen tumble around on the floor with one of the younger pups he started to consider that maybe he’d been wrong all these years.  

'Chris?'  Chris shook his head to clear it and looked up at Genevieve, the clinic's secretary, who wore an amused expression on her face. 

'Sorry, what do you say, Genevieve, I was a million miles away?'  The smile on her face grew as she looked between Chris and the young werewolf playing on the carpet. 

'Not that far away I don’t think.  Anyway, I said your next patient is waiting for you in room two.'  Chris nodded, 'Oh and Chris you might want to wipe that drool off the side of your mouth before I send Jensen in to help you.'  She laughed when he raised his hand to his mouth then scowled, realising his mistake. 

****

_ Jared. _

Three days after the change and Jensen seemed happier in himself, looser and more relaxed than Jared had ever seen him; it was the wolf, Jared was sure, all that pent up energy had finally been let out.  Jensen came back in the evening and sat next to Jared on the couch with a puzzled expression on his face.  He clearly wanted to start a conversation but was not sure where to begin; he just kept opening his mouth and closing it again, fidgeting where he sat.  

Jared just waited patiently, it was the best to let Jensen start conversations if he had something to tell Jared or Jensen would just follow his lead and they'd never get to what Jensen had really wanted to say.  

Finally, Jensen spoke sounding completely confused, 'Chris asked me out to dinner today.'  

Jared tamped down the sudden surge of jealousy that threatened to pour over into a growl and asked, as neutrally as he could manage, 'What did you say?'

'Nothing, I…I kind of ran away.'  Jensen blushed and looked anywhere but at Jared.  It was absolutely adorable and Jared found it hard to suppress a smile.

'Why did you do that?'  Jared asked, he was pretty damn interested to know the answer to that question.

'Because I didn't understand why he asked me.'  Jared understood Chris’ motives all too well even if Jensen did not.  He had seen the way some of the other Alphas had looked at Jensen and he knew Jensen didn't notice, just returning their smiles, oblivious to the effect he was having on them.  Chris seemed to have fallen under the younger wolf's spell, as well.  But as much as Jared hated the very idea of another wolf anywhere near his Jensen (God, not _his_ ), he wouldn't dream of standing in Jensen's way should he choose a different Alpha. 

'He asked you because he wants to spend time with you, talk to you, get to know you better, I assume.'  Jared wasn't sure he'd pulled off the nonchalant tone he was going for but Jensen seemed too lost in his own thoughts to notice anyway. 

'But I see him every day at work, what else would he want to talk to me about that he can't talk to me about then?'  Jared bit the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning.

'Um, I think he wants to get to know you, one on one, in a more _romantic_ setting Jen.'  Jensen's green eyes widened at that. 

'Do you mean...?'  The flailing hand gesture was enough to make Jared understand what Jensen meant.

'I think so.'  Jared answered, not sure what Jensen's reaction would be, he was four years out of  practise with dealing with people and, as far as Jared knew, had no experience of dating at all.

'Oh.'  Jensen looked sad for a moment, rubbing the back of his neck as he said softly, 'Do I have to?  I mean, I know he's an Alpha, but I don't really want to but I will if that’s the way it is.'

'God, no, Jen, of course you don't _have_ to go.  In my pack Alphas don't just order Betas around like that, it's a partnership and the only time an Alpha would ever use their authority over their mate was if their mate was in danger and that's only in a paired mating.  Neither Chris nor any other Alpha holds any claim on you, Jensen, you don't have to do anything another Alpha tells you to do if you don't want to.'

'Except you.'  That sent a thrill down Jared's spine and he was pretty sure he heard something else in Jensen's soft voice.  Maybe that was just wishful thinking. 

'That's true, Jen, but I would only openly order you to do something to protect you or the pack and even then you don't actually have to stay in this pack if you don't want to.  I'm sure the other packs would happily take you in.'  Jared explained, still a little disturbed that Jensen had thought he had to go on a date with Chris just because Chris was an Alpha and he was a Beta.

'You want me to leave?'  Jensen sounded so alarmed and hurt that Jared acted on instinct and pulled him close into his broad chest. 

'No, of course not, I'm just letting you know you have the option to leave if ever you should want to.'  Jared reassured the younger wolf, letting a hand run through Jensen’s hair to help calm him. 

'I won't.'  Jensen whispered back, soft but sure, and the knot of tension that had been lodged in Jared’s stomach, ever since he had brought Jensen home to his pack,  dissipated .

'Good, we're all happy you're here, Jensen.'  Myself most of all, he thought, although he didn't think it would be right to add that sentiment just yet.  

****

Jared had resolved to talk to Chris the next day about Jensen.  He wanted to tell the other wolf that Jensen clearly wasn't ready for that kind of relationship yet.  He told himself, firmly, that it really was because Jensen wasn't ready and not because he wanted to keep Jensen to himself for just a little while longer.

'Hey Chris, can I talk to you for a minute?'  Jared said, knocking on the slightly open door of Chris’ office at the clinic.

'Sure, Jay, what can I do for you?'  

'It's about Jensen.'  Chris stopped writing but didn't look up, a clear avoidance tactic.  

'Oh, what about him?'  Chris answered even they both knew exactly what Jared was talking about.

'He told me you asked him out.'  Jared stated baldly to the other wolf.  There was no point beating around the bush on this one, Jensen was too important for Jared not to finish what he came to do.

'Oh he did, did he?'  Chris answered absently, having resumed his writing.

'Yes and I just wanted to tell you that I think you need to back off a little, Jensen just isn't ready for that yet.'  Jared explained, adding a little of his Pack Alpha authority to the words. 

Chris lifted his eyes to Jared's at that and they were narrowed and cold, 'Is it that _he's_ not ready, Jared, or that _you're_ not ready to let him go?'

'I have nothing to do with this, Chris, I just know that he's not ready.'  Jared argued back, keeping his voice steady and even.

_ 'Right _ , and you wanting him as your Beta has absolutely _nothing_ to do with you being here?'  Chris snorted at Jared as though the idea were ludicrous. 

'It doesn't, Chris, you know me better than that; I would never try to control Jensen like that, especially after everything he's been through.'  Jared could feel himself getting angry and tried to dampen his emotions, it would do no good to yell at Chris about this. 

'Do I Jay?  We've all seen the way you look at Jensen so if you're warning me off so you can keep him for yourself, know this- I won't back down that easily, Pack Alpha or not.'  Chris stood up and shoved Jared hard on his way out of his office leaving Jared alone, gaping after his friend.  

Chris always had had trouble controlling his temper; the Alpha was volatile to say the least.  That combined with the pull of a Beta would make things unpleasant between them if they both pursued Jensen.  Jared sighed and walked back to his house.  

There was nothing he could do but wait for Jensen to make his choice.  If he said no to Chris, Jared had no doubt the other wolf would back off; Chris truly cared about Jensen and wouldn't want to do anything to hurt him.  It didn't stop Jared worrying about the young Beta though.   
  
  



	10. Chapter Ten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Ten: No soundtrack for this one since there is just no angst in this chapter- I know shock horror! And all the music I listen to is sad and angsty so I just couldn’t find anything that fit.

** Chapter Ten. **

_ Jared. _

As Jared had expected, Chris and Jensen's relationship continued on the same as it had before.  Jared assumed Jensen thought he had misunderstood the other wolf's intentions and had fallen back into their old routine and Jared thought Chris might actually have, grudgingly, taken his advice and backed off.  

That was one worry off his mind at least.  Jared still needed to talk to the other werewolves from Morgan's Pack and make sure they understood how things worked in his pack if they wanted to stay.  He had left it far longer than he normally would have to introduce the new wolves to the ways of the Padalecki Pack but he’d been so tied up with Jensen that he really hadn’t had time to deal with it yet.  Luckily, many of the wolves were originally part of Welling's Pack since a lot of Morgan's wolves had gone down when Jared had challenged their Head Alpha.  

Jared called a meeting, with Chad and Chris at his side, for the other wolves to attend.  Chris nodded at Jared as he entered, letting the Alpha know that he still had his back despite their disagreement about Jensen.  Jared had already known that but it made him feel better having the tangible proof of Chris’ support.  

'Good Morning everyone.  I've called this meeting to see how you're all settling in and to make sure everyone is happy with the way I run my pack.'  Most of the wolves nodded their heads; Jared made a quick mental note of the ones who didn't and noticed they were all former members of Morgan's inner guard.  

'I know things are different here than they were in Morgan's Pack and it must be difficult for you all to make the change.  I have been assured by Mike and Alona that those of you from the Welling Pack shouldn’t find it difficult to adjust here; we have similar values and practices to those that Tom employed so I'm sure you're all settling in fine.  Those of you from Morgan's original pack will probably have more trouble settling in so I just wanted to reiterate the points that were told to you when you first joined my pack.

'Everyone pulls their weight here, we can find you a job most suited to your skill set but everyone has a job and does that job to the best of their ability, no matter their status, everyone is equal in this pack and does their share.’

'Even you, _Alpha.'_   The mocking tone had Chad moving towards the wolf who had spoken.  Jared stopped him.  The man had been Morgan's Second in Command and would always be the most difficult of the newcomers but Jared didn't want a fight here so he ignored the sneer in the man's tone to continue.

'Yes, even me.  I look down on no wolf in my pack, you are all my family and the only time I’ll ever command a wolf to follow my orders is for the good of my pack and I will protect them, Jake, from everything I think that’ll try to do them harm.'  The threat was subtle but unmistakable and Jared caught the beginnings of a snarl before Jake managed to pull it back.  'And I have a job, too, I train wolves in self  defence at the gym every day to make sure any wolves who wish to be trained have the opportunity to do so.

'Secondly, beatings and cruelty will not be tolerated here; if punishment is to be dealt out, the wolf in question is brought to me with the evidence of their crime and I’ll decide what needs to be done.  No wolf has the right to harm another wolf of this pack, unless it is in self  defence .'

Jared took a deep breath before he mentioned the last important condition, one that he'd never had to tell any new werewolves joining his pack before,  'There will be no forced matings in my pack, no claiming without consent is acceptable; that will _never_ happen in my pack as it should never have happened in yours.'  

Jared clenched his jaw as he ignored the snort that came from Abel and continued, looking around his new pack members as he spoke, 'None of you are bound to this pack and you may leave now, with no ill will, if you don't feel that you can follow any of these conditions.  But if you decide to stay, they will be followed or you’ll suffer the consequences for disobeying them.  Remember this, I'll love you and protect you whilst you are a member of my pack, once you break any of these rules, you will no longer be my family and will be treated accordingly.  Understand?'

'Yes, Alpha' echoed around the room.  Jared nodded and left with Chad and Chris on his heels, knowing the new wolves would be shown the rest of their way of life by his original pack as they got more settled in.  

'Well, I think that went well, Jay,' Chad said as they sat down on one of the wooden benches outside Jared’s house.

'Yeah, I think so too.'  Jared agreed with his Second in Command.

'I think that Abel asshole might be a problem though.  Some of Morgan's inner circle, too.'  Chris added.  Jared nodded, the other wolf was right, it was likely that Abel would challenge his authority whenever he could.  'Plus, I really don't like the look he gave you when you talked about the forced mating, makes me worry he's a little more like Morgan than we'd realised.'  They didn't mention Jensen but it was obvious where their worry stemmed from.

'I know but I offered them all sanctuary here.  Just keep an eye on him, guys, and make sure he doesn't do anything he shouldn't be doing.'  They nodded and walked off to start their tasks for the day while Jared walked into his house.  
  



	11. Chapter Eleven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Eleven: Savage Garden- ‘I Knew I Loved You.’ I think this song's perfect for the way Jared thinks about Jensen and I think it fits in to the whole werewolf mates concept as well.

** Chapter Eleven. **

_ Jensen. _

Jensen was working late at the clinic, cleaning up at Genevieve's suggestion, despite Misha's and Chris' insistence that he go home.  Jensen didn't mind, he liked to keep busy; with Jeff, Jensen had always been cleaning, or cooking or...doing something all day, he'd never had leisure time.  He wasn't really sure what to do with all the free time that he seemed to have now.  

Jared wouldn't let him clean the house, just his room, and they cleaned everything else together.  It was strange to Jensen and he couldn't understand why, as an Alpha, Jared didn't just get him to take care of all the nasty jobs like that.  He wouldn't even mind doing that for Jared, after everything Jared had done for him.  The man was amazing and the fact that he had even allowed someone like Jensen to stay in his home was testament to how good the man was.   

Jensen shook his head and went back to scrubbing the floor in one of the clinic exam rooms when he heard a high pitched giggle from the hallway.  Not  realising that Genevieve was still there and not wanting to be rude, he opened the exam room door to maybe talk to her while he worked.  Jensen figured it would be rude to hide away in the room, since she must have known that he was still there, and she seemed nice enough even though her gaze sometimes took on a slightly colder edge when she looked at him.  Jensen couldn't blame her, they all knew what he had been in Morgan's Pack and if he were them he wouldn't want to be near him either.  Hell, he didn't want to be near himself most of the time.  

As soon as Jensen had started to open the door, he had heard a booming laugh that he immediately knew was Jared's and he stopped opening the door.  God, what was Jared doing here?  He peered out and saw Genevieve's perfectly manicured hand drift up and down Jared's arm in a soft caress.  Jensen jumped back, not wanting to eavesdrop on the two lovers, feeling his stomach flop at the very thought.  He figured he just felt uncomfortable for having seen what he had when the couple clearly thought they were alone but he still found it hard to breathe in the room nonetheless. 

It was two hours later when Jensen finally left to make his way back to Jared’s; he had waited an hour and a half after the two wolves had left and had made sure the clinic was cleaner than it had probably been since it was built.  Menial tasks always assuaged his guilt when he felt like he'd done something wrong but the knot in his stomach still hadn't left.  He felt awful for having witnessed such a private moment and shuddered to think what a pervert Jared would think he was if he thought Jensen had been spying.  Which he really hadn't been, he hadn't even known that Genevieve was the wolf Jared was interested in.

****

As soon as Jensen entered the lounge he rushed past Jared to the kitchen to start dinner.  He found that Jared had already started cooking, a cottage pie big enough for both of them in the oven, which left Jensen even more off balance and at a complete loss for something to do. 

'Jen, can you come in here for a second, please?'  Jensen tensed, what if Jared was about to throw him out of the pack or worse.  Jensen slowly walked into the lounge and knelt down besides Jared's feet, head bowed, ready to take whatever punishment Jared felt was appropriate.  Jensen immediately felt himself lifted up onto the couch next to Jared and his head rose to look Jared in the eye despite his attempts to not meet the larger man's gaze.  'Why didn't you come out and say hello at the clinic, I could smell you were still there?'

Jensen bit his lip and shook his head, not knowing what to say. 

'Jensen?'  Jared pushed.  Jensen’s shoulders slumped and he went with the truth and prayed that Jared wouldn't think too badly of him, it had just been a mistake after all.  And Jared wasn't like Jeff, he had said that mistakes were okay, right?  But did that include something like this?

'I...I...I'm really sorry, at first I didn't even know you were there.  I was cleaning and I thought I was alone but then I heard Genevieve laugh and I thought it would be really rude not to say something since she probably knew I was there as well.  But I didn't know the two of you were meeting there and I didn't want to interrupt, I'm really sorry, so I thought I'd just stay out of the way while you had your...your date and I'm so sorry…'

'Jensen, Jen, calm down, buddy, you're gonna pass out.'  Jared said laughing and placing a hand on Jensen's shoulder. 

'You're not mad?'  Jensen tried to slow his  panicked breathing so he didn't hyperventilate.

'No, I'm not mad, Jensen.'  Jensen relaxed a little at that, he should have known that Jared wouldn't be mad; Jared never seemed to get mad at Jensen no matter how stupid Jensen was, even though he acted like an idiot 95% of the time and spent the other 5% sleeping.  'And I wasn't there to meet Genevieve.'  That confused Jensen more than anything, the touch he'd seen and Genevieve's laugh had clearly been flirtatious, and, yes, Jensen was seriously out of the game (not that he'd ever really been in it) but he knew enough to know what those signals meant. 

'I was there to pick you up and walk you home.'  Jared said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world but Jensen couldn't understand why he hadn't been at the clinic to see his future Beta.

'But, I don't understand, why weren't you there to see Genevieve?'  Jensen asked before he could stop himself, Jeff always did say he never knew when to shut up. 

'I just wasn't.'  Jared shrugged.

'But _why_?  I thought that Alphas could hardly stay away from their chosen Betas?'  Jensen asked, that's what he'd been told, he'd never experienced the pull himself, his body had only ever wanted to be as far away from Jeff’s as possible.

'Genevieve's not my future Beta, Jensen.'  

'But...but she's so beautiful and rich and the way she laughed at your jokes, she's perfect for someone like you, Jared.'  Jensen had been positive that Genevieve was the Beta that Jared had been talking about at the lake but he was also almost sure Jared wouldn't lie to him.  Why would he bother?  Jensen's opinion of him didn't actually matter.

'She is a great person, Jensen, and we did date for a while but I never felt that connection with her.  I think she still thinks we could be mates one day but that ship has long since sailed as far as I'm concerned.'  Jared answered calmly, just like he always did when he was explaining something that Jensen didn’t understand or didn’t know.  Which was a lot.

Jensen nodded, he knew there was another Beta that Jared was already interested in if it wasn't Genevieve, Jared had told him as much. 

'Wow, that other Beta must really be something if you think she's better for you than Genevieve.'  Jensen must have met her and not know it yet.  He had met a load of awesome Betas in the pack so it wasn't surprising but none of them had flirted so openly with Jared as Genevieve had.  

Jensen felt the knot of worry in his gut disappear for the first time since Genevieve had touched Jared's arm.  His worry for his friend clearly dispelled knowing that he hadn't interrupted anything, he was sure that was what it was. 

'They really are, Jensen, you have no idea.'  Jared fixed him with a fond smile and the look in his eye was something Jensen had seen before when Jared had looked at him but he really didn't know what it meant.  Jared pulled him backwards onto the couch next to him and Jensen fell asleep like that half an hour later, missing dinner and sure he was just imagining Jared's long fingers carding through his hair.  

****

_ Jared. _

The weeks passed and Jared and Jensen became closer, most nights sitting together to watch a movie or the TV which usually ended with Jensen curled into Jared's side or leg and Jared carrying the younger wolf to bed.  The bond was obvious and even though Jared didn't want to push the issue he felt that he could take a chance now and see what Jensen thought about it. 

'Hey Jen?'  Jensen was sat on the floor between his legs as they watched 'Die Hard.' 

'Yes?'  Jensen looked up at him under those long, dark lashes and Jared nearly lost it right there and then.  He placed a hand on the smaller man's shoulder to stop himself dragging Jensen up and kissing him breathless. 

'I wanted to ask you something, just to see what you thought about it, but I really need you to be honest with me, okay.'  Jensen frowned at the serious note in his voice but nodded nonetheless.  'I wanted to see if you wanted to go out with me sometime?'

'We go out all the time, Jay.'  The confused look on Jensen's face deepened and it was so damn adorable.  It was true they _did_ go out all the time so it was no wonder Jensen was confused by his question. 

'I mean, out on a date, I want to take you to a movie, dinner maybe?'  He asked, apprehensive of the reaction he'd receive, it was a strange feeling, the only person who could ever make him feel unsure was Jensen.  The young man was so important to him that he didn't really know what he'd do if he was rejected.

The younger wolf tilted his head and placed a hand gently on Jared's thigh.  The innocent touch was doing things to Jared that he really needed to ignore right now.  'Why?'

'Why?'  Jared  parroted back in surprise, that was pretty much the last answer he expected to his question.

'Yes, why?  You told me about the wolf you wanted, why would you want to go out with me when you want them to be your Beta?  Do you want me to help you make them jealous?  Because I could totally do that.'  Jensen nodded at him, completely sincere. 

'No, that's not it at all, Jensen.'  He brushed his hand through Jensen's soft hair, it was now or never he supposed.  'Jen, the wolf I was talking about was you.'  

Jared didn't expect Jensen to pull away from him and stand up, nor did he expect the look of hurt and bewilderment on the man's face. 

'That's not funny, Alpha.'   Jensen said in a quiet voice.

'I know, it wasn't meant to be.'  Jared replied, utterly at a loss to explain the direction this conversation had taken.

'Stop it!  That's cruel and you promised that you wouldn't hurt me, I don't...I don't understand why you're making fun of me like this.'  Jared could hear the tears creeping into Jensen's voice and, God, if he made Jensen cry he'd never forgive himself.

Jared reached forward and grabbed the reluctant wolf's hand and pulled him to his side.  Jensen tried to squirm away but, for once, Jared held him fast, he needed Jensen to really understand him here.  'I'm not making fun of you, Jensen, I would never do that, I want you to come on a date with me because I like you a lot and I want to see if there is anything between us.'  Jensen stared at him with his intense jade eyes and shook his head slightly like he couldn't understand. 

'But why?'  He asked in a voice even quieter than before.

'Because you're amazing.'  The self-deprecating snort was enough to spur Jared on to say all the things he'd stopped himself saying since he had met the werewolf.  'And kind and generous and fun and gorgeous but, mostly, because you're my friend and I love spending time with you.'  He kissed Jensen on the top of the head and felt the younger wolf melt into his side.   
  



	12. Chapter Twelve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Twelve: Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman (originally by Elton John but I personally like the Moulin Rouge version better!)- ‘Come What May.’ This is probably one of the romantic songs of all time and it’s all about everlasting love and overcoming all obstacles to be together so perfect for Jared and Jensen in this. I also think it fits in with the story’s idea of everyone having that one person out there to complete them.

** Chapter Twelve. **

  
_ Jared. _

Jared was jazzed; he was taking Jensen on a date out of the territory later, away from the rest of the pack so they could truly get some time alone without worrying about prying eyes and gossiping mouths.  He wondered if Jensen had ever been to one of the human cities, it stood to reason that he might not have.  There were designated wolves in Jared's Pack that did the supply runs once a month and the territory provided pretty much everything else that the wolves needed.  They had a grocery store, a leisure  centre , schools, two cinemas; all the stuff that could be found in any small town in America.  

Some wolves, though, liked interacting with humans, some of them had even come from human towns and cities themselves before deciding to join Jared's Pack.  Jared didn't think Jensen was like that though; he knew enough about Jensen's past to know that he was born a werewolf and that his parents had lived outside of a pack before they'd died and Jensen had been taken in by the Welling Pack.  That kind of anti-pack wolf  behaviour didn't lend itself to wolves that liked human contact; they obviously lived off the land in the wild and probably stayed away from settlements, human or otherwise. 

Jared just hoped the new environment wouldn't be too much for Jensen to handle; he'd been doing remarkably well over the last few weeks and Jared couldn't wait to see Jensen through his next full moon.  The younger man had really come alive and he hoped to take him out for a run with the rest of the pack soon.  He was sure that Jensen would love to run with Chris and Misha.  

Jared was actually whistling as he walked through his front door (God, he was _so_ gone for the guy) and walked up the stairs to see how Jensen's day had been.  He knocked on the door but upon receiving no answer he opened it carefully. 

'Jen, you okay?'

He found Jensen pacing back and forth across the small guest room, wringing his hands.  All the clothes he had bought Jensen were strewn over the bed and Jensen didn't seem to have even noticed that Jared had come into the room. 

'Jen?'  Jensen jumped at the sound and looked at him, stricken.  'Jensen, what's the matter?'  

'I...I…you need to pick me something to wear, I don't...just give me something, just tell me what to wear, Alpha.'  Jensen stumbled over the words and they came out in a disordered rush. 

'Jensen, I'm not going to tell you what to wear.  I haven't since you got here, what's so different about today?'  Jared shook his head, Jensen hadn’t been this agitated in weeks.

'Because of,' Jensen blushed and looked away, 'Because of tonight, it's supposed special and I wanted it to be perfect for you.'  Jared felt warmth spread through him at the idea of the Beta wanting to make things perfect for him.  That warmth was successfully doused by the next words though, 'I _always_ get things wrong and I didn't want to screw up for you but I guess I have already, you seeing me acting like a crazy person.'

Jared grabbed both of Jensen's twitching hands in his, 'Jensen, you are _not_ crazy and you don't always screw up and, yeah, you've had a little freak out but I'm here to help you with those.  I _want_ to help you with those.'  Jensen nodded shakily. 'Ok, let's figure out what you want to wear then.  What's your favourite colour, Jen?'

'Green.'

'Right, green shirt it is then.'  Jared grabbed a deep green shirt off the bed and handed it to Jensen.

'But...what do you like...?'  Jensen tried to say before Jared stopped him.

'Not important, Jensen.  And pants, you wear jeans most days so do you wanna go with those?'  Jared knew that Jensen preferred the jeans to the dress pants that Jared had bought for him. 

'Are you sure that this is okay?'  Jensen asked as he  hesitantly reached for a pair of black jeans.

'Jensen, I just want you to be comfortable and I want you to wear something you like wearing, not something _I_ like you wearing.'  Jensen nodded again, 'Right, you get dressed, we'll be off in twenty minutes.'  He rubbed Jensen's arm reassuringly. 

He went to leave the room but turned back to look over his shoulder at Jensen, 'And for the record, you look pretty damn amazing in anything, Jensen, so really, you could wear a paper bag and you would still be as hot as hell.'  He winked and left the room, knowing he was leaving a blushing Jensen behind.  

****

Despite the rocky start at home, the date had gone really well.  Jared had interlaced their fingers in the movie theatre and Jensen had tucked himself into Jared's side for the rest of the picture, much like he did at home.  It started to rain as they walked back to the car and they both broke into a run for cover.  When he reached the car, Jared stopped and looked at Jensen laughing, he looked so beautiful, the rivulets of water running off him making his eyes shine and his lashes darken to frame them.  

Before Jared even knew what he was doing he strode over to Jensen, purposeful and confident, every bit the Alpha he was.  Jensen looked up at him and stopped laughing when Jared stopped in front of him and Jared just leaned down and kissed him.  It was so perfect and he heard Jensen moan into the kiss.  Jared deepened the kiss and was rewarded with Jensen wrapping his arms around his neck, clutching him like he never wanted to let go and really Jared was just fine with that.   
  



	13. Chapter Thirteen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Thirteen: Rascal Flatts – ‘What Hurts The Most.’ Jensen feels like he’s lost Jared to another Beta, in this chapter, before they’ve even gotten started and just when he realised that he was falling in love with Jared himself.

** Chapter Thirteen. **

_ Jensen. _

Three nights after their date, Jensen changed with the full moon.  Misha had talked to them and given Jensen some muscle relaxants to help him relax into the shift and not resist it.  It was easier this time and hardly hurt at all.  Jared was with him the whole time, and this time when Jared chased him, Jensen might have let himself get pinned a little faster and for a little longer than he had before.  He didn't know where his relationship with Jared was going but until Jared tired of him, which he undoubtedly would, he was going to make the most of every moment he got to have with the Alpha.

****

Jensen had met more knowing grins and heard more innuendos, that he didn't even really get, than he was really comfortable with that day at the clinic.  He was sure he had spent the whole day with a permanent blush on his face.  Chris and Misha had been great, each giving him a congratulatory pat on the back, although Chris' was accompanied by a sad look in his eyes.  

Genevieve, however, had been abnormally cold to him and even though he tried to make conversation with her, she was a member of his new pack after all and Jared's friend, she shot him down at every attempt.  She ran him ragged throughout the morning with false errands; each time he'd come back only to find that the medicine or the file he'd gone across the territory to get was actually in one of the examination rooms.  By six o'clock, he was exhausted and Chris was shooting daggers at Genevieve every time he left his office.  Misha was little better but was just about managing to hide his hostility towards the woman when the patients were around.

Jensen sat in a comfy chair in exam room three, primarily to get away from Genevieve's cutting remarks about his incompetence he'd had to endure all morning.  She was right though; he didn’t have any qualifications, no high school diploma, and you couldn't simply heal people with good intentions.  Genevieve was even more right in what she said about Jared though; Jared needed someone smart and capable, not some damn charity case.  

_ Jensen came back into the reception area, empty handed yet again.  He was glad no-one was waiting to be seen since he was a sweaty, untidy mess now.  He didn't like to be away from the clinic for very long so he had run over to Beaver's to get the extra bandages Genevieve had claimed they needed.  _

_ 'Oh sorry, Jensen, I found last week's shipment in the back.'  She smiled at him, but it was more teeth than anything else, and he just nodded weakly.  'Jared helped me unload them last Thursday, he's so strong and always so eager to help me whenever I ask.' _

_ 'Yes he is, he's the best.'  Jensen beamed at Genevieve, he wholly agreed with that, Jared was the best Alpha ever.  _

_ 'It's a shame that he's not ready to settle down with his Beta yet.  He told me he needed to play the field a little more before settling down with her.  He has all these responsibilities right now and apparently he just needs a little stress relief before plunging into his bonded relationship.  You know what it's like, eh, Jen, men sowing their wild oats before the right one comes along.'  Jensen felt his stomach twist.  'Anyway enough about my love life, be a good boy and go down and clean room two would you, Johnny Fisher vomited in there not 10 minutes ago.'  Jensen just nodded again and went to get the mop and bucket trying to ignore the sudden pain in his chest. _

****

_ Chris. _

The door opened and Chris popped his head in, a kind smile on his face. 

'Hey Jen, you need to go home, buddy, I'm going to lock up, do you wanna walk with me?'   Jensen nodded, clearly lost in his own thoughts, and got up from the comfy chair.

Chris knew there was something wrong.  Jensen had been on Cloud Nine, or more like Cloud Nine Hundred and Ninety Nine, this morning and now he looked more like that frightened wolf they'd rescued all those months ago.  As much as it pained him to admit it, Jared made Jensen happy and even if he couldn't have Jensen as his, he was glad that Jensen had found someone to love him the way he deserved to be loved.

On their way back, Chris tried to find out what was bothering Jensen but he was met with falsely cheery 'fines' and bright fake smiles which hurt Chris to see.  Jensen should never have to hide, not anymore and certainly not from him.  They got back to Jared's and saw Genevieve give Jared a lingering kiss on the man’s cheeks before leaving with a flirty wave.  

Chris felt Jensen tense beside him and he glared at the two werewolves.  He didn't think Jared would cheat on Jensen but he was certain that Genevieve would do anything to lead the Pack Alpha astray; the woman was poison and he and Misha had watched her treat Jensen was growing disdain as he and Jared had become closer.  

Jared smelt the air for a moment and looked over at the two of them coming over to his house.  He bounded over and wrapped his arms around Jensen, nuzzling at the shorter man's neck.  Jensen gave him a watery smile and softly butted his nose against the taller man's cheek in affection.  Chris saw the tears Jensen was struggling to hold back so he was damn sure that Jared saw them too.  

****

_ Jared. _

'I'm just going to go inside and have a shower and go to bed, it's been a long day.'  Jensen hesitated shaking his head, 'Um, if that's alright with you, Alpha, I mean I can make dinner, first...sorry, that was stupid to say that, what did you want me to make?  I can make anything?  I can run out to the shop if you need me to?'  Jared had no idea what was going on, Jensen only got like this when he was really upset.  His anger rose to the surface at the thought of someone hurting Jensen, it was even sharper than before now that Jensen had returned his affections.  He needed to talk to Chris and find out what the hell had happened and who needed to pay for it. 

'No, Jensen, it's fine, you go up to bed, I'm just gonna have some sandwiches, big lunch, ya know.'  Jared grinned his biggest smile at the Beta earning him a shy one in return. 

'Are you sure?  I don't mind, I'm not actually that tired, I was being stupid, that’s all, after everything you've done for me I can stop being so lazy.'  Jensen replied looking at his shoes.  Jared stalked over to Jensen and kissed him chastely on the mouth. 

'No, baby, you go up to bed and get some sleep, you look tired and I'm taking you out tomorrow so I don't want you to sleep through that.'  He kissed Jensen tenderly on the nose and nudged him gently towards the house.  

Once Jensen was inside, Jared turned to Chris, 

'What the hell happened?'

'What the hell was that?'

They both spoke at the same time, scowling at each other, and would have laughed had the subject matter not been so serious. 

'I don't know, Chris, he only gets like that when he's really upset.  Did something happen at the clinic?’  Then a unpleasant idea entered his mind, ‘I thought he had a good time the other night but I could've been wrong.  Maybe he regrets it.'  Jared said nervously.

'Or maybe it was the fact that he just saw you kissing _another_ Beta in your home that got to him?'  Chris asked, sarcasm dripping off every word.

'What are you talking about?'  Jared was genuinely confused and a little mad that Chris was accusing him of cheating on Jensen when they'd only been together for three freaking days.

_ 'Genevieve _ , Jared, on your doorstep.'  Chris raised an eyebrow as if that would make his point clearer.  It didn't.

'What about Genevieve?  She just came round to return the book she borrowed last week.'  Jared explained, Genevieve had been at the house for a grand total of two minutes and she hadn’t even come inside, for Christ’s sake, what was Chris even accusing him of? 

_ 'Right _ , of course she did, Jay, and her being at your home at the exact moment your potential, and terribly insecure, mate comes home from work is a complete coincidence.'  Sarcasm still  coloured Chris' voice. 

'Don't be ridiculous, it was a peck on the cheek between friends, that's all.'  Jared was getting frustrated, now, he'd been friends with Genevieve for years and, yeah, she was a little overly friendly at times but that was all it was.  And Jared would certainly never look twice at another wolf now that he had Jensen.

Chris sighed and shook his head, 'You do  realise that that's not what Jensen would see right?  He already has trouble believing you want him so try and keep your  kissing ex-girlfriends to a minimum, at least until you and your boy are a little more settled into whatever it is you two have.'  Jared bristled at the advice; he knew how to take care of his potential mate even if he could feel the uncurling of guilt spreading through his gut at Chris' words.  'Look, man, I'm not trying to step on any toes here but I know Jensen and I don't want him hurt and I think you're the one that could really do that if you fuck this up.’  The shorter man paused and sighed.  ‘So…just don't okay.'

Jared glared at Chris for implying that he might hurt Jensen but deflated when he  realised that the other wolf really did care for Jensen.  Chris had been a good friend to him and the new werewolf, and despite his own feelings for Jensen, had wholly supported their relationship.  'Thanks Chris, you're right man, I’ll go talk to him.'

'Don't.  You'll only embarrass him; just make sure that your attention focuses on him and how much he means to you.  And try to stay away from Genevieve, we all know she wants you and Jensen can probably see it too.'  Jared nodded.  As Chris turned to leave he looked at Jared with a mischievous glint in his eye, 'And Jared, I will completely support your relationship with Jensen because it makes both of you happy but if you fuck this up, believe me, man, I will be the first in line to look after him.'  Jared nodded again, knowing his friend wasn't completely joking despite his light tone. 

Jared walked back into the house mulling over Chris' advice and determined to make his potential mate feel loved on their date tomorrow.  
  



	14. Chapter Fourteen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Fourteen: Katherine Jenkins- ‘Tell Me I’m Not Dreaming.’ To me, this song really describes how Jensen feels about his relationship with Jared and how Jared has made him believe again and brought him back to the world.

** Chapter Fourteen. **

_ Jared. _

Jared had decided to keep their second date on the territory; a romantic dinner at the restaurant  Danneel ran would be perfect.  Jared decided they'd walk, it was a clear night and they could see the stars shining above them.  

'So how are things going at the clinic, you think you wanna stay there?'  Jared asked, wanting to see if Jensen’s enjoyed the clinic as much as everyone enjoyed having him there.

'Yeah, I really like it, Chris and Misha are great, but I'm not really sure if I should be working somewhere so important, Alpha.'  Jensen replied steadily. 

'Why not?'  From everything Jared had heard, Jensen was doing a wonderful job.  He pitched in and helped out everywhere; Misha had been training him to do simple examinations and take blood and had said that Jensen learned faster than any apprentice he'd ever worked with.  Chris had told him that Jensen was a natural with the pups and that the clinic was running more smoothly than it had in years thanks to all of Jensen's help.  Therefore, what Jensen had just said made no sense. 

'I'm not qualified to do anything, Jared, you really shouldn't leave the pack's health to someone like me.'  He continued sadly, toying with a loose thread on his shirt cuff.

'Well, Misha said he's training you up to be his assistant and that you're learning really fast.  You don't think so?'

'He is, but I'm pretty sure there's someone better that could be helping him, you know; Genevieve said that all of Misha's other assistants had medical degrees before they even _started_ and some of them had worked at practices before they had even joined the pack.  I mean, why on earth would they want me there?  I'm sure there's someone better who can help them out.'  Jensen explained.  Jared could see what it was costing him to admit that he thought he wasn’t good enough to  fulfil the role at the clinic.  But Jensen’s priority had always been other people’s well-being, so it was unsurprising that he put his own wishes aside if he felt someone else could do a better job than him when it came to looking after the pack.  The thing was Jared genuinely didn’t think there was a better person than Jensen to do that, he just needed to convince Jensen of that too.

Jared frowned, what Jensen had said wasn't true at all.  Most of the Misha’s and Chris’ assistants had been a nightmare which was why they didn't work at the clinic anymore.  Jesus, just remembering the mess Matt had made the first day that he'd worked there, it didn't even bear thinking about.  Oh, and Jonathon, he had made the kids cry every time they saw him; politely put, he had been a total and unmitigated disaster.  

It wasn't a problem, the two of them just weren't suited to working in the clinic; Jonathon worked in construction now and Matt was a third grade teacher.  Jared didn't know how Genevieve could have forgotten how horrendous the other interns had been, God, she'd complained enough about them when they had worked there. 

'I don't think anyone could do a better job than you, Jensen.  Misha told me the kids love you and he and Chris love having you work there with them.'

'Really?'  The hopeful lilt to Jensen's voice was so cute, Jared couldn't help but give Jensen a quick kiss on the end of his nose.  The snuffle and quiet laugh Jensen gave in response made him smile fondly at his boyfriend.

' _Really_ , so unless you don't enjoy working there, I'm going to recommend that that becomes your permanent position in the pack.'  Jared had been thinking about it for the last couple of weeks and, after consulting Misha, Chris and Mike on the subject, had decided he would pitch the idea to Jensen.

Jensen nodded enthusiastically, 'I'd really like that, Alpha, I'll stay there...well until someone better comes along.'

'Not gonna happen, Jensen.'  Jared took Jensen's hand and squeezed it soothingly as they walked.  ‘Not gonna happen.’

****

The restaurant wasn't overly busy since mates were often happy to just spend time together at home, so most of the wolves gathered were either friends or courting pairs.  

Jared had booked a table right in the back where he could keep Jensen all to himself and make Jensen feel as comfortable as possible.

Jared picked up the menus and passed one to Jensen.  He scanned the options even though he knew what he was having; he had it every time he came here. 

He looked across the table to ask Jensen what he would like to have and saw Jensen biting his lip.  'What is it Jen?'

'I...I can't afford this, Alpha.'  Jensen whispered, looking down at the table and playing with the napkin by his plate.  Jared knew that Jensen was getting a wage from the clinic now but he also knew it wasn't much; Jensen had refused to take more than he felt he deserved.  Jared had had to be pretty firm with the Beta to stop him from working for free since everyone earned a wage in the pack.  

They'd finally settled on the lowest wage Jared could get Jensen to agree to and Jensen had already started paying Jared rent for living in his house.  Jared wasn't terribly happy about that, he liked taking care of the Beta and, if Jensen became his, it would be his job to look after him anyway.  

Despite their equal status in Jared's Pack's, once any children were born Betas more often than not stayed at home to look after them.  Evolutionally, most Betas found it very hard to leave their new pups at home and most Alphas preferred to go out to work to be able to provide and protect the ones they loved.  It was just the way things worked and there were few who deviated from that social construct.  

He had a feeling, though, that if he claimed Jensen, the younger wolf would still like to work but it would probably be on more of a volunteer basis which Jensen seemed much more comfortable with anyway.

This place was expensive and Jensen's  meagre salary wouldn't allow for a glass of their wine let alone a whole meal.  Jared had allowed Jensen to pay for his own cinema ticket on their last date, despite the Alpha in him screaming at how wrong _that_ was, but this would be his treat. 

'Don't worry about it Jensen, this one’s on me, I asked you so I'm paying.'  Jared stated.

'But, Jared, I owe you so much already; I can't let you pay for this as well.'  Jensen protested, still wringing the life out of his napkin.

'Jen, you don't owe me anything and I like taking care of you, it's my job.'  He said sincerely and smiled when Jensen blushed.  'You have whatever you want alright.'

Jensen nodded but still ordered the cheapest thing on the menu when the waitress came to take their order.  Jared shook his head but let it go, he supposed it was better than when Jensen had needed him to order for him, at least the Beta had made the decision for himself. 

Whilst they waited for their food, Jared asked Jensen about the hospital and what he had been doing there that week and, instantly, Jensen eyes brightened.  He started talking, animatedly, about all the interesting cases he'd seen without a hint hesitation in his voice, like there would have been had the younger wolf been talking about pretty much anything else.  But Jensen had such a passion for his work at the clinic that Jared found he could coax him into talking about the place for hours without Jensen even noticing.  Jared could feel the fond smile spreading across his face as Jensen continued.  It was so obvious that the man in front of him was born to take care of this pack given the way he spoke of every pack member so warmly.

'And, Karen brought little Marissa in again this week and Misha thinks she'll be able to get the cast of much quicker than he had first thought.  She was really excited and she asked me if I'd be there to hold her hand, Jay.'  He looked up at Jared with shining eyes, 'She _really_ wanted me to be there.'

Jared reached across the table and took Jensen's hand in his, 'Of course she wants you there, Jensen.  You know, after her accident she came straight to me to tell me that your signature was the first one she had gotten on her cast.  She was so damn proud.  Marissa said that you held her other hand and that it didn't hurt half as much as it had before you came in to talk to her.  I think she's got a bit of a crush on you actually.'  He teased, and smiled when Jensen blushed and fiddled with his napkin again.  He didn't miss the small smile on Jensen's face, though, so Jared knew that, although the other man was embarrassed, he hadn't gone too far. 

Then they talked about how the students that Jared taught at the gym were progressing; Jared was pretty passionate about his work himself, thinking it important that every wolf be given the opportunity to learn how to defend themselves.  Jensen listened with the same rapt attention that he always did whenever Jared talked.  It was almost addictive to have that kind of focus from Jensen, and Jared tried very hard not to imagine what it would be like to always have Jensen there to listen to how his day had been or to help him sort through the pros and cons of a pack decision.  It was just too early to start thinking about that yet, that didn't stop his mind trying to though. 

Jensen declined dessert, of course he did, so Jared ordered his two favourite things; a slice of chocolate fudge cake and a bowl of honeycomb ice cream.  

‘You have gotta try this cake, Jensen, I swear to _God_ , Danneel is the best baker in the entire world.’  He dug his fork into the cake and held it up for Jensen to eat.

‘I really shouldn’t.’  Jensen bit his lip, looking between Jared and the chocolate cake on the fork. 

‘You really should, believe me, if death by chocolate were really a way to go, I’d die happy after eating this.’  Jared smiled and Jensen opened his mouth to take the piece of cake.  Jared froze as he watched Jensen’s full lips close around the fork and his tongue dart out to lick the crumbs away after.  The moan Jensen gave as he tasted the chocolate was almost obscene and Jared was pleased he’d worn his loose slacks.  

Jensen opened his eyes, ‘Wow, that really is amazing.’

‘It totally is.’  Jared looked Jensen right in the eye hoping that the younger wolf understood that he wasn’t talking about the cake.  The flush told him Jensen did.  ‘We’ll take a couple of pieces home with us to have for dessert tomorrow, here, have some more while I have some ice cream.’  Jared pushed the cake across the table to Jensen hoping the man wouldn’t be able to resist another taste of Danneel’s awesome dessert.  

It was always difficult to get Jensen to eat, the wolf had put on some weight since he had come to the pack, but not nearly enough for Jared’s liking.  He wanted the Beta healthy and happy and he needed to bang out all those insecurities that Morgan put in Jensen’s head.  Plus, with all the extra exercise they were going to be doing on the full moon, Jensen was going to need to start eating like a six foot werewolf again rather than a two inch mouse.

Jared brought his own spoon up to his mouth and started eating his honeycomb ice cream, subtly watching Jensen fret over whether to have another mouthful or not.  He smiled into his dessert when he saw Jensen take another bite and close his eyes at the taste.  It was a pretty mesmerizing sight and, in that moment, Jared was glad he’d gotten them some privacy; enough of the Alphas of the pack were already interested in Jensen but the look of bliss on Jensen’s face wouldn’t have helped to lessen their attraction.  

Once Jared had finished his ice cream he put down his spoon.  Jensen had already put down his own fork and Jared took that to mean that he really wasn’t going to eat anymore.  He’d done a good job on the cake, half of it was gone which was better than Jared had expected. 

‘God, Jay, I haven’t eaten chocolate in years.’  Jensen leaned back in the chair and looked utterly content.  Jared wished he could keep Jensen that way forever. 

‘Well, we’ll just have to make up for lost time then won’t we, believe me I have absolutely no problem having chocolate with every meal.  Misha and I have argued time and time again about whether chocolate is actually a food group and since I’m the Head Alpha, I say it totally is.’

Jensen laughed, a real, honest to God, belly laugh.  Jensen looked about as shocked as Jared was by it and flushed a deep red.  ‘I know I’m freaking awesome.’  That earned him a soft smile from Jensen that sent tendrils of warmth through Jared’s whole body. 

‘Yeah, you really are.’  Jensen said quietly, the napkin in his hand again and the soft smile still on his face.

Jared reached over and pecked Jensen on the lips, ‘Glad you think so, baby, ‘cause I think you’re pretty damn awesome too.’   
  
  



	15. Chapter Fifteen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Fifteen: Barlow Girl- ‘I Need You To Love Me.’ This song describes all of Jensen’s issues and the insecurities he has about Jared’s ability to love someone like him even though he desperately wants Jared to. It also links into him comparing himself to Genevieve and finding himself not good enough but begging Jared to stay with him anyway.

** Chapter Fifteen. **

_ Jensen. _

They were walking home, hand in hand, quietly arguing over which film trilogy was better, Star Wars or Indiana Jones (the newer additions to each collection didn't count in either of their opinions).  Jared was coming down firmly on the Star Wars side whereas Jensen was for Indiana Jones all the way.  

Their conversation was interrupted by someone calling Jared's name behind them.  They both stopped abruptly and turned around to see who it was.  It was Genevieve.  Jensen thought she was a nice person and all, she’d always been pleasant to everyone but him, and he knew that she was important to Jared but he really didn't want to see her right now; he didn't want anything to ruin the wonderful night he'd had.  'Oh Jared, I'm so glad I caught you.'  

Genevieve placed a possessive hand on Jared's forearm, it was such an intimate gesture that Jensen suddenly wished, for the first time that evening, that he was somewhere else.  Jensen ducked his head and walked away slightly, giving Jared and Genevieve some privacy.  

To Jensen's surprise, he felt an arm circle his waist and looked up to see Jared looking down at him tenderly.

'What is it Genevieve?  I'm actually busy with Jensen this evening.'  That sent a thrill up Jensen’s spine and he felt himself blush.

Jensen looked over at Genevieve and was taken aback by the cold look in her eyes aimed solely at him.  Jensen didn't know what he'd done to make the other woman dislike him so much, he had always been polite to her at work and tried to help her out when he could.  As soon as she looked at Jared, though, the look was gone, to be replaced by one that held only warmth and a touch of something else.  Jensen stomach’s twisted when he recognised what it was; lust.  

Of course, the other wolf clearly still wanted Jared even if he _was_ supposedly with Jensen.  Who wouldn't?  Oh God, and how could Jensen ever compete with Genevieve if she decided to make a play for the Alpha?  He felt the blood run from his face as he looked from Genevieve to Jared and was struck, again, by how well the two of them would fit together; both beautiful, both perfect, and both so out of Jensen's league. 

He felt the arm tighten around his waist, and saw Jared looking down at him again.  'You alright, Jen?'  He nodded rapidly, there was no way he would risk looking _that_ needy, not with Genevieve standing there looking so composed.

'Alright.'  Jared didn't look awfully convinced and Jensen kicked himself being so pathetic as Jared turned back to Genevieve. 

'One of the wolves at the Northern Territory Boundary said he smelt a foreign wolf.'  Jensen tensed, that could mean Jeff, no-one from Jared's pack would be all that familiar with the werewolf’s scent.  He might have come back for Jensen.  

'Who was it?  Who was the guard?'  Jared demanded, all Alpha now, and had it not been for the fear of Jeff’s return then Jensen would have been really turned on by that.

'Oh, I didn't catch his name, Jay, he was just filling in apparently, but I said I'd come find you and send you up there to check it out.'  Jensen heard Jared curse softly next to him. 

'I'm really sorry, Jared, but I told him you'd be there within the hour. I didn't realise you were out with Jensen.’  The way she said his name sent a chill down Jensen's spine, no-one said his name like that and he really didn't like it.  'I think you need to go now to make it, sorry.'  She didn't sound all that sorry to Jensen and her eyes betrayed none of the remorse that she claimed to feel. 

'Jen, baby, I'm really sorry but I'm going to have to go and check this out.'  Jared kissed him on the forehead, 'I'll be back as soon as I can and we can have a movie marathon and I’ll convince you I’m totally right about Star Wars.'  Jensen smiled up at Jared, trying to make it as genuine as possible with Genevieve watching him so intensely.  

Jensen understood completely that Jared had important responsibilities and it was something he loved about the Alpha.  The man took his job of looking after his pack very seriously.  'Alright, I’ll see you back at the house later, Jen.'

'Don't worry Jared, I'll walk Jensen back for you.'  She smiled sweetly at the tall man. 

'Thanks Genevieve, bye.'  With that, Jared shifted and ran across the territory to the North. 

****

Genevieve took Jensen’s arm and linked it through her own as she started to direct them back to Jared's house.  'Did you have a nice time tonight, Jensen?'  She asked casually. 

'Yeah, it was great, thanks.'  He _had_ been having a great time until Genevieve had shown up, but, of course, he didn't add that last part.  

'Yes, I remember Jared does know how to show a girl, I mean a _guy_ , a good time.'  Jensen wasn't sure but it felt like he'd just been insulted.  'He took me to Danneel's all the time when we were dating and let me order whatever I wanted, he was always so generous like that.  And, God, he ordered this fantastic chocolate cake that we shared over the table, it was so romantic.'  Jensen bit his lip, nervously, that sounded terribly familiar

'Oh, and we took some chocolate sauce home to have some fun with, you know what I mean Jen?  Of course you do.'  She winked at him and giggled the same high laugh he had heard in the clinic all those weeks ago.  Jensen felt sick; no, he didn't know.  Jensen rubbed the back of his neck, had that been what Jared had planned for tonight but then decided against it after the disaster date Jensen had probably been compared to someone like Genevieve.  

Jensen _had_ felt the date had gone well, that they'd connected on a whole new level but now Jensen realised that was probably just him.  How could Jensen possibly compare to someone like Genevieve?  He felt humiliated; Jared must be wondering why on Earth he had wasted all that money and time on Jensen when he could have been with someone like Genevieve.  The woman wasn't subtle about what she wanted, after all, not if Jensen, as stupid as he was, was able to see her intentions.

'Sweetie, I've been meaning to talk to you.  Jason, who works at the building site down on Maple Street, was talking about you the other day, and I think he'd be interested in going out on a date with you.  I told him that I'd ask you.'  She looked at him expectantly as though actually waiting for an answer. 

'I…but...Jared.'   Jensen pointed off in the direction that Jared had left in.  He didn't know how to explain; she knew he'd just been on a date with Jared right?

'Oh, you and Jared?  Really?’  She stared at him for a moment, an incredulous look on her face.  ‘It’s just I’ve known him a long time and he didn't look all that into...'  She looked him up and down before she caught herself and stopped but Jensen saw it anyway and turned bright red.  She coughed, clearly embarrassed.  

'Sorry…my mistake.  I'll tell Jason for you, you won't have to worry about all that then.  Though you might want to stop making yourself look so available then, Jen; some of the Alphas are getting the wrong idea about you.'  Jensen's mouth dropped open.  What did she mean?  What was he doing?  He subtly looked down at his clothes, they didn’t seem all that provocative to him, and he thought back to his interactions with the other werewolves, how could possibly have been flirting with them when he found it difficult to talk to most of them half the time?

But hadn’t Jeff and Jake always said that there was just something about him that  said he was begging for it?  He swallowed loudly, trying to keep his tears of humiliation at bay.  'Look I’m just saying you kind of send off signals that you want to be mated and, if you don't, I'd try and tone it down a bit if I were you, honey.'  Jensen's blush deepened further, was that true?  Jesus Christ.  And how the hell was he supposed to stop something that he didn't even know he was doing?!

'Oh, here we are, we're back.'  Genevieve said cheerfully, disentangling their arms and waiting for him to open the door.  'See you at work tomorrow Jensen.'  She gave him a pat on the arm and left.  Jensen's shaking hands rushed to open the door and close it quickly behind himself, eager to get away from the werewolf world as soon as possible.  So much for not ruining his night.

****

Jensen, therefore, didn’t see the self-satisfied smile Genevieve had on her face as she walked away from Jared’s house knowing that _no_ border guard had sensed a foreign wolf near the territory.  Nor did Jensen see her throwing away the receipt from his and Jared’s dinner at a restaurant the Alpha had never taken her or any other date before.  She whistled all the way back to her home, it had been a good night for her.

****

_ Jared. _

Jared let himself quietly into the house.  It had taken him five hours to get back to his boyfriend.  When he had made to the Northern Border, no-one could tell him anything and no-one knew the name of the wolf who had been filling in as he seemed to have forgotten to sign his name in the log book.  So Jared had taken two wolves out to search the free territory to the North of their boundaries to make sure that the foreign wolf was gone.  

Neither he nor his chosen scouts could find any trace of another wolf and though Jared was pleased by that outcome, since it meant no immediate trouble would come to his pack, he was sure Jensen would be asleep by now since it was nearing four in the morning.  

Jared walked silently into the living room and was met by such an charming picture, all his irritation drained away.   Jensen was huddled at one end of the couch, a duvet pulled tightly around him, and a book open on the couch next to him.  He’d clearly been waiting up for Jared since the opening menu of the Star Wars DVD was playing on the TV.    

Jared sat down next to Jensen, on the leather sofa, and ran his thumb softly across the smaller man’s cheek.  He was surprised when the duvet-wrapped-Jensen uncurled slightly, moved closer to Jared and curled himself into his side, his face coming to rest in the crook of Jared’s neck.  Jensen fit so perfectly against him that Jared couldn’t imagine any future where this Beta wasn’t his.  ‘God, you have no idea how perfect you are, do you?’  The Beta snuffled against his neck and Jared smiled, ‘Well, if it takes the rest of my life to show you, then that’s what I’ll do.’  Jared scooped the wolf up in his arms, keeping him close, and mounted the stairs.  
  



	16. Chapter Sixteen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Sixteen: Savage Garden- ‘Truly, Madly, Deeply.’ This song portrays how I think Jared feels about Jensen and their future together; he simply cannot imagine that they won’t be together forever.

** Chapter Sixteen. **

_ Jensen. _

Jensen woke up on something soft, clearly Jared had had to put him to bed again; he’d been desperate to stay awake and he hadn’t even been able to manage that.  He shifted slightly and looked at the alarm clock on his bedside table.  Shit!  It was half twelve, he should have been at the clinic hours ago.  Stupid, stupid, stupid!

He jumped out of bed and grabbed the first thing he could find and quickly changed into it.  A knock at the door stopped his whirlwind of activity and Jared entered, a tray in hand.  ‘Sit down, Jen.  I’ve called the clinic, you’ve got the day off.’

‘But...but…’  Jensen had let them down, and after they’d been so kind about him to Jared.  He looked helplessly around the room, he felt like crying; what if they didn’t want him to work there anymore now that he’d shown how unreliable he was?  It was the one thing he could think of that could make Jared proud of him and he’d gone and screwed it up, just like he did everything else.     

‘Hey...hey.  Come on, none of that.’  Jensen felt strong arms wrap around him and pull him into Jared’s broad chest.  ‘It’s alright.  Misha told me you haven’t had a day off since you started working there, Jen.  You know, you’re supposed to have two days off a week right?’  Jensen did know that, but he figured that if he worked longer hours then he could maybe make up for the fact that he was such a poor substitute for the helpers they’d had before.  Jensen nodded weakly.  ‘Well consider this your first day off, baby, and we’re gonna spend it together.’  

That brought their  disastrous date from the night before to Jensen’s mind, or more accurately, Jared’s fantastic date and Jensen’s epic failure to live up to Jared’s past girlfriends.  

****

_ Jared. _

Jared felt Jensen tense in his arms at the suggestion that they spend the day together.  He couldn’t understand that, their date had been wonderful last night, it was the best date he’d ever been on and despite the interruption at the end he thought that Jensen had enjoyed himself as well.  No, he was _positive_ that Jensen had enjoyed himself.  So what was this about then? 

‘Do you not want to spend the day with me Jen?’  Jared asked, even though he was pretty sure that that wasn’t the case. 

Jensen pulled away then, ‘Nonono, that’s not it, it’s just…haven’t you got something more important to do since you gave me all that time last night?’  The first answer that came to Jared’s mind was ‘no, nothing,’ there was nothing that would ever be more important to him than Jensen, even his pack.  It was a startling revelation since the pack had been his priority for years now, but it was true nonetheless.  

Then the rest of the sentence filtered through as he thought of an answer to give Jensen that wouldn’t freak the younger wolf out.  _‘Gave me all that time,’_ as though the date had been purely for Jensen’s benefit, as a favour to Jensen, as if it had been some kind of _chore_ for Jared.  Well, that wasn’t right.   Plus Jared had had to bail out on the end of the evening, as well, and he definitely wanted to make that up to Jensen.  

‘Well, to be honest, Jen, I don’t think we finished the _very_ important discussion we were having last night and I know I just won’t be able to concentrate on anything else until we do.’  Jared said seriously, biting his cheek to keep from grinning at Jensen’s worried look.  Jared held up two DVD box sets, Star Wars and Indiana Jones, and let his grin break out.  ‘Which one do you want to watch first?’

The smile he received was damn near blinding.  Jared put out his hand, and led Jensen down the stairs to the couch, the lunch tray forgotten in Jensen’s room in favour of sweets and popcorn. 

****

Half way through ‘The Empire Strikes Back’, Jared felt eyes on him.  He turned his head to the side and Jensen’s eyes skittered away back to the screen but the man couldn’t help the flush that rose to his cheeks at being caught.  

Jared smiled and reached for Jensen’s hand, giving it a little squeeze.  ‘You okay there, Jen?’  Jensen nodded but didn’t turn his flushed face back to him.  Well, Jared couldn’t have that so he reached over and pulled the smaller man into his side, chuckling at the surprised yelp that elicited from the wolf, until they were sharing the same couch cushion.  ‘That’s better.’  He placed an arm around Jensen’s middle and settled them back down to watch the film.

A little while later, Jared felt Jensen playing with the hem of his shirt and though there was nothing remotely sexual behind the move for Jensen, it was still sending all kinds of naughty signals to Jared’s traitorous body.  

‘I…I’m sorry I’m not very good at dates, Alpha.  I never went on any before I met you but…but I _can_ do better, I promise.’  Ah, so that was what all this was about then.  

‘Why don’t you think you’re good at dates, Jen?’  He asked carding a hand through Jensen’s soft hair, that was fast becoming one of his favourite things to do and it seemed to help calm the younger werewolf, as well, as he consciously leaned into the touch. 

‘I just…I just know that the other people you’ve dated are more…’  He seemed to struggle to find the word we wanted so Jared decided to simply cut this off before it went any further. 

‘Jensen, believe me, not one person I’ve dated has ever made me feel the way you do, alright.  You’re perfect just the way you are.’  He felt the expected headshake against his shoulder.  ‘You _are_ , Jensen.  And even if you don’t see it, everyone else does and, one day, I’m going to make sure you see it too.’  He kissed the top of Jensen’s head and felt some of the tension fall away from the other man’s body.  
  



	17. Chapter Seventeen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Seventeen: Simon and Garfunkel ‘The Sound of Silence.’ Jensen’s facing demons from the past that he thought he’d left behind long ago here. I always feel this song is like looking into oblivion, it feels hopeless to me, and that was kind of what I felt Jensen would be feeling in this chapter; everything falling away just as he’d gotten his life back.

** Chapter Seventeen. **

_ Jensen. _

The last week had been uneventful at the clinic; everything had been focused on making sure that Katie was ready to deliver her pups so there wasn’t an awful lot left for Jensen to do that he hadn’t already done.  So he was sat behind the receptionist desk, twiddling his thumbs, hoping that nobody rang or knocked on the clinic doors.  Misha was off the territory getting more supplies from town and Chris was over at Katie's delivering her litter.  

Genevieve had called in sick so Jensen had been left alone to mind the clinic till Chris got back and he was nervous as hell; he'd been studying with Chris and Misha since he’d started at the clinic and could do some minor procedures like take blood or blood pressure or listen to someone's chest but anything more than that was still somewhat beyond him.  He was really only manning the post; he had Chris’ cell number if he needed him but he was determined to handle this on his own and not call his friend.  That didn’t mean he wasn't terrified at being left alone with all that responsibility.

Jensen was busy filling in the charts left over from yesterday's cases when all the lights abruptly went out. 

'Crap.'  Jensen cursed, figuring the breaker must have blown, and felt along the wall for the supply closet to get a torch.  His night-vision was far better than a normal human's but it was still pretty weak compared to the night vision he had in his werewolf form.  Unfortunately, he hadn’t mastered shifting without the moon yet so he’d just have to rely on his human eyesight.  He fumbled with the door and then grabbed the torch that was on the shelf inside.  Jensen flicked the on switch but nothing happened. 

'Of course.’  He mumbled.  Jensen had no idea where the fuses were in the clinic and decided calling Misha was probably better than calling Chris.  Misha was less likely to be busy and he could just talk Jensen through whatever he needed to do.

Jensen picked up the phone on the desk and held it to his ear to begin  dialling but, as soon as the phone met his ear, he knew something was wrong.  There was no dial tone, the thing was dead; that was strange, Jensen was pretty sure that the phone line wasn't connected to the lights at the clinic.  Jensen went to grab his cell phone from where he had left on the desk only to realise that it was gone.  'What the…?'

This was getting a little too much for him now and he decided that, even if it made him a total girl, he was going to wait outside until Chris got back and endure any mocking he might have to over his fear of the dark.  It was better than standing in said dark as the hair prickled on the back of his neck. 

Jensen walked over to the front doors and pushed, only to find them locked.  He pulled on them and heard them rattle, it was padlocked.  On the inside.  They _never_ padlocked the doors; Jensen didn't even think the clinic had a padlock for them.  Which meant whomever had locked them had brought the chain and the padlock with them.  Jensen pulled harder, panic setting in.

Suddenly, Jensen felt something hot against his neck and the next moment he was on his back writhing in agony. 'Nononono.'  The pain radiated down his spine to his legs and he could feel the tears prick at the side of his eyes as his neck burned at the contact.  _Silver_.  Jensen felt his arms wrenched behind his back, as he was rolled onto his front, and he cried out when the burning sensation flared up around his wrists as the familiar silver cuffs were shut around them.  

'Hey Pretty, it’s been a while.'  Jensen scrambled away from Jake as fast as he could until his back hit the wall, ignoring the pain that shot up his arms at the contact.  'Now that's not nice, Sweetheart, where are all those good manners Jeff and I taught you all those years ago when you were just an insolent pup?'  Jensen shook his head in an effort to clear it, the shock of having silver back against his skin was making it difficult to stay conscious, let alone alert.

'What do you _want_ Jake?'  He tried to sound defiant but it came out rasping as he struggled to breathe through the pain. 

'What I've always wanted.'  Jensen clenched his jaw, he knew what Jake had always wanted, the man had told him enough, and like Hell that was going to happen, especially not now that he'd found Jared.  'You know, I couldn't _believe_ _it_ when Jeff told us he wouldn't share, I'd had my eye on you even before the raid.  We all knew he hadn't really claimed you; it wouldn't have mattered if I'd gotten my turn, but he was one possessive bastard.  It was all I could do not to steal you away anyway.'  Jensen shivered as Jake ran a hand down his side.  'So goddamned pretty, half the guard wanted a go but I made sure they all knew their place and there was no way any of them were going to have you.'

'Jared will kill you if you do this.'  Jensen put as much venom into his voice as possible with fear starting to claw up his throat.

'Jared will, will he?  You sure about that, Jenny?  You _sure_ that after I'm done with you Jared won't finally see what you really are?'  Jake ran his thumb across Jensen's nerve-bitten bottom lip, 'Maybe he could write Morgan off as an asshole, but two wolves treating you that way, using you like that?  And, hey, even I've seen the way the Alphas, here, look at you as you strut across the territory, teasing them every day, Sweetheart.  They all look like they'd like nothing more than to spread you open and fuck you right in front of the rest of the pack.  You think Jared hasn't seen that too, you begging to bend over for any of them.'  He stopped for a moment considering, 'Actually, that's probably why you're still in his house, he's just waiting for you to give it up so he can settle down with that stunning Beta, Genevieve, like he always wanted to.'  

Jensen shivered and not from pleasure; he was sure that wasn't true, the wolves of the pack had been so kind to him but his mind flashed to Chris' proposal and Jason wanting to take him out.  

‘ _You kind of send off signals that you want to be mated’_

But they were just being friendly, right?  And Genevieve, Jared had said, he’d _promised,_ they were just friends, but Jensen _had_ seen them together, hadn't he?  And she was beautiful, much more beautiful than Jensen could ever be.  She was what Jared deserved.  'They all saw what I see every time I look at you, you're a whore, Jenny, and they know your place is on your knees for your Alpha.  Well, it's your lucky day, Sweetheart, Jared might not want you but I'll have you.'

Jensen's eyes widened as Jake pulled his hard cock out of his pants and thrust it towards Jensen's face, 'Now put those cock sucking lips to good use.'  Jensen bit out at Jake, despite the burn at his neck the movement caused, and snarled till the wolf moved away. 'Oh, Jensen, I really didn't want to have to do this but you brought it on yourself.'  Jensen found himself pinned down before he knew what was happening and felt a sharp prick just above the collar. 

Immediately, the world went out of focus and his stomach rolled, nausea flooding his senses.  He tried to stay upright as he watched Jake's face swim in front of him.  ‘That’s silver, darlin’, it's gonna keep you nice and quiet for me, but don't worry you'll still be able to feel everything; we wouldn't want you to miss anything now would we?'  He kissed Jensen roughly yanking his face up to his own.  Jake was right, Jensen _could_ feel everything and despite the fact that his head was screaming at his body to bite down or claw Jake away he just couldn't get his body to respond.  

He felt so helpless, just like he always had with Jeff.  He closed his eyes, trying to escape, but whimpered as he felt Jake prying open his jaws, knowing exactly what happened next. 

****

Jared walked over to Katie's house to greet her new puppies and officially welcome the new additions to his pack.  He loved baby pups, they expanded his family and he always felt particularly protective of them.  He couldn't wait to have some of his very own.  It showed what a good match he and Jensen were; he had seen Jensen with the children of the pack and he was so comfortable and far more relaxed than he was around the adult werewolves.

Aldis let him in and Jared gave him a tight hug congratulating him on his three baby pups.  Chris was standing next to Katie taking her blood pressure while she fussed over her little ones with her free hand.  He was surprised and a little pissed to see Chris there alone, he had expected Jensen to be there too.  He knew the Beta would have loved to have been present for the birth and to look after the new pups whilst their mummy was resting.  

'Congratulations Katie, they’re beautiful.'  Jared stroked each of their little heads gently and the smallest one lapped at his large finger.  He smiled and turned to Chris, 'Where's Jen?  He was really excited about being here with you today, he could barely sleep last night.'  It had been so cute; at two a.m. he had found Jensen sitting on the sofa reading one of the medical books Misha had given him about werewolf pregnancies and births.  Jared had stood watching him as Jensen reverently flicked through the pages.  When he had smelt Jared he’d turned round with a shy grin and told Jared that he just couldn't sleep and Jared sat up the rest of the night listening to Jensen explain everything he knew about werewolf gestation, his eyes alight with excitement.  

'I had to leave him at the clinic since Meesh is out of town and Genevieve called in sick again.'  Jared frowned, he wasn't really happy about that, Genevieve called in sick a lot at the clinic and he firmly believed that everyone should pull their own weight, friends or not; if it happened again he would have to have a chat with her about it.  Added to the fact that she had caused his boyfriend to miss something he was so looking forward to, he was pretty pissed.  

'I'm just gonna call him to come over for half an hour to play with the puppies; the clinic can close up for an hour or two, everyone knows you're here anyway.'  Jared grabbed his cell and rang Jensen's, his frown deepening when the cell went straight to voicemail.  Jensen never turned off his phone, he was obsessive about the fact that he should always be available if Jared wanted him for something.  Whilst Jared didn't want it on for that purpose, he liked Jensen to always have it on him. 

'What's the matter, Jay?' Chris looked up at him, concerned. 

'I can't get Jen on his cell.'

'He never turns that thing off, Jay, Misha and I are always ragging on him about it.  I'll call the clinic, he's manning the phones at the moment.'  Jared watched his friend's face pale as he held the cell phone to his ear.  'There's no dial tone, Jay, nothing, something's wrong.'

Jared already knew that and he tore from the house like a wolf possessed.  He shifted as soon as he was out the door, Chris following close behind him.  As they neared the clinic they saw all the lights were off, the place looked deserted.  Jared wished he'd bonded with Jensen, then he’d be able to tell if he was okay but he couldn’t yet, he couldn't feel Jensen anything from the younger wolf until he agreed to be his Beta.  

Both Alphas shifted back to human form when they came to the doors of the clinic not wanting to scare Jensen if it turned out to be just a power-cut like they both hoped.  Jared placed a finger over his lips and counted down to Chris.  On three, they pushed at the clinic doors only to find them locked.  They were more than locked if two Alphas, one being the Head Alpha of the whole pack, couldn't move them.  

Jared shifted instantly and slammed into the doors and on their third try, the doors gave way and Jared ran into the clinic smelling for Jensen.  He reared back when he smelt blood and the musk of another wolf.  

He shook his head; Jensen wouldn't cheat on him, would he?  He followed the scent and opened one of the exam room door to see Jensen sprawled on his front and Jake on his haunches behind him, fucking deep into the younger wolf. 

'Sorry, Alpha can you give us a minute, Jen and I are nearly done?'  Hurt flowed through his body at the scene before him, he had thought Jensen felt the same way, that Jensen had wanted to be his Beta.  Was it just misplaced gratitude that had had Jensen at his side the last couple of weeks?  Jared turned to leave but a soft, pained whimper stopped him instantly and Jared shifted to his human form immediately.  

Jake's expression flickered only for an instant but it was enough; Jared had seen the panicked expression there.  Jared threw himself forward and flung the man off of Jensen causing Jensen to fall forwards onto the floor with a pained grunt.  Jared took in the silver collar and cuffs and rushed to Jensen's side, kneeling next to him. 

'Jensen.'  Jared said softly and the young wolf turned his face to him, blinking furiously, trying to focus on the voice calling his name.  Jared could see that silver had completely taken over the green irises of the wolf and he was surprised Jensen was still conscious with that amount of silver in his system.  Jared reached out and tore the cuffs and collar off, breaking the latches on both, and burning his hands in the process.  

He watched Jensen sniff the air briefly and then found himself with a lap full of Jensen, 'Alpha.'  Jensen murmured into his chest and he buried his face in Jared's neck, his breath hitching every so often.  Jared was pretty sure that it was only the silver that was allowing him so close to Jensen after everything that had just happened but he'd take what he could get.  He wrapped his long arms around the smaller wolf and tucked him closer into his chest.   
  



	18. Chapter Eighteen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Eighteen: Westlife- ‘Unbreakable.’ This sums up how Jared feels about Jensen; nothing will ever keep Jensen from being his forever. Nothing that happens will ever change the way he feels about the Beta, no matter what Jensen might think.

** Chapter Eighteen. **

_ Jared. _

Once Jensen's breathing had evened out and it was clear that he'd fallen asleep, or passed out, Jared carefully carried him into one of the other exam rooms.  Chris still had his foot on Jake's neck, as Jared passed, ready to break it if Jared gave the word. 

Laying Jensen down, he brushed his dark blonde hair from his forehead and placed a kiss there.  He walked out of the room, strode over to Jake and Chris and brought himself to his full height.  Both wolves bowed their heads at that, feeling the power of the Pack Alpha radiate through the room. 

Jared wanted Jake dead; he wanted to rip the wolf's throat out, but he wouldn't.  Jared loathed taking human or lupine life and there was only one crime that merited the death penalty in his pack and that was murder of a human or another wolf.  Jake had not done so, so no matter how much Jared wanted to kill him, he wouldn't.

'Jake, you have two options here, you can remain with this pack and spend the rest of your life in jail for what you’ve done or you can accept banishment and never come within a hundred miles of my territory.'  Or me.  He thought angrily.

'And what's my crime, Alpha?'  Jared saw Chris' eyes flash and his foot press down just a little harder on the neck beneath it.  

'Chris, no.  As soon as I talk to my guards, you'll be formally charged with the rape of the werewolf Jensen Ackles.'  Jared kept his voice calm and steady despite his wolf roaring to get out and kill the man who had hurt his Beta.  

'Rape?  That what he's saying?  I swear to God, Alpha, he asked me to meet him here, he said he was all alone and that he wanted to have some fun whilst Collins and Kane were away.'  Christ, he looked so sincere; it chilled Jared to the bone since he knew the man was lying. 

'Really?  So explain the chains on the door?  The lights?  And the fact that Jensen has enough silver flowing through his system to knock out a wolf three times his size?'

'Well, Jensen's always been a bit kinky that way.  The chains were already here when I got here, he said he didn't want any interruptions, the lights were apparently to set the mood and the silver?  Well, you'll have to ask him about that, I don't really give a toss how other wolves get their rocks off but he was already high as a kite when arrived.'  Jake explained calmly and reasonably, as though his neck wasn’t seconds away from being crushed by one of the strongest wolves in the pack. 

'That's bullshit, Able, and you fucking know it so cut the crap before I accidently slip and your neck and the floor become real fucking intimate.'  Chris growled at the wolf beneath him. 

'You're right, Jake, I'll have to wait until Jensen wakes up to get the full story so, for now, you'll be placed in custody till that happens.  Chris, can you take Jake away?  Aldis and Matt can watch him for tonight in the cells.'  Chris looked at the door of the room Jensen was in for, just a moment, and Jared felt bad for sending the other wolf away when he clearly wanted to make sure Jensen was alright as well.  'I'll take care of him, Chris, you have my word.'

Chris' shoulders slumped slightly but he nodded sharply at Jared before practically dragging Jake away. 

****

Jared stayed at the clinic for the next few hours waiting for the silver to work its way out of Jensen's system.  It was true that some werewolves took minute amounts of the stuff as a drug but that dose was hardly anything.  Silver was dangerous to them and the amount Jensen had been given, Jared wanted to be near medical assistance if it was needed.  Chris was working in the other room, and manning the reception at the same time.  They hadn't had anyone come in since Jensen had been admitted and Jared was pleased about that, he really didn't want any prying eyes looking in on Jensen right now, especially when the other wolf was still out cold. 

Five hours later, Jared noticed Jensen's breathing pick up and he started squirming on the bed, his hands flexing like he was trying to get his claws out. 

'Jensen?  Jen, can you hear me?  It's Jared.'  Jensen's eyes were still squeezed shut but Jared was sure the other wolf was awake now.  'Jensen you need to open your eyes for me.'  Jared allowed power to lace his words and watched as Jensen's eyes fluttered open to look at him.  Thankfully, they were green again, no hint of silver left within them. 

He smiled down at the smaller wolf and was saddened when the wolf turned his face away from him.  'Jensen, can you look at me please?'  Jensen just shook his head; Jared couldn't imagine how hard it must have been for Jensen to even be in the same room as Jared right now but he needed Jensen to tell him what had happened.

Jared stood up and walked around the table, careful not to touch the other wolf, and crouched in front of him gently catching Jensen's face before he could bury it in the pillows on the exam table.

'Jensen, I know this is hard,' Understatement of the fucking century, 'but I need you to tell me what happened here with Jake.'  The trembling that had racked Jensen's frame since he woke up, intensified, and he shook his head so vehemently that he almost fell off the small bed.

'I can't...please, Alpha, please don't make me, _please_...'  The fact that Jensen had reverted to calling him Alpha, and not Jared, worried Jared almost as much as the shaking but he couldn't let this go.  He needed proof to banish Jake from the pack and he needed to get it now before news got out about what happened and the rest of the pack were out for Abel's blood for hurting Jensen.  He didn't know how many wolves from Morgan's pack would fight with Jake and he didn't want a blood bath on his hands, not when he had to take care of Jensen.  

'Jensen.'  Authority rang through the room with that one word and Jensen cringed away from it.  'Tell me.'  Jensen tried to refuse but Jared knew that no Beta, especially not one as strung out and emotional as Jensen was right now, would be able to refuse that, no matter how much he wanted to. 

'I…I was covering Genevieve's shift as she phoned in sick this morning.'  He looked up at Jared, gauging his reaction, obviously remembering that she was Jared's friend and quickly added, 'It wasn’t a problem, I really don't mind, I mean we were quiet anyway with Misha being out of town and Chris over at Katie's.  I was just sitting at the desk, kind of hoping Chris would get back soon so I could go over to Katie's myself,' Jared saw Jensen’s eyes widen and the man started to get up from the bed.  'Are they okay, oh my God, I can't believe I didn't ask, Alpha, are they alright, Katie and the pups, I mean…?'

'Stop, Jensen,'  It broke Jared's heart how easily Jensen had brushed his own trauma aside to make sure Katie was okay.  Jared loved Katie, as he loved every wolf in his pack, but he loved Jensen more, and Jensen was his priority right now. 'They're all fine, Jensen, Katie had three beautiful puppies this morning.'  Jensen relaxed and smiled for the first time since Jared had entered the clinic.

'That's good.'

'You were manning the phones, Jensen?'  The smile faded from Jensen's lips and he looked tiredly up at Jared.

'I was manning the phones and filling out some charts when the lights went out.  I…I didn't know where the fuses were so I went to ring Misha, just to ask, but the phone was dead.  I didn't think the phones were on the same circuit, you know, in case of an emergency, so I thought that was pretty weird.  I went to grab my cell from the desk where I'd left it before the lights went out, but it was gone.  That creeped me out and...and I decided to wait outside till Chris came back.'  He flushed bright red at the admission.  'I knew it was stupid, but I...I had a really bad feeling and I'm not a huge fan of the dark when I'm alone.'  

Jared didn't think that was remotely stupid since he was pretty sure Jensen had spent the last four years looking over his shoulder waiting for Morgan to pounce on him.  'I tried to pull the doors open but they were chained and I swear I didn't do it, I _swear_ , Alpha.  The chain wasn't there one minute, then the next, it… it just was.  I...I panicked but before I could do anything I felt something hot around my neck and, when I heard the clasp click closed, I knew what it was.  I thought… I didn't even… I hadn't seen them since I left Jeff's, how did he...I didn't put them on myself, you have to believe me, nor the cuffs, I hate them, Alpha, I _hate_ them, I'm sorry for being weak but I promise, I didn't…’

Jensen was getting worked up now and Jared didn't know what to do so he went with his instincts and pulled Jensen into his arms rubbing soothing circles on his back.  'I know Jen, I know, you have nothing to be sorry for,' Jensen tensed before relaxing into Jared's hold.  Jared continued to whisper soothing sounds into Jensen's ear until his breathing evened out and he could continue.  He didn't let Jensen go and felt Jensen's words as puffs of air against his throat. 

'I realised that it was Jake and tried to get way but I had nowhere to go, and he…he said things about…about you and the pack and me wanting it.  But I didn't, I didn't want it at all.  And he injected the silver into my neck.  Morgan used to do it when he was....training me in the beginning and after that I just couldn't fight him.  I know what it looked like, Alpha, but it wasn't, it wasn't like that, you have to believe me.'  

Jensen looked pleadingly up at Jared, begging him to believe him.  Jared still couldn't fathom that Jensen thought he'd take Jake's word over his.  He wanted to know what Jake had said to his boyfriend but Jensen clearly didn't want to tell and he wasn't forcing something that would make little difference to the outcome of Jake’s sentencing. 

'I believe you, Jensen, I know you didn't want it, and none of this was your fault okay.'  He pulled Jensen back to look into his green eyes even as Jensen avoided his gaze.  'Jensen you know I don't blame you for this, right?'

A moment passed and it was too long for Jared's liking before Jensen nodded, meek and submissive, 'Yes, Alpha,'  Not yes, Jared, this was not his boyfriend that Jensen was talking to, it was the Pack Alpha that he didn't want to disappoint or worse piss off enough to be sent away.

'Not good enough, Jen.'  Jensen looked up at him then, questioning and a little afraid, as though his apology hadn't been enough to save him from whatever punishment he felt he'd earned.  Well, Jared would just have to clarify this for him then, make it nice and clear what he wanted.  'You're talking to me right now, Jared your boyfriend, not the Pack Alpha.'  If anything, Jensen looked more confused than ever. 

'You still...'  Jensen clamped his mouth closed, cutting off the thought he clearly hadn't meant to let loose but it was all Jared needed to understand what was going on in his young wolf's mind.

'Of course I still.'  He pulled Jensen down into his lap, inhaling his scent.  'I will always want you Jensen, always.'  He felt a shiver down Jensen spine at that. 'You're my Beta if you want to be.'  They hadn't really talked about it since Jared hadn’t known when it would be best to bring up something like that.  But something told him that now was the right time.  Jensen would know that Jared still loved him, still wanted him, and more importantly that he didn't blame Jensen or think him tainted in any way.  

He heard the hitch in Jensen's voice at the word Beta and knew that it had been the right time.  Jared just held him tighter when he felt the dampness against his chest through his shirt.  'Mine.'  He whispered and kissed Jensen on the temple.  

****

Jared had taken Jensen home once the Beta had fallen asleep wrapped up in his arms.  He put Jensen in his bed, it was larger and more comfy than Jensen’s, and he hoped it sent the message to Jensen that he was Jared's and that Jared would always want him at his side.  Chris sat on the couch with Mike, who'd come over as soon as Jared had called him.

'So did you get what we needed to charge Abel?'  Chris asked, not looking up from his beer. 

'Yeah, I got what I need.'  Jared sighed, sometimes it was hard being the Pack Alpha, but that day, it had been even worse.  He had wanted nothing more than to rip Jake apart with his bare hands but he led his pack by example and always had.  Jared had to think about what was best for the pack and the past had shown him that violence was never the best option.  'He'll be banished, but you know I'm kind of hoping he fights me on it so I can kill him without breaking any of our laws.'  It was true, if Jake initiated a duel, Jared was well within his rights to tear him apart and, by God, he would.  Chris and Mike both nodded, obviously feeling similar sentiments as Jared. 

'How's Jensen, Jared?'  Mike asked quietly.  After everything, Jared wasn't sure how this latest setback was going to affect the younger werewolf.

'Honestly, I don't know.  I don't know if it will set him back or help drive him forward, all I know is I'll be with him either way.'  The other two nodded, even if Chris' jaw was clenched tight as he did so.  'I've asked him to be my Beta, he didn't agree but he didn't shy away, either, so I'm taking that as a good sign.  I think he's going to be okay though, guys, we just need to be careful.'  The other two nodded again and rose to leave.  Mike was gone when Chris turned around. 

'Jared, you're one of my oldest friends, and my Pack Alpha, I'd follow you wherever you asked me to go.'  Jared nodded his thanks.  'But if you hurt him, Alpha or no, nothing will stop me from kicking your ass and opening my door to him if he asks, got it?'  

Jared knew that he had nothing to fear from Chris, not only was he larger and stronger, the pack would follow Jared first and Chris second.  But it was nice to know that although the wolf cared deeply for Jensen, probably even loved him, he was willing to let the Jensen go if that was what made him happy.  Chris was probably as shaken by the events of that day as Jared was and this was his way of dealing with those emotions.  'Got it Chris, and believe me, I'd rather chew off my own arm than hurt him.'  

Chris turned and left, shifting into his wolf form and heading out to the woods, the wolf probably needing some time to himself, now that Jensen was well beyond his reach.  Jared felt for him but he also couldn't help the possessive mental cheer that his main rival saw Jensen as his too.  
  



	19. Chapter Nineteen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Nineteen: Ewan McGregor (again originally by Elton John!)- Your Song. I just thought the lyrics were really appropriate for Jared’s feelings for Jensen.

** Chapter Nineteen. **

  
_ Jared. _

Jared walked over to the house that several of Morgan's inner circle had been staying in since they had accepted his leadership.  He knocked on the door.  James, a large man, opened it and nodded to Jared, 

'Alpha, can I help you?'  The tone was pleasant, most of these guys were like soldiers and just followed orders, regardless of their own feelings for their Pack leaders.  Jared didn't really like it, he wanted to bond with all the wolves in his pack but he knew it would take time for them all to adjust to their new surroundings and while it didn't cause any trouble he'd take what he could get from Morgan's strange pack mates. 

'Is Jake in?'  He asked casually even though he knew that the wolf had been watched all night by his guards.

James nodded and called for Jake.  Jake descended the stairs, easy as you please, and that just riled Jared up even more. 'Alpha, what can I do for you this fine morning?'  It was so reminiscent of Morgan that Jared had to grip the door frame to stop himself from attacking the guy.

'You, Abel, can pack your shit and get the hell out of my territory.'  Jared had meant to be polite, explain what was going to happen, and what would happen if Abel ever came back but a memory of Jensen slumped down in front of the wolf flashed before his eyes, unleashing his inner Alpha. 

Jake seemed as surprised by the outburst as Jared.  'What?!  I don't understand?'

'You're banished from my pack Jake Abel, and if you ever come within a hundred miles of our borders again I will not hesitate to tear your throat out.  Is that clear enough for you?'  Jared snarled. 

Jake just smiled indulgently, 'Is this about Jenny because I told you it was totally consensual, he begged me for it.'  The bastard even had the audacity to laugh when he added, 'He's always been like this, Jared; he was always up for it at Morgan's.  This whole virgin thing he’s got going on is an act, he likes nothing more than getting his ass reamed and he doesn’t care who by.'  Jared didn't even realise he'd moved over the threshold until he had Abel by the neck against the wall. 

'Shut your fucking mouth before I rip your jaw off.  Get. Your. Shit. And. Go.'  He dropped the wolf, satisfied when the man crumpled into a heap at his feet. 'Don't make me tell you again.'  Abel fixed Jared with a glare and retreated back up the stairs to his room.  He came down again ten minutes later with a bag in hand and his coat thrown over his shoulder. 

'You'll regret this, Jared, I'll make sure of it.'  With a bang of the front door the man was gone. 

****

Jared found himself, half an hour later, sitting in the comfy chair in the corner of his room watching Jensen sleep.  He'd rubbed the balm Misha had given him, when Jensen had first come to the pack, into the wounds on Jensen's neck and wrists but they still looked raw and painful.  

Jared's gut twisted at the memory of seeing Jensen in the silver.  He'd given the cuffs and collar to Chris and told him to melt them down; he never wanted Jensen to ever lay eyes on them again, and he could probably go the rest of his life without seeing anything like those again either. 

Jared pondered his proposal to Jensen about becoming his Beta.  He'd known from that first moment that Jensen was beautiful but the desire he had for the werewolf had been overridden by his protective instincts as the Alpha of a pack.  He'd seen a wolf in trouble and had needed to help him.  Jared hadn't known then that he would want to mate with Jensen and spend the rest of his life with him, but he knew it now.  With every day that passed he knew he wanted Jensen to be his. 

But did _Jensen_ want that, would Jensen want to be the Beta of Jared's Pack?  It was a huge responsibility and, at times, that responsibility had weighed on Jared, and he had been raised for this.  For Jensen it would be ever harder since it would all be new to him.  Did he want to be with Jared enough to give up the freedoms that the other Betas had, to have to care for the pack and live up to their expectations?  Did he love Jared enough for that?  Did he love Jared at all, or was it merely gratitude that drove him into Jared's arms?  

This wasn't the first time that Jared had thought these things but, in the silence of the room, the thoughts were so loud they were deafening him.  He was so lost in his own doubts that he was completely caught off guard when he looked back at Jensen's sleeping form to find him no longer sleeping but looking at him with those wide, innocent eyes that always got Jared into trouble.  

'Jared?  What are you thinking?'  Jensen blinked his sleepiness away, and looked all of four years old  cocooned in Jared's huge bed and blankets.

Jared shook his head, now was not the time to voice those thoughts, he needed to be there for Jensen.  He was pleased to hear that Jensen had gone back to calling him Jared instead of Alpha, at least.  'Nothing, baby, how you feeling?'  He rose from the chair and knelt down by the bed running his hand through Jensen's hair, pleased when Jensen closed his eyes at the contact, almost purring. 

'I'm okay.'  He hesitated before continuing, 'Did you mean it? What you said?'

Jared raised an eyebrow in question, he'd said a lot to Jensen in the clinic, he wasn't sure what or how much Jensen had heard.  He'd pretty much offered him everything he had. 

'About being your Beta, do you, would you still want that, even with, even after...?'

'Yes, God yes, Jensen, I want you to be mine but only if you want to be mine.'  It was Jensen's turn to look confused then and obviously it _was_ the time they were going talk about Jared’s offer, for better or for worse.  'I don't want you thinking you owe me anything, I don't want you to think you have to be my Beta just because I want you or because I asked you.  And I definitely don't want you to be with me out of some sense of misplaced gratitude.  I want you to want me as much as I want you, although I hardly think that’s possible.'  

To Jared's surprise, Jensen laughed.  Jared might have bristled at being laughed at had it not been the best sound he'd heard since before this mess started.  Jensen caught himself quickly and choked it back. 

'Sorry, Jared, I wasn't laughing at you.  How can you possibly think that I wouldn't want you?  My wolf wanted you to be my Alpha before I even knew it myself and I knew pretty damn quick that I wanted to be yours.  Jesus, I just can't imagine why you would ever want me when you could have any other wolf in the pack, a wolf whose not...'  He trailed off, biting down on his full bottom lip. 

'Whose not what?  The most beautiful, strong, caring wolf I've ever met?  Yeah, why on earth would I want that?'  Jared grinned, knowing that was not what Jensen had meant and enjoyed the blush that stained the Beta's cheeks.  Seriously he added, 'How could I not want you?  You're perfect in every way, and I love you, Jen.'  He took Jensen's face in his large hands and looked him directly in the eyes, no hiding.  'I love you Jensen.'

A tentative, shy smile graced Jensen's beautiful face, 'I...I love you, too, Jay.'  The nickname washed over Jared like warm honey and settled deep in his belly.  Jensen moved backwards on the bed and lifted the cover, biting his lips nervously again.  Jared looked at Jensen, saw his nerves but saw no fear, no obligation, and climbed into the bed.  They lay face to face; Jared knocked his nose affectionately against Jensen's causing the smaller wolf to duck his head.

'You understand what this means, Jen?  Being my Beta means you'll have responsibilities and the rest of the pack will look to you for guidance if I'm not here.'  He could help train Jensen for that; Jensen had great instincts already and had shown Jared that he loved the pack by always putting them first; he was well on his way to the place he needed to be.  

'Do you think, I mean, I'm not sure, will I be good enough to be your Beta Jared?'

****

_ Jensen. _

Jensen _wasn’t_ sure.  He cared about every single member of his new pack, as he had cared about every member of Tom’s Pack, and he knew that he would readily lay down his life for any of them.  But being the Pack Beta would mean he would have to be smart, think on his feet; people would look to him to sort out their problems if Jared wasn’t there. 

‘You’ll be the best Pack Beta that this pack has ever had.  I know it.’  Jared kissed the tip of his nose affectionately. 

And Jared.  Really, Jared could do better.  Without thinking, he continued his train of thought aloud, ‘But Genevieve has trained her whole life to be your Head Beta, I know nothing, and she’s just so beautiful and perfect, surely she’d…’

‘She may have trained _herself_ to be my Beta, Jensen, but I never wanted her to and I never wanted her as my Beta, especially not after I first saw you.  And you’re right, Jensen, I’ll have to train you up a little on the way Pack politics work but you’re smart as hell so I know you’ll pick that up pretty damn quick.’  

Jensen bit his lip, he really didn’t know anything about Pack politics, he’d been too young to have any say in the way the Welling Pack worked before he had been taken by Jeff and he’d certainly had no insight into how Morgan’s Pack functioned.  ‘Jensen, seriously, you have the most important thing I would look for in my Beta.  Nothing else matters to me.’

‘And what’s that?’  Jensen couldn’t possibly imagine what could make him a good enough Beta for an Alpha like Jared or a pack like Jared’s, ‘Love.  Compassion.  You love me and you love my pack.  You support me in everything I do and you always put the needs of others before your own.  That’s why you’re such a success at the clinic, and that’s how I know you’ll be perfect.’

Jensen nodded, he _did_ love Jared and he would always stand by him, ‘I would Alpha.  I’d stand by you no matter what.’

‘I know.’  Jared gave him one last kiss on the cheek before turning them over and spooning up against Jensen’s pack; one strong arm around the smaller wolf’s body pulling him back against his chest.  ‘I know, baby.’  
  



	20. Chapter Twenty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Twenty: Queensryche- ‘Silent Lucidity.’ This song talks about nightmares and leaving your fears behind and I thought that was perfect for describing how haunted Jensen is. 
> 
> Plus, the scene in 'Heart' when this plays is pretty much one of my favourite Supernatural scenes EVER so I really love this song! Lol!

** Chapter Twenty. **

_ Jared. _

A few hours later and Jared awoke with a start.  He looked to his side to see Jensen struggling in his sleep, his whimpers quiet like he was trying to keep quiet.  Jared knew it wasn’t the first nightmare Jensen had suffered since he had come to live with him; more than once Jared had gotten out of his bed, having heard Jensen shout in the night, to go to the guest room.  But it was the first nightmare he’d had for a while and certainly the first one he’d had with Jared near him. 

Jared turned on his side and shook Jensen gently.  He was surprised when Jensen’s body froze, holding itself completely still; it was more than a little unnerving.  ‘Jensen, baby?  It’s me, it’s Jared, can you wake up for me?’  Jensen still didn’t move, so Jared turned the smaller wolf to lie on his back in a more comfortable position.  Jensen was whispering something in his sleep so quietly that Jared couldn’t make it out.  He leaned forward and put his ear by Jensen’s mouth, 

‘ _Please don’t make me, please, I don’t want to, please, please.’_ It was a continual stream of pleas and Jared pulled away sharply, unwilling to hear anymore.  He took hold of Jensen’s arms and brought them down to the wolf’s sides rather than them being pinned above his head.  He stroked his thumbs across Jensen’s cheek bones soothingly.

‘Jen, wake up, you’re home, you’re safe, come back to me.’  The frown on Jensen’s face wavered for a moment before smoothing out and Jared watched as Jensen slowly opened his eyes to look at him.  

‘Alpha?’  Jared nodded and he hoped that Jensen was awake enough to know that it was him and not Morgan or Abel. 

‘Yeah, Jen, it’s me, it’s Jared.  You back with me now?’  Jensen nodded and turned onto his side offering Jared his back.  Jared frowned, was Jensen mad at him?  Had he handled this wrongly?  He hadn’t really known what to do; he had just wanted to bring Jensen out of the nightmare he had been trapped in.  His frown evaporated when he saw Jensen’s shoulders moving slightly and heard a soft sniffing coming from the other wolf.  ‘Oh Jen, baby, don’t cry.  It’s alright.’  He risked touching his Beta, and Jensen _was_ his Beta now whether he’d claimed him or not, and put a strong arm around the smaller wolf body pulling him backwards into his chest.  Jensen resisted the movement before letting himself be held.  

‘I’m sorry.’  Jensen whispered through his tears, ‘I just…why do you want me when I’m so messed up?’

Jared gently turned the young wolf in his arms so they were facing each other, ‘You’re not messed up Jensen.  You’ve had terrible things happen to you and it’s going to take time and support for you to work through all this stuff.’  He pulled Jensen closer and planted a tender kiss on his cheek, ‘But I’m here to give you both, and I know Chris and Misha are around if you ever think you can’t talk to me or you don’t want to.  But no-one expects you to be all better overnight, Jensen, only you, so don’t ever apologise for not being 100% okay with everything that’s happened, you just gotta talk to me and tell me what you need.  I’ll give you anything you need.’  He finished and kissed Jensen on the other cheek.

Jensen smiled and nodded, even though he still looked a little shaky from whatever nightmare he’d just had.  ‘Do you want to try going back to sleep or should we break out the Ben and Jerry’s and put on a movie downstairs?’

The smile that he received told him that they wouldn’t be getting anymore sleep tonight, Jared was absolutely okay with that, whatever Jensen needed he was happy to provide.  

****

_ Jensen. _

Jensen felt completely off balance his first few days back working in the clinic after the attack.  He could remember everything that had occurred and he didn’t think he’d ever be able to go into the exam room where it had…had happened.  He hated Jake all the more, then, knowing that the man had managed to tarnish something Jensen had loved so much.  He held his head up high though, he wouldn’t let Jake win, not with this, he loved working with Misha and Chris and Jared, God only knew why, was proud of the work Jensen did at the clinic.  There was no way he was going to let Jake stop him.

That determination didn’t stop the chill that went down his spine every time someone looked at him for a moment too long or gave him a sympathetic look.  Jared had sworn that no-one else had known the full extent of what had happened but with Jake’s banishment and Jensen’s obvious absence from the clinic it hadn’t taken long for the  rumours to start flying around. 

Genevieve, especially, seemed to like to bring his thoughts back to what had happened the last time he was here.  It was just subtle hints that she made that jarred him, sometimes causing his hands to shake so violently that he dropped whatever he was holding.  

_ ‘Jensen, stay out of exam room two, it’s still dirty from the other day, okay.’ _

_ ‘Jensen, you still need to get tested before I can let you around any of the patients and certainly before you’re allowed to even touch the younger wolves again.’ _

_ ‘Jensen, you need to cover those burns properly, we can’t have them near any of the patients.’  _

Chris had finally snapped after lunch and had taken Genevieve into his office.  Jensen had heard his voice loud and sharp through the door and had ducked away from the glare Genevieve had sent him when she had come back out again.  At least, the comments had lessened after that, well, so as only Jensen had to listen to them.  

****

Slowly, Jensen regained his equilibrium; he had returned to his own bed after that first night but he’d still only awoken twice from nightmares since then.  Work was also becoming easier for him to handle again.  Jensen found the other wolves had stopped paying him any extra attention and things were pretty much back to the way they had been before it had all happened.  Genevieve was as cold as ever, but she had never been the kindest to Jensen in the first place, so he could easily accept that blow.  

Jared was fantastic, they had gone through a full moon cycle a couple of days ago and Jared had started teaching him to slow the shift and control it.  It had been difficult but without the pain of the first transformation.  He had felt strangely powerful when he had been able to hold back the might of his wolf, even if it had only lasted a few minutes.  He and Jared had run through the woods like they always did until the dawn and their wolves shifted away again.  

They hadn’t really talked about the subject of Jensen becoming Jared’s new Beta, Jared hadn’t announced it, clearly, the man was unsure of how Jensen felt about the subject.  He knew he wanted to be Jared’s Beta, more than anything in the whole world, but wasn’t sure whether he was really up to the challenge. 

He decided there was one person whom he trusted enough to talk to about this and whom he knew would give him a straight answer since they cared about the well-being of the pack almost as much as Jared himself.  Chris. 

So after the clinic closed one Tuesday, Jensen asked Chris if they could walk home together.  Chris, of course agreed, just as he always did when he knew Jensen needed to talk.

‘So what is it Jen?’  He asked Jensen as he locked the doors of the clinic. 

****

_Chris_.

Chris had known the younger wolf had something on his mind; he had seen Jensen hesitantly approach him and quickly retreat all day, it was too damn adorable for Jensen or Chris’ own good.  

‘I…Jared asked me to be his Beta and I don’t know whether…’   Jensen trailed off looking into the distance. 

‘Whether what Jensen?’  Chris asked, even though he knew what Jensen was thinking; the werewolf was an open book when it came to his feelings for Jared.

‘Whether I’m good enough to be his Beta.’  Jensen finished quietly, a light flush rising to his cheeks.  The kid had to be kidding, any of the Alphas would have given their hind teeth to have Jensen as their Beta.  Chris wanted to be angry at Jared for not making Jensen see how amazing he was and that there was no way that he wouldn’t be good enough to be Jared’s Beta but he couldn’t muster the anger.  He knew Jared would have told Jensen time and time again how wonderful he was; Jared was much better with words than Chris was and Chris knew, if Jensen had been his, he would have told the Beta everyday how lucky he felt to have him.   Chris really wanted to rip Morgan and Abel’s throats out right about then. 

‘It’s an awful lot of responsibility, Jensen, I’ll give you that.  But I honestly believe you’re more than capable of being the best damn Head Beta that any pack has ever seen.  You are very responsible, Jensen, I wouldn’t have let you work at the clinic if you weren’t.  Working with us is one of the most important jobs in the pack so I can tell you that you’re more than ready to assume that role and do it well.’

‘Are you sure?  Because I asked Jay, and he said he thought I could do it but he seems to have these crazy rose-tinted glasses when it comes to me; he sees things that just aren’t there.’  

Chris almost snorted, it was completely the other way round; it was like Jensen put on mud-covered glasses and maybe some blinkers and eye muffs as well, when he looked at himself because he just couldn’t see what the rest of them saw.  That Jensen was amazing.  ‘And I knew you’d tell me the truth because you’re a doctor and it’s your job to care about the well-being of the pack so you wouldn’t tell me to accept being their Pack Beta if you didn’t think I could handle it.’  Chris just stood shaking his head as the younger babbled on endearingly, quite unaware of his own allure.  

‘I’m absolutely positive, you’ll make a fine Beta for Jared and we’ll all be proud to have you as our Head Beta.’  It took an effort for Chris to say, even though it was the absolute truth since it didn’t change the fact that it hurt every time he thought of Jensen being lost to him forever.

‘Okay.  Okay.’  It looked like Jensen was working himself up to something and Chris tried desperately not to think about what that something was but he couldn’t help it.  

Clearly, Jensen was ready to take that last step now.   



	21. Chapter Twenty-One.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Twenty-One: Christina Perri – ‘A Thousand Years.’ I had to include this somewhere since it’s such a beautiful song and it really fits into my story so well. It describes the idea of mates perfectly, in my opinion, and so really defines the bond between Jared and Jensen. 
> 
> I wanted Lea Salonga - ‘On My Own’ from Les Miserables in here, as well, to describe how Chris is feeling as he watches Jensen dance with Jared knowing that Jensen will never be with him.

** Chapter Twenty-One. **

_Jared._  
  
Katie and Aldis had decided to throw a huge party to jointly celebrate the arrival of their puppies and their anniversary.  Of course, Jared wanted to go with Jensen but he wasn’t sure how Jensen would react to being at such a large event after everything that had happened.  Everyone knew vaguely what had gone down with Jake and he knew that Jensen felt awkward about that.  

But then again, Jensen had really taken the last few weeks in his stride; he had bad days, of course, and there were the nightmares, but really it was no more than what Jensen had to deal with normally.  And Jared was always there, right by his side, as soon as Jensen woke up, to soothe the younger wolf back to sleep.  So Jared decided to bite the bullet and ask; he had to be at the party as the Head Alpha so he would really like the chance to show Jensen off at the same time. 

‘Morning Jen.’  He said as he walked through the door to see Jensen sitting at the kitchen table, with two slices of toast and a glass of orange juice in front of him, waiting for Jared.  Jared smiled, it was a habit he just couldn’t get the Beta to break; Jensen always waited for Jared before he started his breakfast, be it ten minutes or two hours.  Jensen claimed that he liked talking to Jared at breakfast so was more than happy to wait for him and Jared had to admit he liked sitting down in the morning with Jensen too so he couldn’t really object to the quirk.

‘Morning, Jay.’  Jensen lifted his chin and accepted the quick kiss Jared gave him before Jared sat down and grabbed a plate of his own.  Jared stacked six slices of toast on his plate, pulling the butter across the table.  

‘I was just wondering what you were thinking about Katie and Aldis’ party tomorrow?  Did you want to go?’  Jared asked casually, buttering his first slice of toast. 

‘Um, yeah, I think I would actually,’ Jensen replied as he nibbled a piece of toast. 

Jared felt a weight lift off his shoulders at that, he was pleased that Jensen still wanted to go out and mix with the pack.  He knew how everyone in the pack felt about Jensen and was glad to have had their supportive presence over the last few weeks.  ‘Would you like to go with me Jensen?’  Jared didn’t look up from his plate, but he held his breath waiting, he _so_ wanted the answer to be yes.

‘I…I’d really like that, if you want that, if you think that’s…’  Jared was out of his seat in an instant, kissing Jensen deeply, before taking his seat again and picking up his unfinished piece of toast.  He felt rather smug about how breathless Jensen was when he sat back down.

‘Good.’ 

****

Jared had gone along to the party early to help with some of the preparations, he was the strongest wolf in the pack after all, so it would have been more than a little selfish not to offer to help just so he could stay at home with Jensen.  Plus, Jensen had been really nervous that morning, slipping back into old habits he had broken months ago, and when Misha and Chris had come over, to bring Jensen his tux, they’d told Jared that they would bring Jensen to the party with them.  Jared had wanted to walk in with Jensen on his arm but decided that having Jensen on his arm for the rest of his night was definitely enough to still make it one of the best nights of his life.  

But the party had started over an hour ago and Jared was getting a little worried by Jensen’s lack of appearance. 

‘Oh, Jay, don’t you look handsome.  You all on your own tonight?’  Jared  recognised Genevieve’s voice next to him and looked away from the door he had been staring at for, at least, the last twenty minutes. 

‘Hey, Genevieve.  No, Jen’s meeting me here, he’s just a bit late.’  Jared explained, hoping it was the truth.  He hated to admit it, it made him feel like a bastard, but he would be really disappointed if Jensen didn’t make it tonight. 

‘That’s a shame but how about you entertain an  unaccompanied lady until he gets here then?’  She asked sweetly, linking her arm through his and leading him towards the dance floor.  

****

_ Jensen. _

It had taken longer than Jensen had thought it would for him to get ready.  The tux that Chris and Misha had brought him fit perfectly so all he had to do was style his hair but he was still over an hour late.  If he was honest, that last hour was pretty much spent debating whether he should go or not.  But he didn’t want to let Jared down; if he was going to be Jared’s Beta he had better start acting like it, and that meant he had responsibilities that he had to respect, no matter how hard that was. 

He walked over the threshold and stopped dead when he saw Genevieve leading Jared to the dance floor, her delicate body  moulded to his taller one.  Jensen relaxed though as he watched Jared gently disentangle her arm from his and walk over to the drinks table and pour himself a whiskey.  Jensen breathed deeply and walked forwards into the large room.  

He watched as Jared turned in his direction and saw the dumbstruck look that crossed the man’s face.  Jensen nervously looked down at his suit wondering if he’d stained it on the way over since he was pretty sure it had looked okay when he had left the house.  When he looked up again, though, Jared was right in front of him, and the fire in his eyes took Jensen’s breath away.  

A large hand cupped his jaw and Jared brought his face down next to Jensen’s to growl softly in his ear, ‘Jesus Christ, Jen, you could’ve warned me, almost gave a freaking heart attack coming here looking like that.’  Before Jensen’s heart could shatter, thinking he’d disappointed Jared again somehow, Jared continued, ‘You look fucking amazing.’  

Jensen felt his face heat up in embarrassment and arousal from Jared’s words and his closeness.  ‘I think I better take you out onto the dance floor before I do something in front of the whole pack that we’ll both regret.’  Right then, Jensen was really sure he wouldn’t regret anything Jared did to him, alone or not.

‘Yes, Alpha.’  Jensen said huskily.  

As soon as Jared led him onto the dance floor the song changed abruptly and Jensen only had to look up at Jared to know that it was arranged for him.   Jared pulled a white rose out from the inside of his jacket and handed it to Jensen, it was beautiful and Jensen clutched it tightly in his hand even as Jared took both of them in his. 

‘ _Heart beats fast, colours and promises, how to be brave, how can I love when I’m afraid to fall, but watching you stand alone, all of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow.’_

Jensen risked a quick look at the stage to see Chris singing, the older man giving him a quick wink before closing his eyes again and continuing the song.  Jensen didn’t know what to say, he didn’t know how to react to the way Jared was looking at him.  There was so much love there that Jensen was sure he could drown in it.  He only hoped his own eyes showed exactly the way he felt about Jared, the way he had felt about him ever since that first change.  And even if tomorrow this was all over, he knew he would love Jared for the rest of his life.  

Jared’s soft voice singing low in his ear broke his thoughts away from their future together; he decided to focus on just that night, on what he had right then, for as long as he had it. 

_ ‘I have died everyday waiting for you, Darlin' don't be afraid I have loved you for a thousand years, I'll love you for a thousand more _ _.' _

‘Jen, I’ve waited for you my whole life and now that I’ve found you I will let nothing in Heaven or on Earth come between us.   I’ve never known anyone like you, and I could never have imagined that I ever would but you _do_ exist, and I love you more than words could ever say so please just, please, say you’ll be mine forever.  And I promise I’ll never let you go.’

It was the most beautiful thing Jensen had ever heard and he still couldn’t believe someone was saying those words to him.  Let alone someone as amazing as Jared.  But he nodded all the same, ‘Yes, Jay, you know I’m yours.  Always.’  And with that Jared kissed him, dipping him low, in the middle of the dance floor, regardless of the dozens of shocked eyes watching them and the music still playing the background.  

_ ‘And all along I believed I would find you, Time has brought your heart to me, I have loved you for a thousand years I'll love you for a thousand more.’ _

  
  
****

 

_ Chris. _

Chris watched as Jared and Jensen danced in the middle of the dance floor, during his band's break, feeling his heart breaking just that little bit more.  He was happy for his friends, of course he was, and especially for Jensen, the young wolf looked so happy there in Jared's arms.  

But he ached to go over there and take the younger wolf in his own arms, show him how much _he_ cared for him, and prove to him that maybe he could take care of the wolf just as well as Jared.  Chris _knew_ he could; he would have spent the rest of his life making Jensen happy and been glad to do it. 

A gentle hand on his shoulder caused him to turn around, 'I'm so sorry, Chris.'   He tried to  marshal up a smile and a nonchalant shrug for Misha but knew he hadn't really pulled it off when his friend's expression remained sad.  

Chris sighed and looked back at the couple just as Jensen laughed and ducked his head closer into Jared's chest, 'I know it's awful, Meesh, Jared's one of my best friends, but I can't help but wish that Jensen's was mine.'  Misha was his best friend; they had worked together for years, and been friends even longer than that.  If Chris wasn't alone, he was with Misha and his mate, Vicki, they were pretty much the only people he willingly spent his free time with outside his house.  So, Chris knew he could make that admission to the man without fear of  judgement , even though he was less than proud to acknowledge it himself.

As he watched, Jensen looked up at Jared with a look so full of adoration and devotion that Chris just knew his dreams were not to be, that Jensen had been Jared's the moment they had brought the wolf home.  'But he's not and I just have to learn to accept that.'  _Even if I’m not sure I can_ , Chris added in his head.

'I know you think there's no-one else out there for you, Chris, but maybe if...'

'No, Misha, I’ve never wanted anyone as a mate before Jensen and, to be honest, I really don't _want_ anyone if it's not him.  But I truly am glad that he's happy and if there were a werewolf for Jensen to be with that's not me, I'm glad it's Jared.  He's pretty much the only guy I wouldn't have challenged for Jensen.'  Jared chose that moment to kiss the tip of Jensen's nose, 'He loves him, Misha, he really does and that's what Jensen needs and what he deserves.  Hell, that's the only thing that matters.'

'You know he loves you too, Chris, right?'  Misha said quietly, knowing it wasn't really enough, that it would never be enough.  

Chris chuckled but it held a harsh, bitter edge, 'I know he does, just not in the way I want.  The kid's got a heart the size of Cleveland, even after everything he’s been through; he's…he’s just amazing.'  He finished the statement quietly, almost speaking to himself rather than to his friend.  Jensen _was_ amazing, he had known that within days of meeting the Beta.  

'He really is Chris, I know.'  The sad tone hadn't left Misha's voice and Chris knew there was little that he could do to change that.  They were both happy for Jensen and Jared but would both always be sad that Chris' heart got broken on their way to finding true love.  

'I can settle for being his friend, Misha, I can do that.  It's better than nothing and, honestly, having Jensen in my life as anything is a blessing I’ll never know what I did to deserve.'  Chris turned back to look at Misha then, 'But he can never know Misha; I don't think he ever really understood how much I felt for him, and now it doesn't matter, so I'd rather he just thought of me as a friend.  I won't make this awkward for him nor will I make him feel guilty about my stupid broken heart, it's not his fault that I fell for him and we all know that somehow he'll make my loving him his own fault.  So, please, for your part, can you make sure he never finds out?'  Chris asked his old friend. 

'Of course, Jensen will never hear about it from me.'  Chris trusted Misha enough to know that he would always keep true to his word.

'Good.'  Chris brushed down his pants and subtly wiped his eyes with the back of his hand, hoping Misha didn't notice the gesture, 'I've got my next set to start so I'll see you and Vicki afterwards for a drink?'

'Sure.'  Misha hugged Chris tightly, 'We'll be here for you.'  And Chris knew he meant for more than just the drink.  He was grateful, he was sure he'd need them soon enough.   
  
  



	22. Chapter Twenty-Two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Twenty-Two: Jeff Buckley- ‘Hallelujah.’ I just think this is a really sensual song and Jeff Buckley has a really sexy voice. Plus, this is sort of the moment the whole story has been building up to, Jared finally claiming Jensen as his Beta, and I think this song portrays that.

** Chapter Twenty-Two. **

 

_ Jared. _

 

Jared kissed Jensen once more on the lips and turned to go to his own room when he felt a tentative hand on his arm.  ‘Jen?'

Jensen was biting his lip so hard that it looked like it hurt and he was looking down at the floor.  'CanIcomewithyou?'

Jared smiled, God, the man was adorable.  'You want to come to my bed, Jensen?'

He didn’t like pushing the other wolf but he had to make sure that they were both on the same page before he claimed Jensen.  Nothing would ever happen to his Beta that he didn't want ever again.  Jensen nodded but didn't look at him.  Jared took Jensen's chin in his hand and forced him to look him in the eye.  'Do you want to be mine Jensen?'

Jensen nodded again, the flush of embarrassment on his cheeks quickly deepening to a flush of arousal.  Jared could relate, to be able to officially call Jensen his, and to have every other wolf know it, sent a thrill down his spine.  

'Alright, Jen, come with me,' he took Jensen by the hand and led him down the hall to the master bedroom.  His bed was massive, Jared had had it specially made for him, he was a pretty big guy, after all, six foot five was nothing to be sniffed at.  He led Jensen over to the bed and sat him down on the edge.  Jared could feel Jensen trembling against him; he knew Jensen would be nervous the first time they did this since all of his experience in the bedroom came from Morgan and Abel and neither of those experiences counted as far as Jared was concerned.  He was going to make Jensen’s first time, voluntarily, in an Alpha’s bed amazing, and something the younger wolf would never forget.  Unlike all those other times, everything would be about Jensen. 

'It's okay, Jensen, just relax,' Jared pressed a kiss to the side of Jensen's neck as he pushed the smaller wolf back against the sheets.  He took off his own shirt before pulling Jensen's off, as well, dropping them both to the floor next to the bed and laid back down over Jensen.  He kissed along Jensen's jawline and down his neck, nipping and soothing the pain away with long swipes of his tongue.  Jensen gasped at each bite, his breathing becoming faster and shallower the longer Jared moved over him.  Jared was encouraged by the hard length of Jensen's cock pressing against his stomach.  

Jared continued to lavish attention across Jensen's chest as he brought his hand down between their bodies and began to rhythmically rub Jensen through his slacks.  Jensen let out a high pitched keen as Jared sped up his movements, practically panting below Jared, his eyes closed tightly.  'Jared, Jared,' he panted, 'I'm sorry, I'm…I’m gonna, I'm..'

'Do it Jensen,' he deftly unbuttoned the front of Jensen's pants, stuck his hand into the younger man's boxers and wrapped his large hand around Jensen’s hard cock, 'Come for me Jensen.'

'ALPHA!'  Jensen screamed into Jared’s shoulder as he came all over his hand.  Jensen was panting and trying to catch his breath as Jared pulled down his pants and boxers, dropping them with their shirts. 'I'm sorry, that was...'  Jensen looked away, a blush staining his cheeks.

'Fucking perfect, is what it was Jensen.  Never apologise for letting go with me, baby, I want you to.  No walls with me, remember, nothing comes between us.'  He ran his hand down Jensen's face.  'God, you are so beautiful, Jensen, you have no idea.'  The instinctive shake of the head from Jensen caused Jared to surge forward, his arms resting on either side of Jensen’s head, holding his body over the smaller wolf, as he dropped kisses all over the other man's face. 

'Yes.'  Kiss.  'You.'  Kiss.  'Are.'  Kiss.  Jensen giggled and squirmed underneath Jared.  'Right, now we’ve cleared up that little disagreement, where were we?  Oh right.'  Jared began kissing and licking his way down Jensen's body again, cleaning away the come that had splattered across the younger man's chest.  'You okay, baby?'  Jared stroked a hand down Jensen’s side.

Jensen nodded.  Jared smiled as the younger man began fidgeting as Jared's neared his spent cock.  Jared licked a line up the soft length watching it twitch and try to rise again.  'Oh Jesus, Jared.'  Jensen gasped.  Jared knew he could get his Beta to come a couple more times that night and looked forward to the challenge.

He grabbed the chocolate flavoured lube he kept on the bedside table; Jensen, as a Beta, should be wet and open for Jared, when he was aroused, so he shouldn’t have needed any lubing up but Jensen had had a lot of bad experiences when it came to sex and there was no way in hell Jared was going to hurt him.  

Jared coated his fingers in slick and just as his fingers touched Jensen's hole he engulfed Jensen half hard dick.  'CHRIST!'  Jared braced a strong arm across Jensen's hips to hold him to the bed and suckled on the very head of Jensen's cock, coaxing the length back to hardness as Jensen babbled nonsense above him. 

'Jay...oh my God...I don't...you don’t have…oh…oh'  Jared smirked at the incoherency of his mate.  He pushed a long finger inside Jensen, meeting no resistance, Jensen's natural lubrication and body's willing reaction to Jared letting the finger in easily.  He added a second and felt Jensen tense for an instant.  He left his fingers there, unmoving, 'Jensen, it's okay, it's me, Jared, you okay?'

'Yeah, Jared, sorry, yeah, I'm good.’

'Don't be sorry, Jensen, just let me know if you need to stop and we will.'  Jared waited for another moment, but when Jensen didn’t ask him to stop and to Jared’s surprise he felt Jensen pushing his own hips down onto Jared’s finger.  Jared looked up at his mate to see his eyes closed, his mouth open slightly, and Jared was almost positive the Beta didn’t know he was unconsciously fucking himself down on Jared’s finger.  God, if that didn’t only make Jared even harder, his shy, innocent little Jensen wantonly grinding himself down on Jared’s hand without even knowing it.

Jared smirked and quickly took his fingers all the way out and plunged them back in starling a gasp, which ended in a low moan, from Jensen at the expected move. Jared bent his head and went back to suckling the head of Jensen's cock as he crooked his fingers, once, then twice, looking for that special spot which would drive Jensen wild.  

Jensen arched off the bed, 'What the...'  Jared smirked and kissed the inside of Jensen's thigh.  He crooked his fingers again, enjoying his Beta's obvious enjoyment and bewilderment at his ministrations.  Jared crooked his finger and combined it with taking Jensen's cock deep down his throat and sucking hard.  Jensen was writhing on the bed, clearly torn between trying to rut his cock deeper into Jared’s mouth or pushing back onto Jared fingers as they pressed relentlessly at that place inside him. 

‘Jared…Jared…I don’t know what….’  Jared smiled and sped up the pace of his fingers against Jensen’s prostate, pressing hard and fast over and over again, knowing his Beta was near the edge already.  All it took was Jared pulling off Jensen’s cock and biting down hard on his inner thigh and Jensen came again with a shout as Jared brought his hand down to squeeze and work Jensen’s cock through his orgasm.  

Jared prowled up the bed and laid down next to Jensen on the bed as Jensen lay still with closed eyes and fast breaths, his skin flushed with arousal and exertion.  'You good baby?'

Jensen opened one eye to look at Jared, and smiled lazily.  Oh God, Jared could wake up every day to that shy smile and he really hoped he was going to get the chance to.  'I'm awesome Jay, that was…thank you.'  He kissed Jared on the cheek before turning and nuzzling into Jared’s chest.  Jared brought his arms around his Beta’s smaller body and held him as Jensen drifted off to sleep.

After a few minutes quiet, Jared was surprised to hear Jensen's voice, barely above a whisper, break the silence in the room, 'Jay, I want…will you make me yours?'  Jensen didn’t remove his face from Jared’s chest as if he was afraid of seeing rejection in Jared’s eyes (as if!), 'Please alpha, if you want me, make me yours.'

Jared had a brief moment to think that he had thought of Jensen’s as his for months before this but Jensen asking for it in their new bed, and well that just spoke to the Alpha in him.  He guided Jensen onto his back again and draped his larger body over him again, effectively pinning the other man to the bed and growled, 'I'll make you mine alright, Jensen, and everyone will know.  Everyone will to able to _smell_ my claim on you.  Do you want that Jensen?  Do you want everyone to know that after tonight you're mine and that no one else will ever get to have you?'

'Yes, yes Alpha, I want that.  I want to be yours, only yours.'  Jensen replied breathlessly. 

'Good, ‘cause I've wanted you for so damn long that I don't think I could let you go now.'  He kissed Jensen deeply, only breaking away to allow them both to catch their breaths.  Jared stood up and shucked off his suit pants and boxers before settling back down above his Beta.  'You sure you want this Jensen, because we can now stop if you need to?'  He asked one last time since, after this, there was no turning back in Jared’s mind, for either of them.

'No! Jared, I need this, please, Alpha, I need you.'  Jensen grabbed onto his shoulder as though he thought Jared was going to leave him; well he clearly didn’t realise what an advertisement for sin he was lying against the black sheets of Jared’s bed.  Jensen’s desperate plea was all the encouragement Jared needed before he was lining up and pushing inside the tight heat of his Beta.  Jensen’s breath hitched for a moment but when Jared looked at him, Jensen’s face was such a picture of bliss he was sure he wasn’t hurting the man underneath him. 

Once he was fully sheathed inside his mate Jared took in his fill of Jensen; his smooth pale skin standing out against the dark sheets making him look almost ethereal and so damn beautiful he was almost painful to look at.  He kissed Jensen passionately as he pulled out and thrust back in, hard.  

‘Open your eyes Jensen, look at me.’  Jared commanded, Alpha tone out in full.  Jensen gasped at the order and Jared smiled when he saw his Beta’s cock twitch, clearly his Beta liked a little dominance in the bedroom, Jared could work with that. Jensen’s eyes flew open instantly, his pupils completely blown, the stunning green irises swallowed up by the dark pools in the centre of his eyes.  

Jared changed his angle on the next few thrusts, looking for that spot again and knew he'd found it when his last thrust brought a sharp cry from his Beta. 'Ah! Oh god! Alpha, harder, take me harder.  _Please_.'

Jared growled at the request and slammed into his Beta again and again.  He felt his knot forming not long after and he started to shallow his thrusts until he was grinding against Jensen's body.  Jensen shifted away, his eyes darting up to Jared’s instantly, looking scared.  Jared stroked down Jensen’s sides again and watched the Beta’s long eyelashes flutter in pleasure, ‘It’s alright, baby, it’s just my knot, you can take it, just relax.’  Jensen nodded, his trust in Jared implicit, and Jared saw the fear fade out of his eyes again. 

Finally, they were tied and Jared reached down to his mate's hard cock and pulled twice, watching as Jensen came again, squeezing deliciously on Jared's knot, driving his own orgasm over the edge.  He released his seed into his Beta.

'Alpha, oh god, I can…I can feel you _in_ me, filling me up.'  Jensen gasped.  Jared knew they'd be tied for at least an hour and settled down behind his mate, wrapping a strong arm around Jensen’s waist and spooning his smaller body, 

'God, I love you Jensen, so much, I don't know what I'd do without you.'

'I love you Jay, thank you for...for everything.'  Jensen turned to look over his shoulder and kissed his Alpha before he fell asleep curled tightly in Jared's arms with Jared knot's still pulsing inside him.  

Jared stayed awake until his knot deflated enough for him to pull out, he had waited too damn long to have Jensen that he wasn’t willing to waste any time on sleep just yet.  When he did, he was careful not to awaken his sleeping mate as he walked to his bathroom to get a damp cloth.  He drew it lightly over his mate's body, they could shower properly in the morning, and Jared's cock jumped at the thought of the fun they could have with that scenario, he had a _really_ big shower. 

As he cleaned Jensen, he saw his come dribbling out of his mate's hole.  A shiver passed through him as a fierce possessiveness swept over him.  This beautiful wolf in his bed was _his_ and there was no way he was ever letting him go. 

He climbed back into the bed behind his Beta, nuzzling at the younger wolf's neck and breathing in their combined scents. 

Perfect.  
  



	23. Chapter Twenty-Three.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Twenty-Three: Sarah McLachlin- ‘Full of Grace.’ This song is full of despair and loss which is just how Jensen feels now that he’s lost Jared to Genevieve. Plus, I also think it describes someone leaving which is exactly what Jensen has done, unable to see Jared move on with someone else.

** Chapter Twenty-Three. **

_ Jared. _

Jared felt on top of the world, he had known for months that Jensen was his true mate but to have his own wolf, Jensen, and Jensen's wolf all acknowledge it left him with a wonderful feeling.  Jared had left Jensen asleep in bed when he'd gone out for breakfast supplies to Mike’s; there was no way he and Jensen were leaving their room that day, and maybe not the next either, hell they might just _have_ to take the rest of the week off, so Jared was going to have to make sure they were all stocked up.  Plus he and his Beta were going to need to keep their energy levels up for everything he had planned. 

Jared greeted other members of the pack as he passed them, wondering if they could smell Jensen on him in the fleeting seconds they were close, and found himself hoping they could.  Jensen was his now and he wanted everyone to know it. 

****

_ Jensen. _

Jensen rubbed his eyes against the slant of sunlight coming in through the window and smiled remembering the previous night.  He rolled over to find his mate, his Alpha, only to be met with an empty bed.  Jensen placed his hand on the bedding, and found it cold; Jared had clearly been gone for a while.  Something cold and heavy settled in Jensen's gut.  Old words tumbled through his head, unbidden and unwanted, but unstoppable. 

_ 'That's probably why you're still in his house, he's just waiting for you to give it up then he can settle down with that stunning Beta, Genevieve, like he always wanted to.' _

_ 'There's a good boy, this is all you're good for, Jensen, you hear me.' _

_ 'On your knees, Green Eyes, get used to that ‘cause that's the place you’re gonna be spending an awful lot of time.' _

Jensen shook his head, trying to rid it of the voices of the past.  Jared wouldn't do that to him, he had said he loved him, he wanted him to be his Beta, right?  Jensen decided that he would just go and find him; he didn't like being all that far from Jared right now, anyway, not so soon after he'd been claimed.  He was sure Jared wouldn't mind if he went out to look for him.

Jensen got dressed and walked outside asking the other wolves he met whether they'd seen Jared this morning.  He got a few sly smiles that Jensen didn't understand but, at least, found out that Jared was down at the grocery store.  Oh, that made Jensen feel better, he had planned to go out himself later and restock Jared's, no, _their_ kitchen.  

Jensen walked quickly towards the store, almost running in his eagerness, the prospect of seeing Jared adding a bounce to his step that he hadn't felt in years, if ever.  He bounded through the doors but stopped dead when he saw Jared with Genevieve wrapped in his arms, her head buried against his chest, her hands gripping tightly at Jared's back.  Right where Jensen thought he was meant to be.  Jared was looking down at her and though Jensen couldn't see his face, from the entrance of the store, he was sure of the fond expression on it.  

Oh God, he was so stupid, how could he have possibly thought he could match up to someone like Genevieve?  She’d known Jared his whole life, and she was beautiful and smart and a million other things that Jensen could never be for Jared.  

Jensen turned and ran out of the store unaware of the calculating eyes following him and the evil smile that graced the watcher's face.  Ten minutes away from the store, he heard someone calling his name.  He wiped at his eyes, furiously, not wanting anyone to see him cry, and turned to the wolf.  It was Genevieve, the very last person he wanted to see right now.  Jensen didn’t blame her for his inadequacies but that didn't mean he wanted to see her either.

'Jensen, honey, I'm sorry you had to see that.'  The smile she wore was apologetic and the look in her eyes was far kinder than he had ever seen directed at him by her.  'I know Jared should have told you about us, about the baby, but...'  Jensen's head shot up at the mention of a baby, oh my God, Genevieve was _pregnant_ , 'But I begged him not to, not till I'd moved in this weekend.'  Jensen swayed slightly on the spot, his whole world was crashing down; Jared must have claimed Genevieve as his Beta if she was pregnant, it was biological fact that werewolves couldn’t impregnate anyone but their mates, and…and she was moving into their home, no, _Jared's_ home.  

God, Jared must have wanted him out already; he must have gone out this morning to give Jensen time to pack up his stuff so that it wasn't awkward.  Jensen was so stupid, filled with romantic notions of being with Jared forever, having Jared's pups, being Jared's Beta.  It was laughable looking at Genevieve's stunning face. 

'I...I…I've got to go.'  With that, Jensen sped back to Jared's house to pack his things.  He was gone five minutes after crossing the threshold and across the Padalecki border in under an hour.

****

 

_ Chris. _

Chris watched Jensen literally run off after talking to Genevieve and he knew that  signalled nothing good. 

'Genevieve, what were you and Jensen just talking about, he looked a little freaked when he left?'  Chris asked, he disliked the woman immensely, she had been trying to get her claws into Jared and claim that position as Head Beta from day one and she didn’t care who got in her way.

The smile he received didn't comfort his fears, and only made the knot in his stomach grow.

'What?  Me?  Nothing, I was just congratulating him and Jared on becoming mates, that’s all, they're both very lucky and I'm really happy for them.'  Chris narrowed his eyes, none of that rang true for Genevieve Cortese who had been in love with Jared, and his Pack Alpha status, all these years.  He wondered what she'd really said to the boy to make him run off like that, and knowing Genevieve like he did, he didn't think it was going to be pretty.  He'd have to talk to Jared.  A moment later, there was a shout to his left and Misha came running to his side. 

'Chris, there's been a fire, we need you at the clinic,' he pulled on Chris' sleeve, 'Come on, man, we need to hurry.'

The injuries weren't quite as bad as they had been expecting but they were serious enough to push talking to Jared about Jensen to the back of Chris' mind for the time being.  Really, how much could possibly happen in a couple of hours?  Chris got his answer later; a whole hell of a lot when Jensen was involved.

****

_ Jared. _

Jared had been surprised, to say the least, to find himself with an armful of a, clearly, very distressed Genevieve half way up the dairy aisle.  He wasn't hugely happy about it but his friend seemed genuinely upset and he'd comfort her as best as he could.

'What is it Genevieve?  What's the matter?'  Jared asked, hoping it was an easy fix so that he could get back to his warm, snuggly mate.

'It's…it's Mark, he won't leave me alone, he…he was outside my house all night last night and I couldn't get any sleep at all worrying about it.  He…he keeps phoning me and sending me letters and I keep asking him to leave me alone but he…he just won't.  He's everywhere I go, Jay,' he bristled at the nickname as it reminded him of Jensen waiting at home for him, 'I need you to go and talk to him for me.  He’ll listen to you.'  

Jared sighed inwardly, he wanted to get back to Jensen and their bed, like every other happily mated couple would be able to do in their first few days of mating, but he _was_ the Head Alpha and if a pack member specifically asked for his help he had to give it.  Jensen would understand that; they had had this talk about responsibilities of the Head Alpha and Beta and Jensen had understood and agreed with all of it, just as Jared had known he would. 

'Alright, Genevieve, let me finish here, give Jen a ring and then I'll be over okay.'  Genevieve's eyes narrowed for just an instant before her expression cleared and she nodded.  Jared paid for his purchases and grabbed his cell. 

'Hey, Jen, I have to go and sort out a problem on Baker Street, I'll be back in a couple of hours.'  He dropped his voice lower so that not even the werewolves in the store could hear him, ‘Get comfy in that bed ‘cause once I get back you aren’t leaving it for the rest of the week.’  Jared put away his phone, chuckling as he thought of the blush that would rise to Jensen’s cheeks when he listened to that message.  Jared figured Jensen was still just asleep, it had been a long night for his Beta.  He most certainly didn’t think Jensen was crossing his territory’s Eastern border and taking himself out of Jared's reach forever.   
  



	24. Chapter Twenty-Four.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Twenty Four: Faith Hill. ‘Come Home.’ The name’s pretty self-explanatory; Jared needs Jensen to come home to him.

** Chapter Twenty-Four. **

_ Jared. _

Two hours later, Jared was sat in Genevieve's front room understandably confused and more than a little irritated.  Genevieve said that Mark wouldn't leave her alone, Mark said Genevieve had asked him out and invited him round last night.  Mark said he wrote no letters, Genevieve said she had burned them all.  It was like some sort of weird tennis match except there was a point to a tennis match, but with this, neither of them had anything to gain by lying and yet their stories detailed completely opposite events.

'Right, so let me get this straight, Genevieve, you asked Mark out and Mark you, said yes, and now, you, Genevieve want to break it off and Mark, you, won't let her?'  Jared tried to sum up the situation for the third time in the last hour, becoming more frustrated as the minutes ticked by and he _still_ wasn't tucked up in bed with his Jensen.

A high, resounding 'Yes' from Genevieve countered a deep, louder 'No' from Mark. 

'You know what Genevieve, I have no idea what game you're playing with me but you want out, that's fine with me, I'm done here.'  Mark stood up, looking angry and confused, and walked out of the house.  And, wow, didn’t that just make all of this feel like a huge waste of Jared’s time. 

'Oh thank you, Alpha, I feel so much safer now you're here.'  Genevieve put a hand on his arm stroking it softly.  The gesture was far too intimate for Jared to be comfortable with so he rose from the couch and distanced himself from the other wolf.

'Well, if that's all, I need to be getting back.'  He said moving towards the door, anticipation and excitement stirring in his belly at the thought of what awaited him at his house.  He wondered if Jensen had stayed in bed all this time like Jared had told him to, the very idea had Jared half hard in his pants.

'Thank you Jay.'  Genevieve rose on her tip toes and grabbed Jared by the back of the neck and kissed him.

Jared pushed her away just as the door banged open to the house. 

'What the hell...'  Jared started as Chris yelled at him, 'What the fuck are you doing Jared?!'

'Nothing, I..'  The punch was not unexpected but it still hurt like a  sonovabitch .

Jared put his hands up to Chris, trying to  placate him and save himself from another punch to the face , and turned to Genevieve, 'You know I'm with Jensen, Genevieve, you can't do things like that, _he's_ my Beta now.'

'But he's gone, Jay, he told me he was leaving, that he couldn't take the pressure of being the Pack's Beta… not for you.'  She answered, as though he should already know that information which he fucking well didn’t.  

Jared didn't have the presence of mind to try and find out why Genevieve thought she knew something about his mate that even he didn’t know, he just needed to go find Jensen.  He needed to make sure that he was where Jared had left him, snuggled and warm and waiting for Jared to come back.  Waiting for Jared to show him how much he loved him.  

Jared tore from the house, running back to his own.  He changed into his wolf form cutting down the time it took to get home by half and crashed through his front door.  Shifting back into his human form and grabbing a pair of sweats, that were kept by the door in case of emergencies, he ascended the staircase three steps at a time and threw himself into the master bedroom. 

No Jensen. 

'Jensen!'  He shouted but was met with resounding silence.  Then he noticed the perfectly made bed, the neat pile of clothes on the chair and the note on the pillow.  Oh please, God no.  His hand was shaking when he reached out to pick up the piece of paper.

 

** Jared,  **

** Thank you so much for everything you've done for me, you'll never know how much it means to me.  You took me in when I was broken and put me back together again when I thought there was nothing left.  You saved me.  But you don't owe me anything, you deserve so much more than a damaged, second rate Beta and you've found her, I'm so happy for you.  I wish you and your family every happiness, Jay. **

** I love you , **

** Always and forever.  **

** Jensen. **

'Oh God.'  Jared whispered as he crumbled the note in his hand and pressed it to his heart.  He fell forwards onto the bed; the sheets still smelled of Jensen and he breathed in the other man’s scent greedily, wondering what on Earth had happened.   
  
  



	25. Chapter Twenty-Five.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Twenty-Five: Gavin Rossdale. ‘Love Remains The Same.’ Jared just wants to be wherever Jensen is; he just needs to find him. The distance between them can’t diminish their love.

** Chapter Twenty-Five. **

_ Jared. _

Chris came dashing into the bedroom after Jared to find him still on the made bed with the letter clutched in his hand.

'Jensen?'  Chris choked out. 

'Gone.  He's gone Chris and I don't even know why.  Everything was perfect this morning when I left to go to the store and now…he's just gone.  I've searched for his mind but we haven't been mated long enough for me to get a clear read on him.  He just feels lost.'  To be honest, that might just have been Jared tapping into his own feelings of untethered loneliness, he felt bereft without Jensen, without his Beta by his side. 

'Well that doesn't matter right now, Jared, you need to get up and find him, we can ask him why the hell he left once we damn well get him back.  And after I beat his hide for worrying us so much.'  Chris growled at the end.

Chris was right, what the heck was Jared doing wallowing in self-pity while his mate was out there somewhere, alone, getting further out of Jared's reach by the minute.  'You're fucking right, Chris, get me anyone who's on a day off today and set me up a search party.  I'm gonna go find Misha, tell him what happened and see if he's got anything that'll help me track down Jensen faster.'  Chris nodded and sprinted out the door. 

****

They meet back at Jared's an hour later.  Misha wasn't there; he was going to stay and man the clinic in the absence of both Chris and Jensen.  With Chris came Aldis, Brock, Danneel, Sandy and some of the older wolves of the pack; Aldis and Danneel were two of the best trackers in his pack and if anyone but him was going to be able to track down Jensen it would be one of them.  

'Right, I've brought some of Jensen's clothes so you guys can get his scent.'  Jared passed round some of the clothes from his laundry bin, thanking God that he had put off doing the laundry.  He really didn’t like the idea of the other wolves smelling his mate but if it was a choice between that or never seeing Jensen again he would just have to put his possessive instincts on a damn time out for now. 

'The scent should be fresh.  I won't lie, this is gonna be hard, he could have gone in any direction and he's got at least half a day's jump on us.'  He didn't add that if Jensen had manage to change into his wolf form he could be miles away by now, Jensen was a fast runner, Jared had seen it that first change and had never regretted that fact until then.  

But Jensen was still having trouble calling the wolf at will, needing to really concentrate to manage it, so hopefully he had remained in his human form for the time being.  Also, if Jensen had passed through any of the waterways in the woods, his scent was going to be greatly diminished.  

'Right, we’ll meet back here at nightfall, that gives us about six hours to look for him tonight; you guys find anything, _anything,_ that might be useful, bring it back to me.'  He looked round at all of them, 'He's out there somewhere guys and we're going to find him.'  _I'm going to find him_.

****

Eight hours later, the sun had gone down and nobody had found anything of Jensen on their first sweep.  Closer to his borders, Jared had picked up traces of the younger wolf but they had quickly been eaten up by the other scents of the wilderness.  He sat morosely at his kitchen table, idly pulling on the jumper that Jensen had worn the day before he had left.  He could already smell the scent growing fainter, and it broke his heart; it felt like he was losing Jensen all over again. 

No one had found anything significant.  There had been a few tracks clearly left by a werewolf of Jensen's size but the trail had run cold before any of them had found anything else.

A knock on the door brought Jared out of his reverie and he moved to answer it.  He would have preferred to have left it but it could be someone with news of his mate or, God help him for being an optimist, it could _be_ his mate.  Jared tried to hide the disappointment at seeing Genevieve on his doorstep, but suspected he failed; he wasn’t really up to trying too hard right now.  She threw her arms around his neck, rubbing soothingly at his back. 

'How you doing Jay?'  She asked calmly, as though he was suffering from a bad stomach bug rather than having just lost of the love of his life.

He wanted to rage at her, how did she think he was doing?  He'd spent his entire life looking for someone like Jensen, only to find him, claim him and then lose him all over again.  Jared reigned in his anger though; it wasn't Genevieve's fault that Jensen had run. 

'I'm not doing so good, I'll be better when I get Jensen back.'  Jared wouldn’t even consider the possibility that he wouldn’t see Jensen again; he would spend the rest of his life searching for him if he had too.  Everything else be damned.

She sighed and led him over to the couch to sit them both down.  'I don't think he's coming back, Jared, he told me that he didn't want the responsibility of being your Beta, that he wanted to be a kid for just a little longer since he never got the chance before.'  

The words tore at Jared's heart.  Jared would have waited until Jensen was older before asking him to  fulfil his role if it would have made Jensen feel better.  To be honest, he would have let Jensen be his Beta without assuming any of the responsibilities that came with that; the bottom line was, Jared would have done anything for him.  But Genevieve wasn’t done and that clearly wasn’t the worst way he had failed his Beta.  ‘He said you were too demanding, and, I can't believe I'm saying this to you, but he said you were just like Jeff.'

Jared gasped in total shock.  Did Jensen really think he was like Morgan?  Had he taken advantage of Jensen in his vulnerable state?  He felt his fisted hands eased away from his chest and the jumper loosened from his grasp.  Jared frowned as Genevieve dropped the sweater to the floor and subtly nudged it under the couch with her foot, 'I know it's hard to take in, Jared, but I just don't think Jensen was the wolf you thought he was.'

'What do you mean?'  Jared asked, eyes narrowed at the implication that Jensen was anything less than utter perfection.

'Well, it's not really my place to say.'  Like that had ever stopped Genevieve before, Jared thought meanly, then berated himself for it, no matter how true the statement was. 

'He was always complaining that you were crowding him, Jay.  I know it's _crazy_.  And the day before he got locked in the clinic with Jake,' Jared shivered at the memory, 'I caught him stealing pills from one of the examination rooms.'  Genevieve bit her lip.  'I wasn't going to say anything, it only happened a couple of times, and you were just so smitten with him.  But, it seems that now you should really know what he was like.'  She placed a hand on Jared’s knee, 'So you can move on Jay.  He was damaged Jared, he couldn't have been the Beta for the pack, he didn't deserve yo...

_ 'I'm damaged Jared.' _

_ 'I don't think I could be the Beta for your whole pack?' _

He’d heard all those words before but from Jensen's mouth.  Had Jensen first heard them from Genevieve?

'I can do that for you though, Jay, I've trained to be your Beta my whole life, I'm ready, and I love you more than anything.  I can be your Beta, someone who you and the pack can really be proud of.’

_ 'But...but Genevieve, she's trained to be your Beta,' _

_ 'Genevieve, she loves you and she's really beautiful.  She'll make you and the pack proud Jay.' _

Understanding dawned on him and he couldn't believe he'd been so blind.  Jared ground his teeth together as anger coursed hotly through his veins. 

'How did you know Jensen had been locked in the clinic, Genevieve?'  Jared said with a deadly calm that threatened all kinds of violence.  None of them had revealed any of the details of the attack; he hadn't wanted anyone to know Jensen's business. 

Genevieve was clearly caught off guard by the question, considering she'd just offered herself up as his Beta and expecting to be accepted immediately in Jared’s time of distress, 'I...I…Jensen told me.'  

'Really?  I can't really imagine that, Genevieve; Jensen hardly talks about that day ever and you're telling me that my shy Beta, who hates any kind of attention, simply came out and told you all about it.'  The mocking disbelief in his voice would have put any Beta on edge, but not Genevieve, she simply sat next to him, as cool and collected as always. 

'No, not _everything_ , he was just venting I guess.'  Genevieve then, foolishly, tried to get the conversation back to where it had been moments ago.  'What do you think about my.....'

'Did you tell Jensen all those things you thought about you being my Beta instead of him?'  Jared shot off another question, his suspicions about his old friend’s part in Jensen’s ever present insecurities and finally his departure rising along with his anger.

'What.  No?  Of course not.'  Came the vehement reply.  Far too quickly to have been the truth. 

'Because every word that came out of your mouth just now has come out of Jensen's more than once.'

'Well then he obviously agreed with me then didn't he?'  Genevieve replied serenely, as though that were the obvious conclusion to come to, rather than her planting the seeds of doubt in his Beta’s mind herself.

Jared's bitter laughter filled the room, 'How could I have been so blind, Genevieve? How could you do this?  Not just to Jensen but to _me_.  I should have known. Jensen didn't really think I was anything like Morgan, did he?  And taking pills from the clinic, don't you think Misha and Chris might have noticed and told me about that?  How could you do this?!'  Jared’s voice gradually got louder as he fired questions at the Beta sitting beside him, ignoring the slight look of panic on her face at having been found out.

'I don't...I don't understand.  What are you taking about?'  She tried, but Jared had heard enough to know what she was and what she had done.  He would deal with her once he had found his Beta and brought him home where he belonged.

Jared's front door burst open and Chris came tumbling in, 'Jay, I've just spoken to Richard from the grocery store and he told me everything Genevieve told Jensen before he left.  She told him that she was moving in with you as your Beta and that…that she was pregnant.'  Chris finished, glaring at the Beta sitting uncomfortably on Jared’s couch.

Jared gasped and took a step away from the female werewolf, 'Oh my God, you told him I'd claimed you?  You bitch, you _knew_ what that would do to him.'  

'Yes, I did, he didn't _deserve_ you Jared.’  She shouted back, for the first time discarding all the  pretence and allowing her true self and motives to come forth.  And God, had she always been this rotten inside?  ‘I've waited for you my whole fucking life, I _deserve_ to be your Beta, Jared, not that little, broken whore who was scared of his own damn shadow.'  

Genevieve stamped her booted foot, 'This is my place, Jared, by your side, like it's always been.  Jensen was just in the way, I know you felt sorry for him and that's just because you are so kind hearted, but he's gone now and we can be together.'

'You thought he was in the way, Jesus, Genevieve?  He's the love of my goddamn life.  You're _nothing_ compared to him.  And even if I never get him back,’ he carried on despite the painful lurch his heart made as he said that- that was _never_ going to happen, _never,_ ‘There is no way in Hell that you will ever be my Beta.  Now get the fuck out of my house before I throw you though the door myself.’

'Jay?'  She tried desperately, the look on her fact showed that she clearly didn’t understand how her little scheme could possibly have gone wrong.

'GOOO!'  He bellowed and he was sure that every wolf in his territory heard it.  
  



	26. Chapter Twenty-Six.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Twenty-Six: Lykke Li- ‘Possibility.’ Jensen thinks back to his time with Jared, now that it’s over, and considers maybe that’s all the happiness he’s going to get him in life. He's left his heart back with Jared and he’ll never get to feel that way again.

** Chapter Twenty-Six. **

_ Jensen. _

Jensen wandered through the woods, feeling safe in the knowledge that he was far enough away from Jared's territory not to cause them any more trouble.  He felt like his heart had been ripped in two, though, and he'd left half of it back at Jared's house.  Jensen had never felt like that, not even after his parents died, not even after Tom was killed and his whole world had fallen apart; he just felt so empty and so alone.  

He had never been more frightened in his entire life.  

What if he couldn't live without Jared?  He didn't know an awful lot about mate dynamics, but what happened if a Beta was claimed and then discarded as he had been?  _Could_ he find another Alpha?  But then he supposed that didn't really matter since he didn't _want_ another Alpha if he couldn't have Jared, and he couldn't have him.  Jared was taken; he had a beautiful Beta and he was going to have a load of gorgeous puppies.  Jensen smiled, despite his own melancholy that those puppies wouldn’t be his and Jared’s but Jared’s and Genevieve’s.  At least Jared would be happy, and the pack would have a proper Beta rather than Jensen desperately trying, and more likely than not failing, to live up to something he wasn't. 

Jensen shook his head trying to rid his mind of thoughts of Jared.  Like that was ever possible.  He was hungry and needed to hunt.  This he could do; he'd done this for Tom's Pack when he was younger and he soon found that it was a skill that he had maintained even through his years under Morgan's paw.  Jensen sniffed the air and smelt a deer and quick as a shot he was off after it, fast even in his human form.  It sensed him coming though, he had never been very good at making a stealthy approach, but since he was quick and agile, even without his enhanced wolf features, he was able to take the deer down in a matter of moments. 

Jensen built a small and hasty fire to cook the meat; despite being a werewolf, uncooked meat had never really appealed to him.  He ate his fill, then packed up the rest in his backpack for later, leaving the remainder of the carcass to the scavengers in the woods.  He wouldn't hunt again for a few days, it took too much time and attracted predators that he didn't want to be dealing with, so the little meat he had salvaged would have to last him till he decided it was safe again.  Hell, he had spent four years pretty much starving whilst he had lived with Jeff, he could go a couple of weeks until he found himself somewhere new to call home.

He ignored the small voice in his head that told him he’d never find that place because the only place he wanted to call home was miles and miles behind him now. 

Jensen was still trying to decide his next move; he hadn’t been on his own since he was a young pup and he was having a hard time making the right decisions.  First, he needed to decide whether he wanted to go it alone or try to find another pack.  The latter thought scared him; he'd experienced both ends of the spectrum when it came to pack life and he really didn't want to be a part of a pack like Morgan's ever again.  Yet the endless loneliness and solitude that the wilderness offered scared him too but, at least, he knew he could trust himself; other werewolves were an unknown quantity and that thought did not sit well in his gut. 

Decision made; he decided he would continue on alone for a little while and find somewhere small and warm to stay and lick his wounds, and maybe try to learn to live with the gaping hole in his heart. 

****

Something woke Jensen up in the middle of his fourth night in the cave he had found.  It was warm and dry and Jensen had easily been able to make a fire, now that he was out of the biting wind blowing outside, and use the few blankets he'd brought with him to fashion a small bed for himself.  He didn't know what had awoken him but after years spent as a captive he was a light sleeper, waking at any movement around him; unless he was near Jared, of course, when he slept like the dead knowing he was completely safe and protected.  

He blinked his eyes open, trying to get them to adjust to the darkness.  They grew wide when he smelt a scent he hadn't encountered in months.  Jeff. 

'Hi there, Sweetheart, Jared get tired of you already, huh?'  Jensen couldn't help the shamed blush that graced his cheeks at that but he stood up in front of Jeff defiantly, nonetheless.  There was no one else to threaten here, no one Jensen had to protect, he could fight Jeff this time, even if it meant his death.  He wouldn't go back to the way things had been before, he couldn't. 

'What do you want Jeff?'  Jensen said, the words feeling a little strange in his mouth.

Jeff blinked in surprise, 'What happened to Alpha?  I taught you better than that Jensen.  Are we really going to have to start from scratch, because as much as those early days were _buckets_ of fun for me, I'm pretty sure they weren't all that great for you?'  Jeff phrased it like a question, as if Jensen's cries in those first few months hadn't been enough to show the pain he'd suffered at the man’s hands.  Jensen still shuddered at the memory. 

'You're not my Alpha, Jeff, and you never were.'  They both knew it, but neither had said it aloud before; it felt liberating for Jensen to voice the truth for once.

'Oh really?  Who is then?  Jared?  Because Jared's not here, darlin', and from what Jake's told me, he's found himself another pretty little Beta to shack up with now, leaving you out in the cold.'  The words sliced through all of Jensen's guards, making him shake a little.  It was obviously already news that the Padalecki Pack had a new Pack Beta and that hurt more than Jensen could say, even though he'd already accepted the knowledge that he wasn't good enough, this made everything so final in a way that it just hadn't been before.  Then the other bit of information hit him.  'Jake?'

'Hey, there Pretty, you miss me?'  The voice of his other tormentor echoed off the walls of the cave.

Jensen backed up into the nearest wall as the other werewolf entered the cave.  Two wolves against one was never going to be a fair fight, but two highly skilled and trained Alphas against a very rusty Beta was pretty much a lost cause.  Jensen _would_ fight though; he had nothing left to live for now anyway, since he had lost Jared, so if he was going down he would, at least, try and take one of them with him.  He'd make them pay for what they’d done to him and every other wolf they had hurt before he died.  

'No, I'm not going back to that.'  He charged at Jeff, his shoulder hitting the older man in the stomach causing him to double over and hiss in pain.  Jensen straightened up again and smacked Jeff in the nose with the back of his head forcing a pained grunt from the man.  Jensen smiled at that, a grim satisfaction spreading through him at the thought of hurting the man who had hurt so many people Jensen loved.  

Jake looked on, slack jawed, until the crack of Jeff's nose breaking on the back of Jensen’s head drew him out of his reverie. 

'You little bitch.'  He said rushing at Jensen.  Jensen sprang away and shifted mid jump to land on all fours.  Jensen wasn’t sure who was more surprised that he’d actually managed to shift without the moon, himself or his opponents, but he supposed if there was ever a stressful situation which might force his wolf out this was pretty much it. 

'Well look at that.'  Jeff mocked. 'The kitty’s still got claws after all.  Did Jay teach you that trick?  I was sure I'd managed to train that out of you.'  Both the Alphas shifted too causing Jensen took a step back; they were both larger than he was and better trained to fight in their lupine forms.  Jensen, well, Jensen was still getting used to his wolf body again but he didn't shift back; he was still faster, larger and more resilient as a wolf than as a human. 

The Alphas jumped at him at the same time, one from each side, and Jensen yelped when he felt teeth pierce his shoulder blade and a sharp claw rake down his back.  He gnashed widely at the other wolves, trying to get in a bite whilst they were still close but they danced away before he manage to could sink his teeth into anything.  

Jensen shook his head against the pain in his shoulder, hell he'd endured much so worse than this, he just needed to focus.  Jensen moved to fight Jake; he feigned an attack to Jake's open left flank and then charged at the right at the very last moment, landing a deep bite on Jake's right flank causing the bigger wolf to howl in pain.  But Jensen didn't let go quickly enough and Jake fixed him in an iron-strong head lock whilst Jensen felt sharp claws digging into his back and pushing him to the floor.  

Jensen snarled and struggled when he felt Jeff place both his paws on the top of his back and scrape his claws all the way down Jensen's spine.  He was losing, he could feel the blood rushing from his wounds and he was getting dizzy.  Jensen relaxed his neck muscles and managed to roll away from Jake's hold, slowly, causing the pain in his back to flare excruciatingly.  Jensen stood back up on all fours, limping slightly from the bite on his shoulder to look at the wolves before him.  

Jeff shifted back to his human form, clearly, so he could talk to Jensen; the man's words were almost as dangerous as his claws, they were like poison and Jensen had felt their bitter bite before.  Jake stayed in wolf form waiting for Jensen to run or maybe launch another attack.  

‘Come on Jensen, it's over, you can barely stand.  I'll give you a little credit, here, you did good, now let's stop this silliness and make up.'  He reached out his hand to stroke Jensen's muzzle but Jensen sunk his teeth into it, fully intending to rip the man's arm off if he dared to try and touch him again.  

Jeff shifted again as soon as Jensen’s teeth found flesh and Jensen found himself thrown against the wall of the cave.  He felt his ribs crack on impact and pain vibrated down his whole body.  Jensen tried to get up from where he'd fallen, he needed to be ready for the next attack.  He fell back to the floor, though, his legs unable to hold him up and he felt his vision rapidly dimming.  

Jensen heard huffing sounds from the two other werewolves and knew, from past experience, that they were laughing at him, at his weak and futile attempts to protect himself.   
  



	27. Chapter Twenty-Seven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Twenty-Seven: Avril Lavigne- ‘Keep Holding On.’ This song pretty much describes from when Jared first hears Jensen’s cry to getting him back to the clinic. Jensen just needs to hold on until Jared makes it there to save him and after he gets stabbed, Jared begs him not to let go and come back to him.

** Chapter Twenty-Seven. **

_ Jared _

It had been a week since Jensen had disappeared and Jared was frantically pacing his kitchen trying to plan his next move.  He'd sent wolves out to the closest packs, the ones he was on familiar terms with anyway, to see if Jensen had asked to join any of them or if they'd seen any strange wolves come their way in the past week.  Four of the five wolves he had sent had already come back and answered in the negative.  

**** 

Laura, his last messenger, came back two days later with a message for Jared from the Pileggi Pack saying that they had seen two foreign werewolves hunting together near the edge of their territory.  They hadn't passed close enough to threaten the pack's safety so Mitch hadn't approached them but he had felt Jared should know, and hoped that it would aid him in his search for Jensen. 

Jared had nothing else to go on, and those wolves might live in the forest in the neutral zones and might have run into Jensen.  Therefore, he ordered Chad to remain behind to look after the pack whilst Jared set off for the Pileggi lands. 

****

Jared heard a high, pained cry as he neared the Pileggi Territory and he knew instantly whom had made it.  _Jensen_.  He quickened his pain; his lupine limbs working triple time to take him to the noises of distress coming from his Beta.  Jared came to an abrupt stop at the opening of a small cave, set far back from the woods, and shifted back to his human form; he had smelt blood, freshly spilled.  It was Jensen's blood, and it was everywhere.  He saw Morgan, the bastard, approaching a smaller wolf who was drawn up tightly in a ball in the corner.  

'Get the fuck away from him, Morgan.  I let you live, once, I won't make that mistake again.'  Jared growled, letting his years as Head Alpha colour his voice with confidence.

'Jay, you _really_ need to learn to stop sticking your snout into things that don't concern you.  It'll get you into trouble one day.'  Morgan replied smoothly, not even turning round to look at him just continuing his advance on Jensen.

Jared saw red, Jensen was his mate, his Beta, everything about him concerned Jared.  He shifted again and went for Morgan's throat, intent on ripping it out this time.  Morgan shifted, too, and snapped his jaws back at him.  Morgan was good, a well seasoned fighter, but Jared was still the larger and younger of the two, and Morgan had clearly not faired well in his time in the woods, alone, without the comforts and ease of pack life.

Jared smirked, internally, as he began to notice signs that the older wolf was tiring long before he, himself, had even _begun_ to feel the strain of their battle.  Jared could finally see the opportunity arising to rid Morgan from all their lives and Jensen's nightmares; he just had to wait for the moment the wolf's guard slipped and he knew that would be soon.  

Suddenly, then he see it the opening he'd been waiting for; Morgan flashed a glance towards the forest, distracted by something, and Jared pounced.  He closed his jaws around Morgan's neck and tore the flesh away.  The body convulsed for an instant and Jared felt the blood paint his muzzle red as it gushed from the older wolf's body.  A second later, Jared dropped the dead body to the floor.  It was over, it was _finally_ over. 

A harsh cry from the back of the cave caused him to whirl around.  'NOOO!'  He caught Jensen as the man stumbled into him, a knife lodged deep in his back. 

'What the…?  Jensen, baby, what happened?'  Jared gasped out; he didn't know what to do, remove the knife?  Leave it in?  Jared looked up and saw another man standing in the cave entrance staring daggers at him and Jensen.  

'That was meant for you, _Alpha,_ but I suppose this,'  he waved a hand at Jensen, 'will kill just as suredly as if I'd stabbed _you_ with that knife.'  Jared looked down in horror, realisation dawning; Jensen had saved him, even after he thought Jared had discarded him for someone else.  

Jared looked up again at the cave entrance, when he heard a low growl that he recogised.  He saw Chris for a second just before the man ended Jake's life, much like he'd promised he would do all those weeks ago.  

'Jay? Jay? Why...why are you here? You aren't...aren't supposed to be here?'  Jensen panted out, in small painful breaths.  The genuine confusion in his mate's quiet voice broke his heart.

'Where else would I be, Love?'  Jared said softly, stroking down the side of Jensen’s beautiful face.  Jared pulled the man to his chest, almost into his lap, and he could feel the blood coating his shaking hands as he held Jensen close.  Jared placed a hand over the younger wolf's heart and could feel the erratic beat beneath his palm.  Oh God, please don’t take him from me now, _please_.

'I don't...?  Your Beta, she's…she's...you're going to be a father, Jared.'  Jensen's voice was faint, barely above a hoarse whisper and Jared doubted he would have been able to hear it if hadn't had the Beta's face pressed so close into his neck.

'I'm with my Beta.  _You_ are my Beta, Jensen; Genevieve lied, she isn't having my pups and she never will.  I'm sorry she made you think otherwise.  I chose you, I will always choose you.'

'Really?'  Jensen pulled back for a moment to look into Jared's eyes; the weak smile on Jensen's pale face was a poor substitute for the man's usual bright one yet, in that moment, it was still the most wonderous thing Jared thought he'd ever seen.

Really.'

'That's nice...'  Jensen mumbled before he passed out in Jared's arms.

****

'Jared, he looks bad, Jay, I'm not sure he's gonna make...'  Jared was getting them dressed quickly, in order to return to the pack, in the clothes Chris had brought with him.  He pulled a pair of sweats up Jensen's legs to keep him warm when he was done.

'Don't say it, _God,_ just don't.  Chris, do what you can for him here, then I can get him back to the clinic.  He’s going to be fine.'  Chris nodded shakily, quickly grabbing his supplies and kneeling down next to the unconscious wolf assessing his injuries.  

'I need to get this knife out, I don't want it shifting and maybe piercing his heart when we carry him back but it's going to bleed like a sonovabitch so get ready to press down as hard as you can when I take it out.'  Chris’ hand went to the hilt of the knife and then he pulled it back, cursing, when it touched his skin.  'Fuck, Jay, that's silver.  Those fucking bastards.  Jesus, I have no idea what kind of damage that's going to have done.'  He grasped the bottom of his shirt and wrapped it around his hand and then pulled out the knife.  

The pained whimper hit them both hard and Chris threw the knife to the back of the cave.  Jared pressed down hard on the wound trying to staunch the blood flow.  It wasn't as bad as Chris had expected it to be due to the silver burning Jensen's skin and almost cauterizing the wound but it looked deep.  _Too deep_ , a small voice in Jared's head dared to whisper before he could stop it.  

Chris went to work, quickly stitching some of the larger, deeper cuts on Jensen’s body, to help stop the bleeding on the journey back, and disinfecting the wounds as he went.  Jensen lay limp in Jared's arms the whole time, his uneven breathing shallow and rapid.  

Finally Chris sat back, 'That's all I can do here, I haven't got the supplies to do anything about the damage that knife has done, I'll have to do that back at the clinic, if he...'  He looked up at Jared when the man snarled at him, 'When we get back.'

Jared knew what his friend was going to say ‘ _if he makes it’_ before he stopped himself.  Well, to Jared, there was no other option; Jensen was _going_ to make it.  He hadn't found Jensen just to lose him all over again, especially not to a bastard like Abel and especially not because of him. 

'Okay, let's move.'  Jared stood up and lifted Jensen's smaller body into his arms.  The two wolves immediately began to run back to the pack, Jared wishing with every minute that passed that Chris had brought his truck with him.  

****

Finally, they made it back to the borders and Jared ran to the clinic, kicking open the doors.  He carried Jensen into one of the operating rooms.

'Jesus Christ, Jay, what the hell happened?'  Misha asked, shocked, as he took in Jensen's pale, shivering form as it was laid down on the bed. 

'Morgan, Abel.'  Jared was breathing hard, he'd sprinted the whole way back and while he was young and fit, doing that in human form with his mate in his arms was a whole new experience for him.  'I'll explain later but right now you need to help him Misha, I _can't_ lose him, I won't.'  

'Alright, Alpha, but you need to leave so Chris and I can work.’  Misha pushed him gently towards the door of the room, and away from Jensen.

'Like hell I'm ever leaving him alone again.'  He stood steady, looking Misha rebelliously in the eye, daring the smaller man to challenge him.

'Jay, you need to go.'  Jared felt Chris touch his arm and turn him round, 'You know I won't let anything happen to him, you can be right outside if I need to come get you,'… _if he's about to die, if we’re about to lose him_.  

Chris didn't say it, but Jared heard it anyway, and that drained the fight right out of him, leaving only despair and desperation in its place.  He nodded, realising that he'd only be in the way if he stayed and that they were losing precious minutes whilst he stood and argued about it. 

'I'll be right outside,’ Jared walked up to Jensen, pushed the sweaty hair from his forehead and kissed it.  'Be safe, baby, and please come back to me,' he whispered before reluctantly leaving the room.  
  



	28. Chapter Twenty-Eight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soundtrack to Chapter Twenty-Eight: Etta James- ‘At Last.’ I think this song is kind of perfect to end my story with since Jensen and Jared have been through so much to find each other: ‘And here we are in Heaven for you are mine, at last.’

** Chapter Twenty-Eight.  
  
** _ Jared. _

Five hours later and Chris emerged, blood staining his scrubs and a tentative smile on his face.  'I think he's going be okay, Jay.  The knife had punctured a lung but we went in and fixed that, all of his other wounds are sutured and the burns treated.  He's got a broken wrist which we've put in a cast and we’ve wrapped his broken ribs so it won’t hurt as much when he breathes.  The blood loss was really the most worrying thing but we gave him a few bags so that should see him right.

'The full moon'll next week will help him heal, I wouldn't recommend he change before that, though, it might pull some of his stitches out, give him a little time to heal the human way first, then we can let his wolf do the rest.'  

Jared pulled his best friend into a bone crushing hug; the man had saved his mate's life and Jared would never be able to repay him.

'Thank you Chris, I don't know how to...just thank you.'  Chris smiled slightly and nodded.  

'You can go in and see him now, he's resting in exam room three.'  Jared nodded and walked off to find his mate. 

Jensen still looked pale, even more so against the bright white of the sheets, and Jared sat in the chair by his bedside.  'Hey baby, what am I gonna do with you, huh?  Going to turn me prematurely grey with all this nearly dying business.  Why'd you have to go and do that, why?'  He buried his face in Jensen's neck, feeling the tears welling in his eyes. 

'Because I love you.'  Came the croaky, unexpected reply from the man in the bed.

'Oh God, Jen, you don't know how good it is to hear your voice.'  Jared cried out, gently squeezing the man on the bed.

'Alpha, I'm...I'm so sorry I left but Genevieve said she was moving in and having your puppies; I thought you'd claimed her and if you'd claimed her then...then you couldn’t really have claimed me.  I'm sorry, but it all sounded so logical at the time, she's so perfect for you and I never really understood why...'

'Stop, Jensen, _please_ do not finish that sentence.  I shouldn't have left you that morning, I'm sorry.  But _you_ are my Beta, my one and only, and believe me, you are more perfect than you can possibly imagine.  I love you, I will _always_ love you.  I'm going to take you back to our house when Misha releases you and show you just how much.'  He stroked Jensen's arm softly as he spoke and smiled at the shivers that ran down Jensen's body from the contact. 

'My Alpha.'  Jensen nuzzled closer into Jared's neck.

'Always and forever, baby.  Always and forever.'

****

A week later, Misha visited the house.  Jensen had been recovering well and they were gearing up for the change the next night to hopefully fully heal the rest of his wounds.   Jensen was still asleep when Misha knocked and Jared led the other man into the kitchen for some coffee. 

'So, here to check on the patient?'  Jared smiled at his friend; Misha and Chris had been great, coming out to check on Jensen every time Jared had made a panicked and paranoid call about him.  Jensen had always been fine but neither of them had complained, they'd just smiled fondly at him and left again.

'Yes and no, Jay.'  Misha replied cryptically.

Jared frowned. 'Is something wrong?'  His worry amped up for the wolf upstairs in his bed. 

'No, I don't think so but I have some news that I wanted to share with you before I shared it with Jensen.'  Jared nodded, bracing himself as news about Jensen was so often not good, and waited for Misha to continue.  'We took some blood to check for infection when Jensen was at the hospital and we discovered something.'

'Oh God, is he sick Meesh?  Tell me what I can do!'  Jared asked his friend frantically, making to get up from the table and rush to Jensen's side.

Misha smiled and shook his head, 'No, he's not sick, Jared.  He's pregnant, you're going to be a daddy, Jay.'  Jared eyes widened, and he looked up in the direction of his room. He was going to be a father.  Tears blurred his vision and he brought a hand to his mouth.  'You alright there, Alpha?'  Misha beamed at him.  Jared got up and pulled the other man up into a hug.

'Christ, thank you Misha, thank you.'  He whispered in Misha’s ear.

They were interrupted by the sound of retching from upstairs.  Misha quirked an eyebrow at Jared, 'Well, at least you know he's not sick.'  Jared grinned at his old friend, happier than he could ever remember being in his entire life. 

'Well, I gotta go and help Jen out, Misha, thanks for the news, I'll bring Jensen over to the clinic after the Moon to get him checked out.'

'You go do that, Jay. Congratulations, we're all really happy for you and Jensen.  That boy deserves to be happy and you're the one to do it, Alpha.'  Misha nodded to him and left. 

Jared leapt up the stairs to his mate.  He knelt down next to Jensen in the bathroom.  

'I don't feel so good, Jay.'  Jensen rasped out, his head resting on his forearm on the toilet seat. 

'I know, baby, you done?'  Jensen nodded weakly, 'Let’s get you back to bed then.'  He lifted his Beta into his arms and walked him over to the bed. 

'I could've walked, you know.'  Jensen snarked, but he still snuffled closer into Jared’s chest.

'I know.'

Jensen shook his head, in exasperation, as Jared laid him back down on the bed.

'I've got some news, Jen.'  Jensen looked at him with sleepy eyes, looking undeniably gorgeous, 'You're pregnant.'  Jensen's eyes widened almost comically. 

'Really?'

'Yep, you've got my pups in there.'  Jared let his hand fall gently onto Jensen's stomach, stroking this thumb across the warm skin. 

Jensen's hand fell over his but he didn't say anything, just lay staring at their joined hands.  'Jen?'  Jared said worriedly, maybe it was too much too soon for him, he'd certainly been through a lot lately.  'You want this right?'

Jensen looked up at him then, his bright green eyes filled with tears, 'Oh God, yes Jay, I want this more than anything.'  He kissed Jared hard on the mouth and climbed into the larger man's lap.  

Jared was surprised by the move but his body was pretty damn happy about it if the instant tightness of his jeans was anything to go by and he wrapped his arms around Jensen's back to keep him from falling.  'Fill me up, Alpha, I wanna feel you, _please_.'  Jensen whispered in his ear. 

Jared didn't need to be told twice, it had been way too long since he'd been inside his Beta and he stood in a instant, lifting Jensen with him as Jensen wrapped his legs around Jared’s waist and clung to him with his arms around Jared's shoulders. 

Jared managed to get his jeans and boxers down to the middle of his thighs whilst pulling Jensen sweats down and off.  He sat back down on the bed and picked Jensen up and dropped him down on his hard cock, Jensen’s natural lubricant easing the way completely.  

Jensen breath hitched as he was abruptly filled, 'Oh God, yes.'  He whispered into Jared's ear. 

'Come on, Beta, lift yourself up, show me how much you want it.'  Jensen lifted himself up onto his knees and slammed himself back down causing them both to groan at the sensation.  Jensen watched as Jensen gracefully rode his lap, up and down, his head thrown back and his eyes closed, his thighs straining to lift himself up almost completely off of Jared before dropping back down into Jared’s lap.  It was fucking  mesmerizing to watch.

Though, soon, Jared couldn’t hold himself still any longer and began thrusting up into Jensen’s warm willing body.  He grabbed hold of Jensen’s hips and as he thrust upwards he pulled Jensen down impaling the younger man on his cock over and over again until Jensen was a writhing mess above him, looking completely desperate and so goddamn sexy that Jared thought he might just die from this.  

But what a way to go.  

Jared growled and grabbed his Beta around the waist and flipped him onto his back on the bed and thrust hard into his mate's willing body, watching the smaller man arch and mewl every time he slammed home.  Jared set up a punishing rhythm as Jensen gasped and grabbed at his shoulders trying to find purchase on anything he could.  Jared grabbed Jensen’s hands and placed them on the headboard encouraging the smaller man to curl his fingers around the wood and hold on.  

Jared smiled as he felt the wolf grip the wood tight and hold his hands there once Jared had taken his own away.  Jared wrapped his hand around Jensen's cock as he felt his knot catch at Jensen’s rim and pumped it hard and fast in time with his thrusts.  Finally, Jensen came with a cry as Jared's knot lodged in his ass, nudging against his prostate.  

The sight of his mate falling apart sent Jared over the edge and he kissed Jensen deeply as he rode out his own orgasm.  They parted, panting for breath.

'You're perfect.'  Jared murmured against Jensen's lips. 

And Jensen just whispered back.  'Only for you.'  

 

THE END.  
  
  
Thanks so much for reading.  xx  
  
  



End file.
